The call of the void
by Yamaharmonica
Summary: (AU) In his final year of high school, Nagisa has no self esteem and no will of his own. He has found himself in a secret relationship with Gakushuu Asano. Nagisa knows that their relationship is unhealthy, but he doesn't want to break it off. However, the arrival of Karma Akabane, a transfer student with a dangerous reputation has the potential to change everything.
1. Chapter 1

**Been lurking on here for a while reading fanfiction so i thought I'd write my own. This fanfiction wont be explicit but it will touch on VERY dark themes, so this is your warning! DO NOT READ IF YOU DO NOT WANT TO READ A DARK STORY!**

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 _ **L'appel du vide** \- **The call of the void**_ _. When you are standing on the balcony of a tall building, looking down at the ground and on some track your brain says "what would it feel like to jump". When you are holding a kitchen knife thinking, "I wonder if this is sharp enough to cut myself with. Uncontrollable Self destructive impulses"_.

Senior year of high school is always complicated. Not only do you have exams to study for you also have the daunting prospect of needing to decide what to do with your life once you leave the predictable cocoon of school. It's unfair, really, to foist such a large decision so suddenly, to cram kids in a school for their entire life, then force them to make a decision about their role in the 'real world' as soon as they hit 18. Nagisa Shiota, however, unlike most seniors did not have to think about this choice. Or more accurately, he didn't have a choice; His mother had decided that he'd go to Kansai university and study architecture, because that was what she always wanted to do. Of course, Nagisa could defy her, but if he went anywhere else, she'd cut him off financially and kick him out the house. With extortionate housing fees these days, there's no way Nagisa could be independent (His mother made sure he never saved up enough to even contemplate it). Besides. There was nothing else Nagisa even wanted to do. He often felt as if he had no will of his own, he was just a puppet. Puppets don't have dreams for the future so he might as well just do as his mother said.

If he told Gakushuu this, then Gakushuu would probably tell Nagisa that he was a hopeless pushover and was weak-willed with no backbone. But Nagisa had a sneaking suspicion that those traits were exactly what Gakushuu liked about Nagisa. No, _Like_ is the wrong word; Because Nagisa was a weak-willed hopeless pushover, Gakushuu found him convenient to use.

Nagisa was nothing to Gakushuu until he was everything. Gakushuu could go days, or even weeks not acknowledging Nagisa as anything other than another student at the school, part of the faceless masses. Gakushuu was, of course in all the advanced classes, so Nagisa would only see him if he gave a speech in assembly or there was some sort of sports tournament. At those times, Gakushuu was the perfect honor student, the charismatic leader never without a smile and full of motivational words that everyone admired. Very different from the Gakushuu Nagisa knew. Sometimes Gakushuu's streak of ignoring Nagisa would go on for so long that Nagisa would begin to think Gakushuu really had given him up.

But then he'd get a text. It never said much. Just when and where. It was never a question either, always a statement. Gakushuu knew Nagisa would come. And he was right every time. The location was almost always the student council office and the time was always after hours. Sometimes Nagisa contemplated not going, he _knew_ that Gakushuu didn't care about him, he _knew_ Gakushuu just saw him as something he could use when he was bored or frustrated. But Nagisa _always_ went. He tried to rationalise that he was just using Gakushuu too (being able to sleep with a hot guy isn't so bad, right)? But in Nagisa's heart he knew, he _knew_ that it was more than that.

Those few moments were Gakushuu was kissing him and touching him were heaven. The few seconds were Gakushuu looked at Nagisa like he needed him was enough to make Nagisa's heart melt and mind race. Gakushuu was an asshole, but Nagisa couldn't help but be drawn to him (Perhaps it was because, no matter how one-sided it was, Gakushuu was the only one who showed Nagisa any attention). Nagisa's favourite part about their trysts was after the sex had finished, and Gakushuu would lie with Nagisa in his arms even if it was a little uncomfortably on a carpeted floor. _That_ was the only time Nagisa thought Gakushuu seemed the most affectionate _"You're so beautiful._ " He'd whisper. Those few minutes before Gakushuu pushed him off to the school showers were bliss.

Gakushuu had some very strict rules. The most obvious ones; _Keep it subtle, don't call me 'Gakushuu' when there's other people around, DO NOT tell anyone else_. Then other ones; _Don't sleep with anyone else while we're involved, Don't text me unless its an emergency, wait for me to text you_ and strangest of all _I make all the moves. Don't initiate any touching. Do Not kiss me._

The last rule proved difficult at times for Nagisa. He broke it once right at the beginning of the relationship by daring to kiss the other on the neck. He'd never seen Gakushuu so furious. He looked as though he wanted to slap Nagisa, and after that didn't contact him again for over a month. Needless to say, Nagisa never tried to do that again; Gakushuu had some serious control issues. He was rough as well, Nagisa always ended up with new bruises after their meetings. But he rather liked that; The darkened patches of skin served as a souvenir of his experience, a reminder of the evening. Proof of what he had done. Whenever he was ignored by Gakushuu at school, Nagisa would press down on the bruises on his wrist to remind himself of how much attention he had been receiving a few nights ago.

The thing that bothered Nagisa the most about his relationship with Gakushuu however, was knowing how disposable and replaceable he was. He knew Gakushuu had _others_ he was seeing. Nagisa knew because he occasionally saw love bites on Gakushuu's body. Never on the neck though. It filled Nagisa with hopelessness and jealousy. He wasn't even aloud to kiss Gakushuu on the cheek, but there was someone else marking him. Nagisa wanted to ask who it was, wanted to demand Gakushuu be exclusive as Nagisa was, but he knew Gakushuu had all the control. _If you don't like it, then lets break it off._ He would say. Just imagining those words broke Nagisa's heart.

Nagisa often wondered why Gakushuu bothered with him at all (surely he could get anyone he wanted). Then, he was forced to realise that he knew very little about who Gakushuu actually was. Of course, he knew superficial things; He was the Chairman's son, he was the student council president, he was rich, he was consistently the highest scorer in the school, he was involved in an endless amount of extra curricular activities from sports to music, he worked hard- probably too hard. But although they'd been intimate many times, Nagisa still struggled to work out Gakushuu's motivations (which was strange because normally he was good at that). All he really knew was that Gakushuu had a lot of anger, and he took it out on Nagisa. And Nagisa let him.

Nagisa wasn't stupid. Or at least, he wasn't completely stupid. He knew he was being used, he knew his relationship with Gakuhsuu was pointless at best, damaging at worse. He knew being involved in an arrangement that made himself this miserable was self-destructive. But he just couldn't stop.

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 _ **If the first chapter wasn't indication enough, there is going to be a lot of melodrama in this story. Next chapter will be Karma's introduction. review if you think this story is worth continuing.**_


	2. Chapter 2

**Karma introduction chapter. not sure if i should continue this or not.**

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 _ **Altschmerz : weariness with the same old issues that you've always had—the same boring flaws and anxieties you've been gnawing on for years, which leaves them soggy and tasteless and inert, with nothing interesting left to think about, nothing left to do but spit them out and wander off to the backyard, ready to dig up some fresher pain you might have buried long ago.**_

Kunugigaoka is probably the last high school within travelling distance of Karma's house that he hasn't been kicked out of yet, so this really is his last chance. Karma has to be good and not get excluded for five more months if he wants to make it to graduation, something he's not entirely sure he can do, because judging by the amount of assholes in this school, keeping out of fights would be hard. Well, what would one expect from a school were Asano Gakuho was the Chairman. If this wasn't the last resort, Karma would of refused to have attended.

Karma had an impressive school record in more ways than one; On the one hand, he had excellent grades for all the tests he showed up for, placing him in the top ten highest scoring kids in the year at his old school (and that was without studying), on the other hand, he'd been excluded from five schools since he was six years old for a mixture of truancy, fighting, answering back to teachers and playing pranks. What could he say? When he got bored or mad he got into trouble.

Karma thought school was stupid anyway, almost everything they taught here was easy, and what was the point? People work their asses of in school to get into a good university, were they work their asses off to get a degree only to find they can't get a job and now they have crippling student debt. Karma swore to himself he wouldn't fall into that trap- He was smart enough to cheat the system and get success without following the normie route.

BUT, his grandma would love to see him graduate, so he decided to at least make a final attempt at high school. Karma decided that the best way to make it through school without getting into fights was just to ignore people as much as possible, because people are the route of all evil. His plan was going well, until he met Nagisa.

"For this assignment, you can pick your own pairs." The science teacher said. This is a good thing for people who _have_ friends. But it strikes dread into the heart of loners. Pretty soon, everyone would pair up, and the loners in class would be shamefully revealed and put on display. In the end the only people left were Karma and Nagisa. Karma had seen Nagisa before in class, but he hadn't paid much attention to him. He was so small and meek it was easy to overlook him. Karma was a suspicious person who was constantly on the look out for enemies, but Nagisa appeared so harmless he didn't even register.

"So, it seems as though us two loners are working together. My name's Karma Akabane by the way." Karma said, taking the initiative and dragging his chair over to Nagisa's table. The small boy looked up at him.

"Oh, I know." He said reflexively, then blushed. "I- I- mean I've heard about you- other people- "

Karma couldn't help but snicker watching Nagisa's embarrassed reaction. "I see my reputation precedes me." Karma said. He supposed the kids in this school had already heard about how he'd put someone in the hospital in his last school. Karma sort of just wanted to be unnoticed so others would leave him be, but he seemed to have the ability to forge out a reputation no matter were he went. Karma wasn't made to lurk in the background no matter how much he wants to. After all, the background is safer. He was sort of jealous of guys like Nagisa.

"I may of heard a few things- Anyway, My name's Nagisa Shiota. Just call me Nagisa" Nagisa said, happy to change the subject. Karma looked at him properly. He was small, couldn't be much taller than 5', and he had a slight frame to boot. He had large blue eyes, and long blue hair tied in a pony tail down his back. Truth be told, if it wasn't for the uniform Karma would of assumed he was a girl, and a pretty one at that. Even Nagisa's voice hadn't broken yet adding to the illusion of femininity.

"Just to confirm- you are really a boy, right?" Karma asked. For the second time in the short interaction, Nagisa blushed.

"Yes! I am a boy!" He huffed, his cheeks tinged red. But even in anger, he still seemed harmless. Karma quite liked people like this. People he could feel safe around and tease.

"Just checking; It's hard for me to tell.. Can you blame me?" Karma said with a mischeviuos chuckle. "Anyway, what was this work we were supposed to be doing again? I was taking a nap while the teacher was talking."

"Seriously? How do you get such good grades!? Not that I'm keeping track or anything.."

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After their first proper meeting, Karma's interest in Nagisa increased. Of course, Karma wasn't the type of person to go out of his way to befriend someone, and he didn't mind being on his own. But if their class was ever doing group work, he'd pair up with Nagisa, and if Karrma was buying lunch from the school cafeteria he;d sit with him. Slowly, from this, a friendship built up.

Nagisa was in awe of Karma's confidence and his academic abilities. Karma would be lying if he said he didn't enjoy the admiration, and Nagisa was easy to be friends with; He wasn't threatened by Karma, he wasn't demanding, he wasn't too loud or annoying, and he almost always did pretty much what Karma said. Nagisa was such a weak-willed guy, Karma couldn't help but feel a little protective. Plus, they both liked the Sonic Ninja comics which was a bonus.

"So, I was wondering; why didn't you have any friends?" Karma asked casually one time when they were walking to the train station together. Nagisa's turned to look at him.

"That's kind of a tactless question." Nagisa said. He didn't like to be reminded he was a loner. "I used to have two best friends all through school; Sugino and Kayano. But Sugino's family moved, and Kayano got a big acting role she couldn't refuse so she's working on that and just taking lessons online. You might of heard of her- her stage name is Haruna Mase."

Karma's eyes widened. "You're friends with Haruna Mase?" He said in disbelief. "She's been in sitcoms and drama series since she was little. She plays the teenage daughter in that series 'Familyx4'.. She's a voice actress on that new anime.. and she's set to have a main role in the upcoming 'sonic ninja' movie!"

"wow, you sure know a lot about films and TV shows, Karma." Nagisa smiled.

"I watch a lot of daytime TV when I'm suspended from school." Karma admitted. "Can you get me her autograph? I bet I could sell it for a nice profit."

"And here I thought you were a real fan of hers." Nagisa laughed. "What about you? Why did you get kicked out of your last school. I mean. I've heard the rumors but I want to here it from you."

"The rumors are mostly accurate." Karma admitted. Normally being asked this stuff would piss him off, or put him on edge, but he had none of these feelings with Nagisa. In fact, it felt nice to have someone show an interest. "This asshole was bullying a kid with autism in the year below us. I told him to stop. He didn't. I _made_ him stop by breaking a few bones, so I got excluded. The asshole was one of the smartest kids in the year though, and a real teacher's pet, so nobody cared he was bullying. Teachers are all such hypocritical morons."

"The rumors left out the part about you saving a bullying victim." Nagisa said with a smile. "Maybe you're sweeter than you seem."

"Sweetness and light, that's me." Karma replied.

Nagisa laughed, a carefree expression on his face. Suddenly, the sound of beeping pierced the air. Nagisa had a text. He reached into his pocket and read it, and his expression changed instantly. What type of expression was that? Karma couldn't quite place it.. But suddenly Nagisa's thoughts were clearly far away from his conversation with Karma.

"Whats up?" Karma asked, curious.

"I have to go- " Nagisa said, already shoving his phone back in his pocket. Even as he spoke to Karma, he sounded a million miles away. "I've suddenly remembered.. I left something at school. See you tomorrow, Karma.."

"Are you sure this isn't to do with the text you got just then?" Karma asked, raising an eyebrow. But Nagisa was already out of earshot, he was surprisingly quick when he wanted to be. _Just what's going on? He's going back to school because he got that text, no doubt about it. But what's it all about. Maybe a girl wants to meet up with him- No. He isn't the type. Knowing Nagisa, someone is trying to extort money out of him. Maybe they have blackmail on him. Maybe they want to beat him up... He's such a hopeless pushover he's the perfect target for bullies. Damnit, Nagisa._

Before he even thought about it, Karma had took off, walking back to the school so fast his was verging on running. He couldn't shake the feeling that Nagisa was in some sort of trouble!

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Nagisa tried to even his breathing before he entered the student council room to disguise the fact he'd practically ran over here to make it as fast as he could. He didn't want Gakushuu to think he was too desperate, although, it may be too late for that. After a second or two, Nagisa pushed the door open and let himself in.

Gakushuu was sat on his usual chair, his laptop open and his eyes fixed to the screen. He didn't even look up when Nagisa walked in, just said. "You forgot to knock."

No ' _Sorry for the short notice_ ', no ' _How are you, Nagisa_ ', not even a ' _Hello_ '. Nagisa felt a strike of annoyance at his attitude (Karma's never like this). All Nagisa could do was mutter a bashful "Sorry." Then stand there awkwardly in the middle of the room waiting for Gakushuu to acknowledge him again. Gakushuu had been the one to call him here, yet he somehow had the ability to make Nagisa feel as though _he_ was the pest. Nagisa had a sneaking suspicion that this was a power-play on Gakushuu's part, making Nagisa feel uncomfortable to exert his dominance or some shit.

But Gakushuu was beautiful though, even when he was doing something mundane like typing on a computer. The sunset was filtering in through the window, capturing Gakushuu in it's light. A few seconds that felt like an eternity passed, and Gakushuu _finally_ looked at Nagisa. Nagisa almost gulped. He could tell by the look in Gakushuu's eyes that he was _not_ in a good mood today, and he was about to take all those frustrations out on Nagisa. Sometimes when Gakushuu is in a lighter mood he'll want to talk, he'll be gentle. Today would not be one of those times.

Gakushuu didn't even say anything. He just pushed his chair back and stomped over to Nagisa, grabbing him by the tie with such force Nagisa was sure it was going to rip. Before Nagisa even had a chance to respond he felt his hair being grabbed and suddenly he was pushed up against the wall. _And so it began again._

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 ** _Cliffhanger ending, will Karma find them, review to find out._**

 **So I didn't want Karma to fall madly in love with Nagisa in their first meeting like he seems to do in a lot of stories I read. SO this chapter is basically chronicling their slowly developing friendship. It takes place over the course of about 3 weeks. I hope I characterised Karma well.**

 **Comment and tell me what you think of the story so far. Another warning before the next chapter.. this story will go DARK.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you for all the reviews it makes me want to write more if people are reading this. Yet another warning for upcoming dark themes because I don't want people to say I didn't warn them.**

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 _ **Pâro : The feeling that no matter what you do is always somehow wrong—that any attempt to make your way comfortably through the world will only end up crossing some invisible taboo—as if there's some obvious way forward that everybody else can see but you.**_

Karma ran back the the school at lightening speeds. He may spend a lot of time napping and watching TV, but Karma had been blessed with natural athleticism and had always been able to run incredibly fast (And fight with incredibly strength). The school looked so different of an evening once all the students had left; There was something sinister about seeing this building so desolate when Karma was used to see it swarming with pupils.

Wasting no time, Karma began to look for Nagisa, starting with the obvious places for bullies to extort money (around the back of the school, around the back of the supply cupboard shed, around the back of the archery wing- there was a theme emerging here). But Nagisa was nowhere to be found. The school was completely deserted. Maybe Karma's assumption had been wrong; Maybe he had misinterpreted the situation.. Maybe Nagisa really _had_ just forgotten something back at the school and had ran back to retrieve it.

 _But no._. Karma remembered Nagisa's expression when he got the text. The look in his eyes were shocked. it was clearly something significant, something he'd lied about. _Karma, you promised yourself you'd keep your distance and not get involved with other people's issues. You ALWAYS get yourself into trouble if you try to resolve conflicts_ His logical side was screaming. Karma knew that the best thing he could do for himself now was just accept Nagisa's lie, go home and forget the whole thing. However, his heart wouldn't let him; He kept visualizing Nagisa in pain, Nagisa in trouble. Nagisa crying as someone hurt him.. Nagisa was just so small and helpless, Karma couldn't stand the thought of someone taking advantage of that.

 _Be smart Karma. Just go home. You're always so paranoid and suspicious about everything. Not every situation has some sort of bad explanation. Stop thinking the worst._

Karma ignored the voice, and attempted to pull open the door to the main building.. it was a long-shot but maybe it was still open. Some students must still be in here, Karma realised- he wasn't sure who though. Clubs weren't open this week to prep for exams. Cautiously, aware of the security cameras just outside, Karma stepped into the building. ( _Well, it's not like I'm breaking the rules or anything- I think_ )

 _I'll just quickly look around. If Nagisa isn't here I'll go home. I wont meddle any further. I'll ask him about it tomorrow._

Karma walked along the corridor, listening intently for any sign of life, specifically trying to hear sounds of a fight, or cries of pain (Okay, maybe he was a little paranoid). Karma was just about to turn back, convinced the school was devoid of life when suddenly he heard a cry. _Nagisa!_ was his first thought. That sounded like the cry of someone in pain. Forgetting his doubts, Karma headed towards the source of the noise.

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Nagisa gripped the front of the desk so hard his knuckles were turning white. This hurt like hell, but it felt _so_ good. Gakushuu had a tight, almost bruising grip on him, and Nagisa couldn't help but let out a cry when Gakushuu grabbed a fist full of blue hair. That earned him another tug, and Gakushuu's other hand covered his mouth.

 _"Shut up."_ Gakushuu hissed. Yep. He definitely wasn't in a good mood. There would certainly be no sweet words and no gentleness today. Part of it made Nagisa scared, but another part of him loved it.. when Gakushuu was like this, his anger overtook everything. Nagisa was so overwhelmed with pain and pleasure that he didn't have to think about his own worries. For a few moments he could just _Be. It was ecstasy and torture all at once._

Then suddenly, the sound of someone turning the handle on the door reverberated around the room. Nagisa felt a sick jolt of dread _Oh shit, Oh shit, Oh shit, someone is going to come in and see me. See us. Shit shit shit._ He felt Gakushuu freeze suddenly behind him and hear a sharp intake of breath. But luckily, Gakushuu had locked the door. The intruder, whoever it was, couldn't get in.

 _Should we just ignore them? But they heard us, they know we're in here. What if it's a teacher.. we could get in trouble for ignoring them._ These thoughts raced through Nagisa's mind in the space of a split second, and he was sure Gakushuu was thinking the exact same things. Nagisa felt Gakushuu pull away from him, and he had to bite his lip from crying out in pain.

Nagisa turned around, his heart now hammering for a completely different reason- _If someone found out about me and Gakushuu then everything would be in jeopardy._ Gakushuu picked up a shirt from the floor, tried to fit it on only to find it was Nagisa's much smaller shirt. He cursed and threw the shirt and chucked it at Nagisa before picking up his own.

Nagisa fumbled with his shirt, the adrenaline running through his veins making his hands uncoordinated and shaky, next he stumbled over to his trousers, aware of the knocking at the door. It sounded like a funeral bell. He glanced over at Gakushuu who was buttoning up his shirt, a frantic look in his eyes- The may be the first time Nagisa saw him when he's lost control of a situation. Nagisa also suddenly noticed a large bruise on Gakushuu's lower back, but he didn't have any time to ask about it.

The two of them were both breathing heavily still shook from the sudden interruption.

"Sit down. Act natural." Gakushuu commanded, smoothing down his hair as he went to the door. It had felt as if it had took ages for them to get dressed, but in reality it had only been a few seconds. Nagisa sat on one of the plush chairs in the middle of the room, pushing hair out his face, willing himself to act natural. _If I mess this up, Gakushuu will hate me. I have to act normal._

After straightening his tie a final time, Gakushuu swung open the door, his face completely composed, exposing nothing of the nerves he felt. To his surprise, it wasn't a teacher or staff member standing outside, but rather, another student; He was tall, maybe an inch taller than Gakushuu with a similar lean build. His hair was a vivid shade of red and his eyes were a wolf-like yellow. Karma Akabane. The new transfer student who had a dangerous reputation. What the _hell_ is he doing here? Standing here with that faux-innocent look?

"Can I help you?" Gakushuu asked, forcing his voice to sound a mixture of disdainful and tolerant, like a adult being pestered by an annoying child. Karma looked him up and down with an equally arrogant expression, raising an eyebrow at the slightly crumbled state of his shirt. Then, his eyes looked past Gakushuu for just a second, boring into Nagisa. Nagisa flinched slightly, suddenly feeling as if he were still naked.

"Thought I heard screaming so I came to check it out." Karma said, obviously fake concern in his voice. Nagisa watched from his chair; _What was Karma suddenly doing here?_

"Listen, your new at this school, so I don't _want_ to get you into any trouble." Gakushuu said, clearly a threat despite his smile. "But you really shouldn't be on school property after hours without a good reason and permission from staff. And your certainly shouldn't attempt to trespass into the student council office without knocking. Not to be over-familiar, Akabane, but I'm aware you already have a.. _unfavorable_.. record. We wouldn't want to smear it any more."

It was their first proper conversation, and Karma already hated his smarmy bastard. But Karma could already sense how dangerous this guy could be.

"Noted. Thank you for being so understanding." Karma said, clearly not meaning it at all. "So. Asano. what 'good reason' do you and Shiota have for being here?"

Nagisa was sure he saw Gakushuu's eye twitch. He hated being questioned. "Well, if you insist on prying, I was tutoring Shiota." He said, glaring at Karma. For some reason, Nagisa felt a stab in his heart when Karma called him 'Shiota'. Karma once again tried to meet Nagisa's eye, but he looked away unable to stop his cheek from burning red. He felt ashamed, Karma must _know_ he lied about the reason he went back to the school. He hadn't realized how much he'd appreciated Karma's friendship until he felt as if he were in danger of loosing it. Nagisa was also a little in awe at how fast and how smoothly Gakushuu could lie.

"How kind of you." Karma said shortly. His voice was practically dripping with sarcasm. Although, internally he was kicking himself; _Nagisa is going to think I'm obsessive now. Fuck it. This is dodgy._ Karma let his eyes sweep over the room once over, noticing the lack of paper or books on the table. "You must be doing some interesting tutoring without any work books or even paper. Anyway- I'll leave you to it."

And with that, Karma turned and left. Nagisa let out a shaky sigh of relief.. but internally he still felt in turmoil ( _Why had Karma followed him back here? Had he followed him or what it a coincidence? Had Gakushuu managed to fool Karma?_ ) It seemed Gakushuu was having the same thoughts. He waited until Karma's footsteps disapeared before he spoke again.

"Care to explain what your little friend is doing hanging around here?" Gakushuu asked, turning to glare at Nagisa with a suspicious look. Nagisa flinched. (Although a small part of him was surprised that Gakushuu even knew that Karma was his friend. Gakushuu must take more notice of Nagisa than Nagisa thought he did).

"I- I don't know. I haven't said anything to him, I swear!" Nagisa replied, looking up at Gakushuu with wide honest eyes. Gakushuu wasn't convinced however, he stormed over to _Nagisa_ with a face like thunder. For a terrible moment, Nagisa was sure that he was going to be hit. He winced involuntarily, but instead, Gakushuu directed his anger at the chair next to him, and kicked it so hard one of the legs snapped off.

"You must of said _something_ to lead him back here! You are such an _idiot_! I don't know why I thought I could trust you with even the simple task of keeping your mouth closed!" Gakushuu said, his voice low and dangerous. Those words felt like they were piercing Nagisa's soul. It reminded him so much of how his mother spoke to him. "I suppose you probably don't understand just how _fucked_ we both we would of been if we were caught!"

Nagisa had never heard Gakushuu swear before.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! But I promise, I didn't- I didn't say anything to him!- I don't know why he came here." Nagisa tried to explain. But this didn't sate Gakushuu's anger.

" _Oh_ \- Nagisa Shiota doesn't know something. There's a novelty. How does one manage to go through life with so little intelligence? Tell me. I'm curious." Gakushuu hissed. Now Nagisa was sure he was just being hurtful for the sake of it as a way of letting out his anger. Nagisa knew Gakushuu had to be perfect at all times in most parts of his life. There wasn't a place for 'ugly' emotions like anger when you were a perfect student, so they only person Gakushuu could safely take it out on is Nagisa. Nagisa is Gakushuu's emotional bag. It's a painful role to play.

Nagisa stared straight ahead, this really did remind him of his mother. He bit his tongue to stop himself from retorting and tried to tune out what Gakushuu was saying. Tried to pretend he wasn't there and protect himself from the harsh words coming from someone he admired so much. Honestly, he'd rather Gakushuu hit him rather than this. The sting of a slap is preferable over cruel words.

"Well- do you not have anything to say in your own defense? Are you just going to sit there like a mute?" Gakushuu said, leaning down over. Nagisa had lots of things he'd like to say ( _No I really didn't say anything to Karma? Why are you really in such a bad mood today? How are you going to explain that broken chair tomorrow? How did you get that bruise on your back? Do you really think I'm an idiot?)_ But instead, Nagisa just shook his head and said.

"I'm sorry Gakushuu. I don't know what I did, but you're right, I'm an idiot so it's probably my fault."

"You can be so pathetic at times." Gakushuu said, but his voice sounded more restrained now. Slightly calmer. "Just. Go clean yourself up and go home."

Nagisa stood up, half relieved half disappointed to be leaving. He stopped when he reached the door, trying to think of what to say. He wanted to convey his feelings to Gakushuu but he wasn't sure what he could say that wouldn't make Gakushuu more angry. Instead, he settled for. "Will I hear from you again?"

Gakushuu stared at him for a few seconds before replying. "If I want to see you again I'll let you know."

Once again, he had the upper hand in the relationship and wouldn't relinquish it.

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 **Everyone is pretty messed up in this. Karma gets into trouble at every school, Nagisa has no self esteem or sense of direction, and Gakushuu is so obsessed with being perfect that when he can only really express negative emotions in front of Nagisa.**

 **Review if I should write another chapter. Let me know what you think, and what you want to see from this story.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Debating if I should continue this or not!**

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 **Xeno**

 _n_. the smallest measurable unit of human connection, typically exchanged between passing strangers

Nagisa had hardly managed to sleep at all that night. Thoughts had whirred around his mind for hours ( _What if Gakushuu doesn't want anything to do with me again? What if Karma hates me for lying? Has Karma worked out what's going on between me and Gakushuu? What will he do- will he tell people? Will he be disgusted? Why does Gakushuu feel like he can blame me for everything to make himself feel better? What if it is my fault?_ )

A large part of Nagisa was tempted just to take the day off from school and hid from his troubles. But no. That would be so much worse, and would only delay the inevitable, he'd rather just get this day over with than be forced to prolong the tension, and be left alone at home with his thoughts. Besides. if he did take the day off, that would likely make Karma even more suspicious.

So, feeling almost weak with exhaustion, Nagisa arrived in class that day his eyes puffy and his face pale. As he walked in, he acknowledged Karma with a smile and a wave, trying to act natural. Karma smiled back, although he raised his eyebrow slightly, questioning. If Karma asked why he'd lied, Nagisa would just say that he was embarrassed about needing extra tutoring and didn't want Karma to think he was stupid- _that was convincing, right?_ Part of him hated lying to his friend though.. it just felt so wrong.

Fortunately, Nagisa had arrived a little late that day, so he didn't have time to talk to Karma before homeroom started. Or rather, unfortunately, because now Nagisa had more time to sit and stew and think of worst case scenarios.

It seemed to take an age for the lunch bell to ring, but as soon as it did, Nagisa felt suddenly unprepared. _Calm down, this isn't such a big deal. Stop making it into a big deal. If he asks just tell him about the tutoring, it'll be easy. He doesn't always eat with you anyway, maybe he wont even try to talk to you. Just calm down._

"Hey, Nagisa- It's sunny. Want to go outside for lunch?" Karma asked, suddenly standing above Nagisa, that playful smile still in place. _What did this mean? Karma never asked him to eat outside before. Karma's hiding it well, but Nagisa could sense he had something to ask._

"Sure." Nagisa replied with a smile, and the two of them headed outside together.

* * *

"So, you and the student council president?" Karma said casually, once the two of them were sat outside on the benches, the afternoon sun glaring down on them. The school was quite beautiful really, especially in the sunlighy the grounds were full of lush trees and flowers. But right now, neither of them were focused on the aesthetics of the school. Nagisa began his explanation

"Oh- I'm sorry I lied about it. I was too embarrassed to admit it, but I've not been doing so well in lessons so he's been tutoring me- "

"- Nagisa, I know he's fucking you."

Karma said it so casually it was like he was commenting on the weather. Nagisa choked. He somehow managed to splutter on air itself, and was left in a violent coughing fit ( _Karma did not just say that, did he? I'm imagining things, right?._ Nagisa was vaguely aware that Karma was patting him on the back.

"Karma, is that some sort of joke?" He spluttered, face red from the sudden coughing fit (and because of Karma's accusation). Karma glared at him. His amber eyes suddenly looked so cold, and so full of rage that Nagisa genuinely looked afraid.

"Don't lie to me, Nagisa." Karma commanded. Nagisa couldn't help but shrink away. He neither confirmed or denied what Nagisa said, but rather, simply looked down, his long blue hair hiding his eyes. He bit his lip, and felt his blood run cold.. Would Karma think he was disgusting now? A few moments passed in silence. When it was clear that Nagisa wasn't going to reply, Karma spoke again.

"Listen, Nagisa. Can't say I'm not surprised, but you can sleep with whoever you want, I'm not going to judge you for that." Karma said. Nagisa looked up at him, surprised. That was the last thing he expected Karma to say. "But you aren't letting that Asano kid take advantage of you, are you? Not trying to insult your... lover... but the guy seems like a real asshole."

"He is.. an asshole." Nagisa admitted, remembering how Gakushuu had treated him the last time he saw him. How he'd _always_ treated him. "But there's more to him than that."

Karma raised an eyebrow, giving Nagisa a skeptical expression. "Oh, I'm sure he's also sunshine and rainbows deep, deep down." Karma said. Karma admittedly didn't know Asano at all, but he already didn't like him; He had never seen Asano interact with Nagisa before. It seems to Karma as if Asano was just using him.. It made him furious.

"He always acts perfect in front of everyone but _I'm_ the only one who gets to see him when he's not!" Nagisa tried to explain. He knew his relationship with Gakushuu was twisted, he couldn't believe how fast Karma had managed to work that out. The next thing he knew, he felt Karma grab his wrist and pull the long sleeve of his jumper. Nagisa let out a gasp, as before he could stop it, Karma had exposed the bruises on his wrist. Nagisa pulled his wrists away.

"He did that to you, didn't he?" Karma demanded, his expression suddenly darkening. Nagisa quickly pulled his sleeves back down; He hadn't realised how tightly Gakushuu had been grabbing him yesterday. This was bad.

"I bruise easily. This is really nothing." Nagisa tried to explain. _Oh God.. what would Gakushuu think if he knew Karma knew? He'd kill him for sure._

"He's hurting you. It's not right." Karma said, eyes flashing with rage. "How did you even get involved with someone like him in the first place?"

Well, Kamra already knew the worst of it, there was no use hiding anything.

"In middle school we were in the same music club for a short while. I think he could tell I liked him." Nagisa said, remembering back to when Gakushuu had first approach him. He couldn't believe how many years ago that was now.

"Middle school!? Jesus." Karma said; That was so young. He'd thought Nagisa was completely innocent and pure. The bell rung, signalling the end to that conversation.

"Karma. Please don't let Gakushuu know that you've worked out about us." Nagisa begged. The look in his blue eyes were desperate verging on fearful. "Please don't tell anyone."

That just made Karma's dislike Gakushuu even more. _What had he done to make Nagisa so scared?_ Karma had a lot of questions, and a lot of conflicting feelings, but for now all he could do was go back to class.

* * *

It was evening time, the sun had almost completely set, outside the windows, Karma could see the city illuminated only by street lights. The classroom was completely empty, all except for one person. Nagisa was sat on one of the desks. His blue hair was out of it's usual ties and spilt over his narrow shoulders. His white school shirt looked strangely see-though, revealing the pale skin underneath. The look his blue eyes looked sultry, and the way he was sprawled over the desk was somewhat wanton. As soon as he noticed Nagisa ending, he looked up and smiled.

"Karma. I'm glad you came." He said, standing up from the desk and walking over to karma. He placed a hand to the other's chest. Karma raised an eyebrow.

"What is this?" He asked, confused by Nagisa's sudden touchiness. Nagisa just laughed.

"Come on, we both know you want this." Nagisa said. Karma felt himself blush- why was Nagisa doing this? Was it a joke? and why did it make his heart race but feel warm at the same time. Almost by instinct, Karma put his arms around Nagisa. Nagisa was so much smaller than him, he seemed to fit perfectly in Karma's embrace.

"You're such a little tease." Karma growled, feeling a stirring below his stomach. Nagisa grinned at him, and Karma just let his feelings take over. He grabbed Nagisa by the shoulders and pushed him back against the desk, attaching his mouth to Nagisa's neck.

Nagisa let out a soft moan and gripped onto Karma tighter. This spurred Karma on further, he held Nagisa tighter, and ripped off Nagisa's already thin shirt revealing pale skin. Karma grabbed Nagisa's leg, hooking it around his waist before leaning forward and kissing him hard on the mouth. He ran his hands through Nagisa's hair. it was so soft, and Nagisa tasted so sweet. Karma's hand traveled down, pulling at Nagisa's waistband.

Karma pulled away from the kiss, looking at Nagisa. But suddenly, it wasn't Nagisa that Karma was making out with. Sat in front of him was a boy with strawberry blond hair and sharp violet eyes. Gakushuu Asano.

Karma woke up in bed, his heart racing covered in a thin sheen of sweat breathing heavily. _Holy shit what sort of dream is that? What is wrong with me!?_ He glanced underneath his covers. He'd have to take a cold shower. Damnit.

Ever since he'd found out about Nagisa and Asano yesterday, he couldn't stop thinking about it. ( _What did Nagisa look like when Asano did those things to him? What does it feel like to kiss Nagisa and hold him so tight he bruises? Why did Nagisa chose Asano?)_ He shoved those thoughts to the back of his mind.. He couldn't be thinking about this. He shouldn't get involved. But Karma knew that wouldn't happen.


	5. Chapter 5

**TW this chapter for domestic abuse**

* * *

Four weeks had passed since Nagisa had last been with Gakushuu, and he was beginning to think the other had abandoned him for good. Gakushuu hadn't text him or spoke to him directly since that time. Usually when this happened, Nagisa would get increasingly nervous that Gakushuu would never contact him again. Pretty soon, every time he got a text he would get a rush of hope, then disappointment beyond belief when it wasn't from Gakushuu. His entire life would begin to hinge on the promise of contact.

This time was different. Of course, Nagisa still got anxious worrying if Gakushuu had decided to let him go for good, but the feeling wasn't as intense, it didn't pervade over his entire life as it had done when Gakushuu had ignored him for extended periods of time in the past. Nagisa was fairly certain he knew why he was more relaxed this time; Karma Akabane.

His friendship with Karma helped him forget the feelings of anxiety and worries surrounding Gakushuu. The two of them had evolved from amiable acquaintances to best friends. They spent every break and lunch time together, and even went out with each other after school. Nagisa had never had a friend he could spend so much time with; Even with Kayano, she almost always had an acting job or drama club to go to after school, and Sugino was the same with baseball. Besides. Unlike those two, Karma already knew Nagisa's deepest secret, so he felt as if he had nothing to hide in front of him. It was relaxing.

Part of Nagisa worried they were getting too close however. Karma could be quite touchy-feeley at times, especially when he could tell Nagisa was upset about something. It wasn't anything inappropriate; Just a squeeze of his hand, ruffling his hair, or rubbing his back. Nagisa had slept over at Karma's house a couple of times. Truth be told, it felt so liberating to be out from under his mother's roof. Each time, the two of them had fallen asleep together in Karma's huge king-sized bed and whenever Nagisa woke up, he and Karma were always entangled together (And sometimes.. aroused..)

Nagisa would be lying if he said he wasn't attracted to Karma; Well Karma _was_ attractive with strong facial features and mesmerizing gold eyes. He was tall with a good figure. Not only that, but his personality intrigued Nagisa. Karma was so strong, smart and confident it felt like he could do anything. In some ways it reminded Nagisa of Gakushuu, but there was a difference to Karma's confidence- Gakushuu was a leader who was restrained by the opinion's of others, Karma marched to the beat of his own drum.

Nagisa wasn't stupid. He knew Karma was attracted to him too; Nagisa was good at reading the emotions of others, but to avoid more complications he chose not to acknowledge it. But Nagisa knew that their relationship was on a precarious balance; the tentative mix of attraction and friendship would tip over soon. Part of Nagisa wanted it to. But another part of his was still loyal to Gakushuu; Yes, as Karma had said, Gakushuu was an asshole, he would only interact with Nagisa on his own terms, he just used Nagisa as someone to take out his negative emotions on, was manipulative, was likely seeing other people, had _serious_ control issues and was completely unable to be honest about his feelings. But still. Nagisa didn't want to break Gakushuu's rule about not seeing other people (At least not without talking to him). So for the first time ever, he sent Gakushuu a text message first.

 _If you are free could you please meet me in your office at 5pm tomorrow? We have to talk about the tutoring._

Nagisa sent it Sunday night. He had been typing the message out then deleting it all weekend, just the thought of sending it filled him with anxiety (He knew it wasn't right to be terrified just about sending a text to someone).After spending many hours deliberating and debating with himself, Nagisa finally pressed _Send._ _Well, it's out of my hands now._ Part of Nagisa suspected that Gakushuu would message him back saying he was busy, or even more likely just ignore it. Instead, rather promptly, he got a reply.

 _See you then._

* * *

Nagisa spent the whole of Monday anxious about the meeting after school. Karma could tell something was up with him, but when he asked, Nagisa just said he'd had another argument with his mother. Part of him wanted to tell Karma that he was planning on talking to Gakushuu, on breaking things off. But if he told Karma his plan, then Nagisa would be committed to it, and part of him felt like he wouldn't be able to go through with it.

It didn't help that they had assembly that morning, and Gakushuu was giving a speech as student council president. Nagisa was forced to sit there and watch him and it was impossible not to notice how attractive he was. Nagisa couldn't help but look at what a beautiful colour his eyes were, and how strong his arms looked and he couldn't help but look at Gakushuu's mouth and remember what it felt to be kissed by him. Karma nudged him.

"This speech really that interesting?" Karma whispered. He was aiming for jovial, but Nagisa sensed annoyance and jealousy in his voice. He felt a sudden stab of guilt. Lusting after Gakushuu while sat next to Karma felt _wrong_ somehow. It was no secret between them that Karma didn't approve of Nagisa's relationship with Gakushuu. He said very little about it, but when he did, it wasn't good; He thought that Gakushuu was a manipulative bastard who took advantage of Nagisa. Nagisa was fairly certain the only reason Karma hadn't confronted Gakushuu about it was because Nagisa had begged him to keep the secret.

* * *

Nagisa had enough time to go home before returning to the school for 5pm. The reason he picked such a late time was two-fold; He knew Gakushuu always had _some_ sort of meeting or club to go to after school, and Nagisa knew he'd have to travel home with Karma or else he'd be suspicious if Nagisa stayed back in school.

When he arrived home, thankfully, his mother was still at work. He didn't have time to stay long. He quickly hurried to the bathroom and pried open his mother's medicine cupboard his eyes rested on a small orange bottle. Nagisa grabbed it and pulled off the cap, tipping two blue pills into his hand. He shoved them into his mouth, and used a glass of water on the side of the sink to swallow them.

Valium. He'd need this to relax enough to go through with this. Putting back the bottle so that his mother wouldn't notice, Nagisa hurried back out the door as quick as he'd came. As he hurried back to the train station, Nagisa realized that just four weeks ago he'd never be able to do this; He'd never stand up for himself and make his own decision regarding his life, and decide for himself to end it with Gakushuu instead of letting himself just get dragged along and let Gakushuu make all the decisions regarding their relationship for him. ( _He wouldn't of been able to done this before he met Karma_ )

* * *

It took Nagisa all his emotional strength to get the courage to knock on the door, he wondered if Gakushuu might of stood him up, but no, Gakushuu wasn't like that. Almost as soon as Nagisa knocked, the door swung open and he was suddenly confronted with Gakushuu standing in front of him, his larger figure looming over him. He smiled at Nagisa, but it was cold and false.

"Come in." Gakushuu said, stepping aside and allowing Nagisa to step in. Nagisa did so, walking over to the chair he had sat on last time he was here. He couldn't help but glance at the chair Gakushuu had broke last time; It was very faint, but there was clearly a line were it had been stuck back together. Gakushuu noticed were Nagisa's gaze was.

"Our last encounter was.. regrettable. Would you like some tea?" Gakushuu said, closing the door and walking over to sit opposite Nagisa. He was clearly in a very different mood from last time. Right now he was the calm, business-like Gakushuu who hid all his emotions behind a smile. Nagisa preferred the Gakushuu who shouted and broke chairs. It was at least honest.

"Gakushuu, please don't do this." Nagisa said quietly, looking down. "We've slept with each other too many times to act like we're in a business meeting."

Gakushuu's eyes widened such a fraction in disbelief. Nagisa had _never_ spoke back to him before. "I see hanging around with a dangerous delinquent has been rubbing off on you." Gakushuu said coldly, his voice mocking. But truth be told, Nagisa being assertive had put him off "Well, if you aren't interested in the niceties then tell me why you got me to time out of my busy schedule to meet with me. And don't take all day about it, I have other things to do with my life."

Nagisa sighed. This Valium really was helping him relax enough to say what was on his mind.. although maybe he was starting to get a little dizzy.

"We've been doing this for four years now.." Nagisa said, looking at Gakushuu from underneath his lashes. "I've always liked you as more than just someone to sleep with. But you know that. You've always used the fact I'm devoted to you to your advantage."

"We have an understanding." Gakushuu said after a pause. "What's your point?"

"I've been thinking a lot lately, about why I like you so much. Of course, there was the obvious things; You look good, you're smart, you're confident, you're attractive, everyone _loves_ you." Nagisa listed, fully aware that this would probably swell Gakushuu's already swollen ego even bigger. "All of that drew me to you, but it wasn't the reason I became so devoted."

"Oh?" Gakushuu said, very pointedly, his eyes narrowed. Nagisa took a deep breath before continuing. He was sure what he was going to say next would piss Gakushuu off.

"I think I got so attached to you because a small part of _you_ reminded me of _myself_." Nagisa explained. Gakushuu let out a grunt of annoyance, but Nagisa continued. "Even though you're more gifted and skilled than I'll ever be, I think you're just as trapped as I am- "

"What are you talking about? I'm nothing like you!" Gakushuu interjected, his calm facade thoroughly destroyed. It appears that Nagisa had hit a nerve. But he wasn't done yet.

"I think you are, and you know it! You're trapped by people's expectations, by you're own expectations of yourself. Maybe I thought we could save each other. Maybe that's why I let this go on for so long." Nagisa said, standing up. "But now I see letting you use me isn't helping _either_ of us."

"You're delusional. Get to the point." Gakushuu said, glaring up at Nagisa. He wasn't prepared for this, he never expected Nagisa of all people to stand up to him. He thought Nagisa would always remain like a faithful servant.

"We should end this thing between us. It's not healthy." Nagisa said, blinking back tears that were starting to sting his eyes. He wasn't even sure exactly why he was crying- maybe it was because ending this relationship brought about a culmination of all the emotions he had felt throughout it; _Anger, Sadness, Bitterness, longing, regret_.

A pause followed Nagisa's words.

"I should of seen this coming. This is because of Akabane, isn't it?" Gakushuu said with a biting tone. "I suppose so long as you have _someone_ to fuck you, you're satisfied. I've always known what you are."

"Gakushuu it's not like that!" Nagisa said, shocked. "I'm not just some- some- _whore_."

"That's all you've ever been, Nagisa." Gakushuu said, turning away. "So go off with Akabane and see if I care."

"You're such a hypocrite." Nagisa hissed, now truly angry. His blood lust began to rise unconsciously. "The only person I've ever been with is _you_. But what about you? I _know_ you see other people besides me. I've seen the love-bites on you. _You_ initiated this, and I can tell you had experience. How many people are in your harem besides me? If either of us are a whore, it's you- "

Nagisa was cut off when Gakushuu punched him hard across the face. Nagisa didn't even have time to be surprised before he was knocked off his feet and went flying backwards into one of the chairs. The first thing Nagisa was aware of was the sudden pain across the left side of his face. His vision blurred for a couple of seconds. Nagisa thought he was used to being hit, but Gakushuu was a lot stronger than his mother. Nagisa coughed, tasting blood on in his mouth were he had bit his tongue. Shakily, he looked up. Gakushuu was standing over him, looking equally shocked by his own actions. Slowly, Gakushuu knelt down in front of him, Nagisa flinched away on instinct, but Gakushuu didn't reach out to either help nor harm him, the shock in his eyes had faded, and what replaced it was a dull, emotionless look.

"Don't ever speak to me like that again." Gakushuu commanded. "You should go."

* * *

 **So Gakushuu hit Nagisa. Now I just have to work out how Karma will react when he sees the bruise. Review if i should write another chapter. Let me know what you think should happen.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Thank you for all the reviews, I got more than usual on the last chapter and I think that's a good sign. Knowing people like the story shows me it is worth writing.**

* * *

Nagisa frowned when he once again caught sight of his face in the window of the classroom. Were Gakushuu had punched him, and ugly bruise marred the leftt side of his face. Overnight it had morphed into a mottled purple/red colour that was incredibly noticeable on Nagisa's pale skin, which meant people had been giving him funny glances all morning. He had attempted to use his mother's concealer to hide it, but that had only made it more obvious. Whenever Nagisa's mother hit him, it was never this hard, and never on his face (She wanted to keep him 'pretty'), so it wasn't as if people were used to seeing him covered in bruises. Still, Nagisa knew nobody in this school would care. Well. Except for _one_ person. But _he_ wasn't here yet.

Nagisa thought back to Gakushuu yesterday. He always knew Gakushuu had anger issues, but he'd never seen him loose control to that degree- Gakushuu might be rough when they were intimate, but he'd never _hit_ him before. _Had Nagisa's words really pissed him off that much? Or was he more annoyed that Nagisa had decided to leave him?_

"Nagisa, what happened?" Karma demanded as soon as he arrived in the classroom, for once he'd managed to get there before the first bell. Nagisa blinked, looking up at him with what he hoped was innocent eyes. Part of him wanted to tell the truth, and have Karma be his confident, someone he could trust to tell his woes to, someone who could comfort him. But another part of Nagisa was afraid of his reaction, and an illogical part of himself still felt as if he owed Gakushuu something.

"I fell.." Nagisa lied. "Slipped right down the stairs and whacked my face."

Karma scrutinized Nagisa for a moment before saying. "You know, for someone who lies as often as you do, you think you'd be better at it." He said, his eyes cold. "Nagisa. Tell me the truth."

Nagisa looked up at him, his mind racing _what should he do?_ Without thinking about it, he blurted it out. "I.. went to see Gakushuu yesterday. I broke things off between us. We got into an argument. We both said somethings.." Nagisa said, trying to underplay the situation. Karma was having none of it though, his eyes widened in rage. Karma lent closer to Nagisa, his finger's gently brushing the bruises on his face.

"Gakushuu did this?" Karma asked, his voice low and deadly. He looked moments away from snapping. Before Nagisa had a chance to answer, Karma turned away and stormed out the classroom, his eyes ablaze.

"Karma Akabane! The class is about to start!" Their teacher shouted as Karma headed past. Karma ignored the sound of the bell ringing as he headed out. Nagisa felt a jolt of dread- _what was Karma going to do?_ Ignoring their teacher's cry of ' _Not you too Shiota!'_ Nagisa followed him.

* * *

Gakushuu was sat in class, his eyes fixed on a book in front of him. He wasn't _really_ reading it however, but having a book in front of your face was the best way to indicate to people that _No_ , you didn't want to talk. His followers knew at this point not to bother him when he wasn't in the mood. The events of yesterday spun through his mind.. _I'm ending up just like him._

The bell rung indicating the start of class. The door swung open, Gakushuu expected their teacher to walk in, but instead, standing there with a face like thunder was none other than Karma Akabane. _What the hell is he doing here?_

Before Gakushuu could even ask him, Karma stormed over, wordlessly furious until he was suddenly right in front of Gakushuu's desk, looming over him. In an instant, Karma had raised his fist, and hit Gakushuu as struck as he could.

It was only because of years of martial arts training that Gakushuu managed to block the hit with his forearm. But Karma was still strong enough to knock him off his chair. The rest of A class gasped as Gakushuu whacked his head against the desk behind him as he careened into the floor. Gakushuu didn't even have a chance to pull himself off the ground before Karma sat on top of him, grabbed him by the collar, and punched him across the face. Gakushuu's vision blurred for a moment, he spat out a wad of blood out of his mouth. He looked up at Karma who was grinning, with eyes full of blood lust.

"If you ever touch Nagisa again, I'll kill y- " Karma started to say, but was cut off when Gakushuu punched him across the face twice in quick succession. Gakushuu was vaguely aware of people in the class screaming, and Nagisa Shiota standing at the door screaming for them to ' _stop_ '.

They didn't stop, however. Gakushuu raised his fists to hit Karma again, only for the other to grab his wrists. Both of them weren't thinking about the consequences, only about how much they wanted to smash the other's face in. They probably would of done too if Nagisa hadn't pulled a water bottle out of his bag and poured if over the two of them. Suddenly, they both felt themselves being covered with cold liquid. That was enough to shock them out of their violent fight.

"Just stop." Nagisa said, his eyes teary. Before either Karma or Gakushuu could reply however, the teacher walked over, looking horrifed.

"What on earth is going on here!?"

* * *

Both Karma and Gakushuu had been hauled away to the disciplinary office by the teacher. Nagisa had been forced to return to his classroom as if nothing had happened. All day, everyone from D class attempted to get Nagisa to spill about the fight between Gakushuu and Karma since he'd seen it first hand. Fights were rare in this school, and one involving the top pupil was simply unheard of. It was scandalous. Nagisa simply dodged the questions, pretending he hadn't been able to _really_ see it, and _no, he had no idea what the fight was about._

It was torturous having no idea what sort of trouble the other two were getting in too. Nagisa was certain Gakushuu would get off lightly, since he wasn't technically the one who started it, he had a perfect record and he was universally loved by teachers (Although he was sure that the fight affecting his 'perfect' reputation at all would be a huge blow to Gakushuu, and he'd probably agonize about it.). It was Karma that Nagisa was truly scared for. With his reputation, there was a good chance he could get expelled for pulling a stunt like that. Nagisa had already grown attached to Karma, he didn't want to have to see him leave now. Besides? Were would Karma go- there weren't any schools left within ten miles that would take him. The only leverage Karma has was his good grades, since the school tended to favor the smart pupils.

He hoped and prayed that Karma wouldn't be dragged over the coals for this. Nagisa didn't want to loose another friend. He didn't want to loose Karma.

* * *

Karma had a problem controlling his anger. He knew this, he'd been that way as long as he could remember. In general, Karma was laid back and relaxed, he didn't let other people trying to tear him down bother him, in fact, it amused him most of the time. But he had a limit. Karma was hardly ever a 'little bit angry',when he was pissed off, he was filled with uncontrollable rage. He went from 0-100 in 2 seconds, and by the time he'd managed to calm himself down, he'd already lashed out, and he had to face the consequences for his actions.

One moment he saw Nagisa's bruised face, the next he was in a fist fight with Gakushuu Asano in front of the whole class. Karma could kick himself! He thought he was getting better at controlling his anger, but something about seeing Nagisa hurt made him spiral out of control once again. _If only he'd kept his cool, if only he'd been smart._ He could of easily got revenge against Gakushuu without getting himself into trouble. He could of played a prank on him, he could of publicly humiliated him. _Heck, he could of even just went and punched him when nobody was looking._

Right now, he was in the disciplinary office, knelt on the hard wooden floor. Next to him was Gakushuu, looking about as pissed off as Karma felt, although Karma couldn't help but be slightly satisfied to see a bruise forming around the edge of Gakushuu's eye. _Good, not so pretty now, are you?_ From what he'd heard of Gakushuu, this was probably the first time he'd been in trouble with the school _doubly good._

Sat in front of them behind a wooden desk were three stern faces; The head of year (A severe looking woman with long black hair), A counselor (short and balding with round glasses), and Chairman Asano himself. This was the first time Karma had seen Chairman Asano in person. He was an elusive leader, constantly away from the school on business trips and meetings. Yet, he still managed to keep an iron-fisted rule over the place, were students and teachers universally revered and feared him. Even Karma had to admit that the man was intimidating; He was tall with a broad figure and sharp features, everything from his hair to his uniform was impeccably neat. Although he was conventionally attractive, there was something sinister about him that Karma couldn't quite place.

He didn't look all that much like his son, expect for the eyes; They both had the same sharp violet eyes. _Speaking of familial bonds.. how was it fair that Gakushuu's own father got to be one of the judges for their punishment?_

"It's clear what happened here. That Akabane boy attacked Asano for no reason like a wild animal." The Counselor stated after only a moment's deliberation. The look in his eyes was one of disdain. "Akabane already has a blood-stained history of violence. We shouldn't tolerate _his_ kind at our school. I say he should be expelled here and now."

The head of year nodded in agreement. Karma couldn't resist the urge to roll his eyes; The hadn't even made any mention of Asano. Typical.

"Let us not be hasty." The Chairman said, his voice demanding absolute attention. "We haven't asked for Akabane's version of events. Akabane, why did you hit Asano?"

Despite the oppressive atmosphere in the room, Karma didn't allow himself to show any signs of nerves. He looked the Chairman straight in the eye and spoke in a calm, clear voice.

"It was revenge. Because Asano hit my friend. Nagisa Shiota." Karma said. He was careful about how he worded it though, he had no problem telling the teachers that Gakushuu had hit Nagisa, but he didn't exactly want to tell them why. He was sure that Nagisa wouldn't want his sex life revealed to the school staff, and if it were revealed that they had been intimate on school grounds, it would likely mean they'd been breaking several rules. As tempting as it was to humiliate Gakushuu by revealing his dirty secrets to his father and the other members of staff, it wasn't worth getting Nagisa into trouble also.

Out of the corner of his eye, Karma could see Gakushu scowl at his words. Instantly, the counselor and head of year jumped to the golden boy's defense.

"What lies!"

"Asano would never do such a thing."

The Chairman however, remained silent, his eyes boring into Karma intently. Somehow, his silence was louder than words. He stayed like that few a good few seconds before turning his attention to his son. "So, Asano, is this true?"

"Of course not." Asano said, through gritted teeth. Karma could tell he was on edge though, just a mention of what he'd done to Nagisa had thrown him.

"You can check the bruises on Nagisa's face if you don't believe me." Karma said slyly.

"That has nothing to do with me, Akabane." Gakushuu retorted, turning to glare at Karma, his violet eyes practically flashing with rage.

"Silence." The Chairman demanded. Although he hadn't even raised his voice, the effect was immediate, and both boys shut up instantly. Karma was sure he saw Gakushuu wince. "I will not have childish bickering in my presence. Now. For your punishment..."

* * *

When Karma finally arrived back home after spending the rest of his school day in isolation, he was shocked to see a small boy with long blue hair sat on waiting on his doorstep. Nagisa. His pale skin and light blue hair looked almost luminous against the darkness of the evening, he was still wearing his uniform and carrying his bag, he must of came straight from school. The sight was enough to momentarily take Karma's breath away.

 _What was he doing here? Is he not mad at me? I thought he'd want nothing to do with me after seeing my violent side._

As soon as Karma stepped close to him, Nagisa perked up, ripping his eyes away from the floor and looking up at the other.

"Karma, you're finally back." He said, sounding a mixture between pleased and wary. "I've been waiting- You hadn't been answering your phone all day."

"Sorry, I was kept in the isolation room. Didn't get much of a chance." Karma admitted, stepping past Nagisa to unlock the door.

"Well?" Nagisa said.

"Well what?" Karma replied, as he pushed the door open, although he already had a good idea of what the question was going to be.

"What was your punishment?" Nagisa asked tentatively, as if he was scared of the answer

"Being in isolation for all of today, a weeks suspension, and I have to write an apology essay to my teacher." Karma said nonchalantly, as if being in such trouble was no big deal. "Honestly, I expected a lot worse- "

Karma was cut off when Nagisa suddenly stood up and hugged him tightly. Karma's heart raced as arms wrapped around his waist, and he felt Nagisa's smaller body pressing into him. Despite himself, he felt blood rushing to his cheeks.

"Thank goodness." Nagisa said as he hugged Karma. "I thought you'd be permanently excluded. Promise me you'll never do anything that stupid again! I want to graduate with you, do you hear me?"

Karma felt a strange warm feeling fill his chest. He was sure Nagisa would be scared of him, but instead, for the first time ever, there was someone who cared about Karma's well being. It was an unfamiliar feeling, but it was _nice_. Tentatively, he wrapped his arms around Nagisa's small frame. "Fine. I promise." He chuckled. "As tempting as it would be to punch Gakushuu in the face again."

"Good." Nagisa said, looking up at Karma with those impossibly blue eyes. Their gazes met, and there was a moment of silence as a ripple of electricity seemed to pass between them. Drew in by an unknown force, Karma felt unable to resist. He leaned down and kissed Nagisa on the lips.

There was a second of deliberation, were Nagisa's eyes widened in shock, a million thoughts passed through his head, but instead of listening to them, he decided just to allow his feelings to take over. He kissed back, bringing his arms up Karma's back to run his hands through his hair.

A primal urge took over Karma, with perhaps slightly more force than necessary, he pushed Nagisa back against the wall, one hand pinning Nagisa's wrist, the other cupping Nagisa's face. He pulled away, from Nagisa's mouth, not leaving a moment's pause before he began kissing Nagisa's neck. The soft moan that Nagisa made sent a thrill of arousal through Karma.

"W- Wait." Nagisa gasped, pushing Karma away lightly. "We need to go inside."

Karma didn't need to be told twice.

* * *

 **The End!**

 **No, just kidding. This story will not be that straightforward or that simple and happy. There's still a lot more to come.**

 **Review for more! Tell me what you thought of this chapter**


	7. Chapter 7

**So you remember all the trigger warnings I put at the start of the story? Mostly just for this chapter TW for child really bad abuse, mentions/ implications of rape, underage relationship and suicide attempt. If you know you will be upset by this please do not read.**

 **Thanks for all the reviews guys they keep me going**

* * *

Nagisa woke up when rays of sunlight shone through the crack in the curtains onto his face. He blinked, opening his eyes and inspecting his surroundings. He was in a large room, lying on a queen-size bed; Karma's house. Lying next to him was Karma himself. The red head was asleep, his red hair falling into his face and his arms wrapped around Nagisa's waist. Nagisa felt his heart warm _Karma looked so sweet when he was asleep._ A few bruises were now visible on his face from his fight with Gakushuu. _We match_ Nagisa thought, smiling slightly.

Being with Karma was very different from being with Gakushuu. Karma was a lot less experienced than Gakushuu for one, but he was also gentler as if he were still afraid of breaking him. But Nagisa was sure they'd be able to work on that. The best difference was that unlike Gakushuu, Karma actually aloud Nagisa to touch him. It was so nice to be able to initiate kisses and hold Karma tight. They hadn't gone _all the way_ last night, but it had been just enough too be able to kiss and hold each other and fall asleep in each other's arms.

As blissful as he was feeling, the paranoid part of Nagisa felt as if this was too good to be true; _Why would someone as smart and talented as Karma be interested in someone like him? Was he just being used for sex again like he was with Gakushuu? Was Nagisa okay with that?.. wait they hadn't even had sex last night. What if Karma gets freaked out by what happened last night.. He didn't even know that Karma was gay. Was Karma gay? Or was he Bi? What about Gakushuu. Was Nagisa himself gay or Bi? Why didn't he know his own sexuality. Did it matter?_

Nagisa was pulled out of his thoughts when his phone suddenly started ringing; Who would be ringing him now? It was 7.30 am in the morning, the sun was hardly up! Quickly, so Karma wouldn't be woken up by his ringtone, Nagisa de-tangled himself from the other's arms before jumping out of bed and rushing to his bag and pulling his phone out, answering it.

" ** _Nagisa! Get home right now!_** " His mother screeched down the phone. Nagisa was so startled he almost dropped his phone. Instantly, his happy mood was shattered and replaced with dread.

"M- mum! what's wrong? has something happened?" Nagisa asked, gripping the phone tighter. What had he done to piss her off now? He'd text to let her know he was staying over at Karma's place and she seemed fine with it.

"I've just been speaking to Tanaka-san!" Mother said, (Tanaka-san being their nosey next door neighbor who's obnoxious son was in Nagisa's class). " _She_ said that Karma Akabane is a dangerous delinquent. _She_ said he attacked a boy in school yesterday. Not only that, but he's already been excluded from countless school's before. How could you be hanging around with such a low-life! You're putting yourself in danger! Do you not care about your own mother at all? How do you think I'd feel if something happened to you? After all I've sacrificed for you, this is how you treat me?"

"- Wait, Mum, it's not like that!" Nagisa tried to explain. Yes, Karma had done all the things she'd accused him of, but he wasn't _dangerous._ He could already visualise his mother at the other end of the phone, her face red with rage, and her eyes wide and wild like a viscous animal, stomping her feet around their flat.

"I don't want to here it!" She snapped. "You better be home in ten minutes or else- or else I don't know what I'll do!"

"Mum, wait!" Nagisa cried out, but it was too late, she'd already hung up. Filled with fear for what could happen, Nagisa dashed about the room, quickly pulling his shirt and trousers back on (He'd only been wearing his underwear to bed), in his haste, he was tripping over and probably actually taking longer than if he were calm.

"Nagisa? what's up?" Karma asked sleepily from the bed, giving Nagisa a confused look with bleary tired eyes. He must of only just woken up. He sat up in bed, stretching. "Are you leaving now?"

"Sorry Karma.. It's a family emergency." Nagisa said breathlessly. Already fully dressed with his bag slung over his shoulder, Nagisa lent down and kissed Karma suddenly on the mouth before heading out the door. "I'll text you!"

Karma could only watch him go, sleep dulling his reactions. He felt strangely disappointed that Nagisa had already left, but more importantly, was the other okay? He'd seemed incredibly flustered, bordering on frightened. _What on earth had happened?_

* * *

The first thing Gakushuu wanted to do when he woke up was text Nagisa and arrange a meeting, but then he realised with a resounding thump of disappointment that meeting with Nagisa was no longer an option. Letting out a frustrated sigh he sat up, in his bed, his head pounding from lack of sleep. Yesterday had been awful. before first period he had managed to ruin his spotless school record and tarnish his perfect reputation. His classmates and teacher had saw him _fighting_ like a wild animal. He'd gotten a _detention_ (Sure, he'd gotten off lightly compared to Akabane who had been suspended, but that wasn't the point!). _Speaking of Akabane, why had Nagisa picked Akabane over him? Was it because he was stronger? Because he wasn't afraid to do what he wanted no matter the social repercussions? (Because he could tell Gakushuu was poison?)._

Gakushuu's phone buzzed, he picked it up seeing a slew of messages from both classmates and other kids from school- some not even in his year. Scrolling through, almost all of them said pretty much the same thing; 'Asano _are you okay?' 'You shouldn't of gotten in trouble! It was all Akabane's fault', 'You were so brave'._ Gakushuu knew to keep up his 'perfect' facade he'd have to answer them as some point, thanking them for their concern and assuring them that everything was completely fine.

Reluctantly, Gakushuu dragged himself out of bed, wincing as his body ached with pain at his every movement. He stopped in the middle of the room when he caught sight of himself in the mirror. He looked like a mess. His normally neat strawberry blond hair was sticking up like a bird's nest, his violet eyes were tired and a purplish bruise showed prominently on the right side of his face right next to his eye. _Fucking Akabane_. Gakushuu's eyes traveled lower down his own reflection, stopping when he saw an angry looking burn mark that marred his bare chest from the left side of his collar bone down to his naval. It was a furious red color with a few traces of white were the skin was beginning to peel. Tentatively, he pressed it, hissing in pain when it predictably began to sting. Unable to stop himself, memories of how he had acquired that injury the day before filled his head.

 _The drive home had been nerve racking. Normally, Gakushuu would walk home himself since the Chairman always left the school later than he did (Even though Gakushuu himself stayed pretty late after school for student council) but today, after the disciplinary meeting was over, the Chairman had commanded Gakushuu to 'wait for him'._

 _Gakushuu was sure his father enjoyed watching him squirm in his seat as the man read his news paper. Gakushuu knew he'd messed up, possibly worse than he ever had done since he was born, he knew his father was beyond furious with him and he'd have to endure his wrath as soon as the two of them were alone together. Gakushuu liked to act strong, but the truth was, his father still had the ability to terrify him._

 _When they arrived home, part of Gakushuu wanted to hop out the car and run away, but he knew that would only be delaying the inevitable. He'd tried running away from his father when he was younger, it only ever made the punishment worse. He hardly heard his chauffeur's farewell as he stepped out the car. Walking towards the front door of his house made Gakushuu feel like he was walking towards the execution stand with the hang man's noose waiting for him._

 _"Is something the matter? You look pale." The Chairman stated as he opened the door. He had a wide grin on his face, and his eyes were full of sadistic delight as he looked at his son._

 _"I'm fine, sir." Gakushuu replied, forcing himself to keep his voice even as he walked in. If there was one thing his father hated it was weakness. Gakushuu knew he'd only make things worse if he acted as scared as he felt. It would just piss the man off even more, if that was possible._

 _"If you say so. I think we ought to have a chat about what happened today, don't you agree? Lets go to my office." The Chairman said. He said it so cordially as if it were simply a friendly suggestion rather than a death sentence._

 _"Yes sir." Gakushuu replied stiffly, following his father to his office like a zombie. The Asano family house was very large and grand, but there was an emptyness to it; The layout was stylish but neutral and it was completely devoid of family photos. This could be anyone's house, but to Gakushuu their house seemed particularly hollow today._

 _As soon as Gakushuu entered the office, the Chairman closed and locked the door after him and suddenly the relatively large room felt too small and too enclosed to Gakushuu. He wanted to break the door down and escape, but he knew standing his ground was the only real option. Noticing his discomfort, the Chairman simply smirked._

 _"I want this to be a productive discussion. You have a tendency to try and leave when you feel under pressure." The Chairman explained as he took a seat behind his desk. That was a polite way of saying 'Sometimes Gakushuu tried to run out the door and escape when he felt genuinely in danger. Last time he'd made it to the front door before his father had dragged him back by the ear._

 _"I wont do that this time." Gakushuu assured. Why was his father keeping up with this 'cool and collected' act. Part of Gakushuu wanted him to just end the anticipation and stop, but the other part of him was afraid of that. He kept waiting for the man to snap, but instead, his father switched on the small kettle he kept by his desk._

 _"Tea or coffee?" The Chairman asked as if this were a polite business meeting. Gakushuu shook his head._

 _"You didn't bring me in here to offer me beverages. We're both busy so I suggest you get to the point." He said pointedly. He knew being snarky when he'd already pissed off his father wasn't exactly the safest thing to do but he'd passed the point of no return now._

 _"Impatient as always I see." The Chairman chuckled, before all mirth disappeared from his eyes leaving behind only pure ice. "I made a point to observe Nagisa Shiota today. He really did have a bruise, Akabane was telling the truth, you had hit him."_

 _"That isn't true! Akabane must be mistaken! Someone else must of done it- " Gakushuu started to explain._

 _"You've always been a terrible liar." The Chairman said coldly, cutting him off. He was done with all the fake niceties now. The kettle clicked off as it finished boiling, but the Chairman ignored it. "You're nothing but an untrained mutt if you're going around getting into fist fights with your classmates and your letting people find out. I don't know what's worse, you fighting in class, or the fact you couldn't even win a fight against someone in your own age group. You're so weak it's pathetic."  
_

 _"If the teacher hadn't intervened I could of- "_

 _"Your excuses only go further to prove what a weakling you are." The Chairman growled. "So tell me, Asano, what good reason could you have possibly had for assaulting Nagisa Shiota?"_

 _('Well father, I've been sleeping with him since second year of middle school, and he was breaking it off with me. He called me a whore and it made me loose my temper so I punched him') Yeah. No. That wasn't an appropriate answer._

 _"I've already told you I didn't assault him. I hardly know the boy! Akabane's words aren't to be trusted, he's a future prison inmate." Gakushuu growled, looking his father in the eye. The Chairman waited all of two seconds before raising his hand and slapping Gakushuu hard across the face. Even though part of him was expecting it, the force still nearly knocked him off his feet. He blinked back water in his eyes as his cheek stung,_

 _"Asano, if you're going to lie to me, do try and at least make it convincing." The Chairman said, his voice still threatening. "Let's try this again. What possible reason could you have for hitting Nagisa Shiota? What possible justification could there be for you being stupid enough to spark off a chain of events that lead to you fighting in front of your classmates like a wild dog. Needless to say your reputation is in tatters because of this, nobody will ever respect you as a fellow human now, let alone as a leader. Go on. Tell me. I'm waiting."_

 _"I'm not lying." Gakushuu replied through gritted teeth. As expected, the Chairman slapped him again, harder this time. Gakushuu managed to move with it to lessen the impact, but it still hurt. What was worse than the pain though, was the humilation. It was the feeling of weakness that accompanied each blow, the knowledge that he didn't have the strength to stop it. He felt every bit as weak and pathetic as his father told him he was. He hated it. You would think after 17 years of being slapped around by this man, he'd be used to it, but every blow was still as horrid as the first._

 _"Last chance, Asano." The Chairman threatened. The steam from the kettle was billowing out from behind him, making him look even more menacing. Gakushuu took in a deep gulp of breath. He hated that his father prolonged his torture like this. But he had to stay calm for as long as he could._

 _"I did not lay a finger on Nagisa Shiota. I have no possible reason for doing that. I could make up a reason if that would make you feel better?" Gakushuu said, his voice shaking just slightly giving away his fear. Gakushuu was expecting another slap, or perhaps a blow to the head, or a punch to the stomach. He was mentally preparing for it. What he didn't expect was for his father to pick up the kettle and casually as could be, pour the boiling water down Gakushuu's front._

 _It took a second for him to feel it as the water seeped in through his shirt. The next thing he knew, his skin was burning and he was in white hot agony. For the first time since he'd entered the office, Gakushuu lost himself to the pain and forgot his father was even there as he let out a cry of pain. he sunk to his knees, quickly ripping his shirt off himself as the material sodden in boiling water stuck to his skin. Oh God this hurt! This hurt so badly!_

 _He looked up, seeing his father looking down at him with a satisfied smirk, the look in his eyes completely unhinged. "You should learn to lie more believably." He said, sounding only amused as his son writhed in pain beneath him. "You continue to be such a disappointment to me. I demand perfection yet you can't even muster up mediocrity. Tell me, for what purpose were you born? Were you born to be a pathetic failure? because thus far in your miserable life, that's all you've been."_

 _Gasping in pain, Gakushuu looked up at him. After all this time, those words still felt like a kick to the gut; Part of him wanted to scream at his Dad, tell him how hard he constantly worked, how he had the best grades in the school, he was student council president, was star player on the football team, had won basically every award the school had to offer and had even more created for him. Surely that was enough, right? Surely his father should acknowledge him now! What more did he need to do? But he kept his mouth shut, because he knew no matter what he said, it wouldn't make his father be proud of him. He couldn't make his father love him._

 _"Look at you. crouching down there feeling sorry for yourself. You're so pathetic!" The Chairman hissed, standing closer until his shoes touched his son's. "You are my son! I created you.. what reason do you have for existing if you can't even live up to my expectations?"_

 _Gakushuu forced himself to stand up. "Let me leave.. I need to run this under cold water. You're a maniac" He said. He didn't even want to look at his chest, it felt as if it were blistering. He turned towards the door. Screw not running away, he'd kick this thing down! He thought desperately._

 _"Don't avoid the question!" The Chairman snarled, grabbing Gakushuu by the shoulders. Instinctively he tried to pull away. "I created you, so you should exist for no reason other than to please me. Your birth killed my wife; She belonged to me, she was mine and you killed her. That is something you will have to atone for by dedicating the rest of your life to me, do you understand?"_

 _Gakushuu stopped fighting at the mention of his mother, and an old guilt coursed through his veins. Logically, he knew he wasn't responsible for his mother's death- he couldn't help being born. But after being told since he was a child he was responsible for his mother's death, the guilt was ingrained in his psyche. He felt repugnant, like an unlovable monster. On some level, Gakushuu knew the reason he sought so much attention and admiration from others was to cover up the deep gaping hole in his heart._

 _The Chairman grinned when Gakushuu stopped fighting. He pulled him close into something that resembled a hug, one hand running through Gakushuu's hair. "A lesser man than me would of smothered you in your crib for what you've done. But not me. I'm forgiving." The Chairman spoke in a low voice into Gakushuu's ear. "I let you live with me, I fed you, clothed you, taught you, allowed you to attend my school. All I ask in return is that you attempt to atone for your sins by doing everything I say."_

Gakushuu wanted to forget what had happened next, but the evidence was all over his body from the finger-print shaped bruises on his hips to the hickeys on his inner thigh. Just looking at them made Gakushuu feel disgusted and filled with fear once again. He _hated_ that he was so weak that another man, his own father, could do whatever he wanted with him. Just use him like a rag doll. Like a whore. Gakushuu had attempted to fight back, he always did, every time. Every time it was futile. He couldn't _not_ think about what had been done to him, how weak and dirty it made him feel. Unconsciously, he scratched his forearms as he thought. Gakushuu had been knocked around and berated by his father for as long as he could remember, but this particular type of torture had begun when he was 13.

Gakushuu had been confused, he knew it was _wrong_ but there was no way to stop it; All grown ups were on Dad's side. He told his teacher in first grade about how his father had dunked his head under the water in the bath tub until he'd passed out because he'd gotten 6/10 on a spelling test. The teacher scolded him for lying and told his father what Gakushuu had said which got him into even more trouble.

At 13, Gakushuu's life began to spiral out of control. He managed to keep up his grades and a facade of strength, somehow, mostly by constantly lying to himself. But inside, he was tearing himself apart, he no longer wanted to eat, he constantly felt on the verge of tears, he began to think of ways to escape this situation, and sometimes jumping in front of a train seemed like the most effective. Being used like that made him feel like he had no control, no agency and that made him scared, which soon turned into anger. The only way he could feel less powerless was to have more power over others. he became obsessed with being the 'leader'.

A few months later, Gakushuu first encountered Nagisa. He was a boy, but he looked at Gakushuu the same way girls did. It didn't take long for Gakushuu to work out that Nagisa was weak. He was pushed around by bullies and other classamates. His own mother kept him at her beck and call through the phone (Apparently she didn't even let him cut his own hair). He was weak-willed and had no agency. Exactly the traits Gakushuu hated about himself. But seeing them in another person made him feel _better._ It meant he could focus all that hatred he felt towards himself on someone else.

It wasn't long before Gakushuu initiated a relationship with Nagisa. or perhaps 'arrangement' would be a more accurate description of what they had between them. Gakushuu did to Nagisa was his father did to him. By taking control over Nagisa, he felt as if he was more in control of his own life. Suddenly, 'Nagisa' was the weak one, not him. It gave Gakushuu a power boost having a person he could touch but couldn't touch him, someone who was there for Gakushuu's convenience whenever _he_ wanted him. Gakushuu took out all his anger and frustration at his situation out on Nagisa. _But I'm not like my father_ He told himself _Because everything me and Nagisa do it consensual. He's acting like my slave because he wants to! Because people want to worship me! Because I am all powerful!_

But that was gone now, Gakushuu remembered with a sigh, glaring at his reflection in the mirror. He kept telling himself Nagisa was replaceable commodity, but being without him still bothered him. Knowing Nagisa had picked someone else over him filled Gakushuu with humiliation and anger ( _What has Akabane have that I don't?)._ The self hatred and anger bubbled overas dark, intrusive thoughts filled Gakushuu's head ' _Look at what else you managed to fuck up! No wonder Nagisa isn't interested in you any more, even he can probably sense how weak you are.. Didn't he say he knew the two of you were alike? Didn't he say you were a whore? He's seen right through you now. Him and Akabane are probably laughing about how pathetic you are right this very moment_! _You hit Nagisa too- you like to think you're different from your father but your not, you're just as prone to violence as he is when you don't get your own way. His toxic blood runs through your veins, even if he dies you'll never escape him, he's a part of you. Can't run away from your genetics, you're poison just like he is_ '

Without even thinking about it, Gakushuu drew back his fist and punched the mirror as hard as he could. His reflection shattered before his eyes. The sudden pain of impact managed to snap him out of the trap of those thoughts. He looked at his fist, now dripping lightly with blood _Well, that was stupid._ The shards of mirror scattering the room suddenly drew his attention. They looked sharp, sharp enough, for example, to slit your wrists with.

Part of Gakushuu was tempted, if only because having a son commit suicide would be a dreadful scandal for his father to face. But no. He wouldn't make things that easy for his father; He wanted to be worse than a minor inconvenience towards that man when he got his revenge. Besides, he was busy today; Work to do, emails to answer. Shoving his feelings to the back of his mind, Gakushuu unlocked his door and stepped out into the world.

* * *

When Nagisa arrived in the house, he could hear the sound of the bath being filled with water, and he was instantly filled with dread. Without even bothering to drop his bag or take of his shoes, Nagisa ran to the bathroom, slamming through the door. What met him was a familiar sight; Something he'd seen before whenever he'd upset his mother and it still filled him with as much horror as it had done the first time.

His mother was immersed in the bathtub, fully clothed, her dark blue hair floating above her. What terrified Nagisa even more though, was the red color of the bathwater. Blood. Nagisa didn't wait a moment, he grabbed his mother and pulled her out of the bath, tears filling his eyes. Her skin was flushed, showing Nagisa that she hadn't been under the water for long; In fact, she probably only dipped her head under when she heard Nagisa coming in through the door. The cuts on her wrist were shallow and superficial. Nagisa took a sigh of relief; his mother was safe. This was all for show to make him feel bad. Despite knowing that, it worked brilliantly.

"Mother, what were you thinking?" Nagisa said, his voice shaky with adrenaline, his arms still around her.

"Can you blame me?" She hissed, her wet hair sticking to her face, making her look like a vindictive water demon. "You clearly don't care about me! You just go and put yourself in danger without a thought for _my_ feelings. You're all I have Nagisa, and if you don't appreciate me, then what's the point of me even staying alive! I can tell by your actions that you don't care about me any more!"

"That isn't true, I love you mum- please get out of the bath and let me patch you up." Nagisa said honestly. Guilt was eating away at him. The 'suicide attempt' was a card his mother often pulled when she felt as if Nagisa had done something she disproved of. It worked every time, Nagisa felt ashamed for how he'd acted, and too guilty to defy her. It was a unique way of using fear to control her son.

"If you love me then why do you treat me so awfully?" His mother sobbed, grabbing onto his wrist tightly, tears filling her eyes. Even though Nagisa knew she'd never had any intention of actually killing himself he was still wracked with guilt. He knelt down, hugging her, not caring that her wet clothes were getting his uniform damp.

"I'll be better mum, I promise." He said, desperate for this punishment to be over. He felt his mother pat his head just a little too hard.

"Then I don't want you to associate with that delinquent Karma Akabane ever again." She commanded. "If you love me, you can do that."

* * *

 **Everyone catch that subtext? I gave some more info into the background of Nagisa and Gakushuu's relationship. And guess what? It's even more fucked up than it was first portrayed as. I made Gakushuu seem like the bad guy at the start of this fic, and while it's true he was an asshole towards Nagisa, that's mostly because of how he himself has been treated. Gakushuu basically has a major inferiority/superiority complex, since his father treats him like dirt, but everyone else worships him.**

 **I didn't want to write in too much detail about what is happening to Gakushuu because nobody wants to read that and i certainly don't want to write it, but I think everyone catches the gist.**

 **In the original Assassination classroom, I know Gakuho is a villain but he has a good heart deep, deep down. In this story he's strait up concentrated evil I wil be the first to admit that my Gakuho is pretty much a caricature of the original. Hiromi is also more manipulative than she was in the original. She has no problem traumatizing her son over a petty argument. Of course, she has her own demons and personal issues that make her so incredibly possessive and clingy over Nagisa, and willing to go to such lengths, but that doesn't make it any easier on Nagisa. Her forcing so much guilt onto him and controlling him to such a degree is why Nagisa allowed himself to be in a one-sided controlling relationship with Gakushuu, and why he was so easily infatuated by any sort of attention.**

 **Also if you think it's disturbing that Nagisa and Gakushuu have been in such a messed up relationship from such a young age then good, it's meant to be disturbing. Nothing that happened to either of them is meant to be shown as positive. They both used each other as a maladaptive coping strategy.**

 **Anyway please review. Sorry this got dark but I did warn you guys. let me know what you thought.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Thank you for all the reviews. I was nervous about putting the last chapter out because of how dark the content was, but I'm glad people stuck around anyway. That should probably be the darkest chapter of the whole story, although this chapter is by no means sunshine and rainbows! Hope you enjoy!**

* * *

Walking to school and knowing that Karma wouldn't be there made Nagisa's heart heavy, and each footstep feel especially laborious. Part of Nagisa knew it was stupid; He had only known Karma for about a month. He shouldn't be _this_ attached already. But he was. All weekend Nagisa had been daydreaming of Karma's kiss and Karma's embrace. After his mother's suicide attempt on Friday, the rest of the weekend had just been walking on egg shells, doing whatever he could to ensure his mother's already fragile mood wouldn't snap again. Quite frankly, it was exhausting and Nagisa had almost been looking forward to going back to school but then he remembered Karma had gotten himself suspended.

It wasn't as if Nagisa could easily see Karma after school since he'd have to think of a good cover so his mother wouldn't get suspicious, after all, she had 'banned' Nagisa from seeing him again. Logically, Nagisa knew it was down-right tyrannical of his mother to be so controlling, but another part of him felt immensely guilty for planning to continue seeing Karma; A voice that sounded like his mother's shouted at him internally ( _Nagisa, you evil boy! You awful son! How could you even consider doing something that makes your own mother so upset? You don't even take her suicide attempts seriously enough. What if she finds out you're betraying her and she really does kill herself? how will you feel then, you selfish child!)_

Nagisa shoved all his thoughts to the back of his head as he arrived at school. He'd purposefully walked slowly through the corridors towards his classroom so he didn't have to sit in home room before the bell for too long (people knew he was friends with Karma so they'd probably be asking him all sorts of questions about his suspension and the fight. Questions Nagisa would rather not answer) He also walked the long way through the art corridors which were almost entirely empty this early. As he was walking, Nagisa suddenly heard the sound of high-pitch giggling; Something that wasn't all that unusual in a high school full of teenage girls, but the next noise caught his attention. It was the sound of a male voice murmuring something softly.. but not just any male voice. It was one Nagisa would recognise anywhere; Gakushuu.

Nagisa froze when he realised the sounds were coming from the store cupboard next to him. Nagisa knew he should forget what he heard and just carry on walking, but his legs felt rooted to the spot and his body petrified. His heart hammered in his chest. _It doesn't matter what's going on. It's non of your business any more._ But Nagisa found he physically couldn't move.

Suddenly, the store room door swung open and Nagisa felt as if his heart had dropped into his stomach. Out from the cupboard skipped Kaho Tsuchiya her face pink and grinning. He normally perfect uniform looked a tiny bit rustled and her usually short skirt looked extra short. Upon seeing Nagisa, she looked him up and down with her grey eyes before saying dismissively.

"What are you looking at, twerp?" And walking off, her silky black hair swaying behind her. Behind her, out of the cupboard walked Gakushuu. His eyes widened and he stopped as soon as he saw Nagisa, allowing Kaho to walk ahead. There was a pregnant pause while the two simply stood and stared at each other, both a little shell shocked. Gakushuu broke it first.

"Are you stalking me?" He accused. Nagisa frowned, all the frustration he'd experienced over the weekend bubbling over to irritability.

"I just happened to be walking down this corridor. Not everything in my life revolves around you. At least. not anymore." Nagisa said with a harshness he would of thought was impossible for himself. He wasn't even with Gakushuu any more, but seeing him with someone else still bothered him. It was more the fact he felt like his role had simply been replaced by another faceless follower. Was he really that meaningless?

"No,how could I forget about your criminal lover? You've got another stronger male to satisfy you now." Gakushuu retorted. He also seemed to be in a bad mood, and as always had no problem taking it out on Nagisa.

"And you have another submissive follower to satisfy your needs too. That didn't take long." Nagisa hissed back, uncharacteristically brutal. "But really? Kaho Tsychiya? She has quite a reputation. And isn't she Seo Tomoya's girlfriend? I thought he was your friend."

"What? are you going to tell him?" Gakushuu challenged with a scoff. "And if you were smart, Shiota you'd stop acting so uppity when you don't have your criminal boyfriend to back you up."

"Why? Are you going to hit me again?" Nagisa retorted, glaring up at Gakushuu. Gakushuu took a step forward, making Nagisa suddenly aware of how much taller Gakushuu was and how easy he could over power him. Gakushuu quickly raised his fist, Nagisa flinched away, but the other never made a move to strike him, just leaving his arm suspended there. Gakushuu grinned as Nagisa flinched.

"And if I did? what would you do about it? You going to sic Akabane on me again? I'd _love_ that. I'd get a chance to punch his face in again and he'd almost certainly get expelled. Two birds. One stone." Gakushuu said. Nagisa just realised it, but the look in his violet eyes was almost unhinged. Maybe it was just the purplish bruise around his eyes, but his iris' looked brighter somehow. Once again, he was reminded that although Gakushuu was easy to read, he was hard to understand.

"Gakushuu, I didn't _ask_ Karma to fight you." Nagisa said, stepping backwards, his heart fluttering. He couldn't tell if he was scared or aroused. Maybe both. "Trust me. Karma wont be risking his education by fighting you again."

Asano backed away, looking slightly calmer, but still pissed. "I hope you're very happy with him." He said bitterly. "Although, maybe I'm hoping in vain, since I don't think I've ever seen you acting more miserable."

Nagisa felt a flash of _annoyance,_ because part of what Asano said was true. Although he was happy he had Karma, he was miserable because of the whole situation with his mother.

"I'd say I hope you and Kaho are happy together- " Nagisa said vindictively. "But I don't think I've ever seen you happy. I'm not sure you're even capable of it."

And with that, Nagisa turned and left, leaving Asano behind him, his heart still hammering in his chest. W _e may no longer be sleeping together, but we still end up taking frustrations out on eachother in other ways, huh._

* * *

As Nagisa expected, school without Karma felt torturous. Every minute seemed to drag on for hours without his red haired friend whispering to him in class, speaking back to the teacher and explaining the more difficult concepts. Even lunch time had felt like a chore with everyone else sat with friends and Nagisa all alone. After having a taste of friendship, the loneliness cut deeper... he was no longer accustomed to isolation.

When the final bell rang, it felt like a relief until Nagisa remembered that he'd have to head home to be with his mother. Suddenly he felt a profound sense of hopelessness; _I hate being at school, I hate being at home. There's nowhere I can be happy._ Gakushuu's words rang in his head _I don't think I've ever seen you acting more miserable._

When he did arrive home, Nagisa was relieved that he had two hours of peace at least before his mother arrived home from work, it felt like the only peace he'd get all day. If he was lucky, her train would get delayed ( _Bad, selfish son! how could you think that!)_. No sooner had he took his shoes off and switched the kettle he heard the sound of someone knocking at the door. _Who could that be?_

Nagisa walked over to the door briskly opening it. Stood before him was Karma. As soon as he saw him, Nagisa very briefly forgot about all his issues from the last few days. Just seeing Karma's face made him feel lighter. Instinctively, Nagisa leaned forward and hugged him. Karma seemed surprised at first then hugged him back.

"Happy to see me I assume." Karma said with a smirk. Nagisa's eyes widened as he remembered the situation and just how nosey and gossipy his neighbours were. He quickly pulled Karma inside his apartment and slammed the door shut.

"Karma- what are you doing here?" Nagisa asked, suddenly feeling worried _Nobody saw, right? Not that nosy Tanaka woman? right?_

"Thought I'd surprise you since you said you couldn't go out anywhere after school.. are you okay, Nagisa?" Karma asked. Once again, Nagisa was faced between the choice of telling Karma the full truth which could be a relief, but might also scare him off if he knew the extent of Nagisa's crazy family life.

"It's- I'm fine. the neighbors are super nosy. I don't want to give them any reason to gossip.." Nagisa explained. His eyes shifted to the side. "One of them told my mom about how you got suspended and now she thinks your a 'bad influence' on me. I know, stupid, right? I'm sorry."

It was technically the truth, but Nagisa downplayed it, made it sound like his mother was the normal overprotective type who nagged her son to get her way, not made suicide attempts.

"So she thinks I'm corrupting you?" Karma said with a wolfish grin, luckily he wasn't offended. He swooped down, putting an arm around Nagisa's waist and dipping him down so the only thing stopping him from falling to the floor was Karma's hold. "If only she knew the truth, that you're the one who's corrupting me by introducing me to your dark world of debauchery. You know, I'd never even made out with anyone before I met you, temptress."

"Well, your virginity is next on my list." Nagisa said, an amused smirk forming on his face. He felt safe somehow in Karma's arms. "But before that, do you want a cup of tea?"

* * *

They ended up making out in Nagisa's room, tea cups abandoned and quickly cooling down. They didn't go all the way, since it wasn't like Nagisa kept protection in his room, and besides, he couldn't completely relax since he had to keep an eye on the clock. He'd told Karma to leave at 6.45 (fifteen minutes before mum came home). Karma was disappointed, but agreed.

After a while they finally stopped. It was strange to Nagisa, foreplay with no sex. But not entirely unpleasant. He sat on his bed as Karma sifted through his collection of DS games.

"This really is abysmal. You have nintendogs but don't have Mario Kart?" Karma tutted, before turning his attention to Nagisa's book collection.

"I had no idea you were such a game buff." Nagisa laughed, feeling somewhat relaxed for the first time in days. The first time since he'd last seen Karma.

"This looks like it could be full of premium blackmail material." Karma grinned as he pulled out a thick red leather-bound book ' _Memories of Kunugioaka Middle school.'_ "Is this like a yearbook for the whole of middle school? AKA the most awkward embarrassing moments of anyone's life?"

"Don't get your hopes up. I never exactly stuck out so I'm hardly in any pictures." Nagisa said warily, rolling his eyes slightly. Middle school had actually been more enjoyable than highschool for him, because Kayano and Sugino were there, and his crush, Gakushuu actually noticed him and Nagisa was naive enough to hope sex would develop mutual love.

Karma placed the book down on the bed so both of them could see it. "Fortunately for me it appears someone has marked all the pages you appear in." He said with a smirk. Nagisa actually face-palmed. _When had his mother done that?_

First Karma flipped through the portrait of Nagisa for each year of middle school. "Nagisa are you really a mortal? you haven't aged since the first year of middle school." The red head said. Nagisa rolled his eyes.

"Shut up." He said, as he looked down at his awkwardly-smiling picture of his younger self. Karma was right though, the only real difference between how he looked then compared to now was that his hair was even longer now. As he was looking through his own pictures, he couldn't help but notice Gakushuu as well. He hadn't noticed at the time, but compared to how he looked now, Gakushuu looked so _young_. In the first year picture he still had round cheeks.. _and was that a gap in his teeth? He still didn't have all his adult teeth yet?_ In Nagisa's memories, Gakushuu always seemed so mature and grown up, but in hindsight. at 12 they both looked the same age.

Second year, Gakushuu looked a little paler, slightly thinner, his cheeks more hollow. But both he and the Nagisa in the picture both looked like _children._

"You said you and Gakushuu began seeing each other in second year?" Karma murmured for confirmation, his gaze directed at the pictures.

"Yeah.. Half way through the school year, during the summer. Just after I turned 14." Nagisa admitted thinking back to it. Karma didn't respond, but his silence spoke volumes. For the first time, Nagisa was confronted with how young he and Gakushuu had truly been when the started their relationship, and it made him uneasy. At the time, Nagisa felt fairly grown up, and Gakushuu seemed to posses all the authority of an adult. But he had been thirteen. The kids in the picture looked like they should be playing video games and having their first kisses, not having a secret friends with benefits relationship. Gakushuu had been the one who initiated it.. He was the one who knew what to do. _Where had he learned that from?_ _Why did he have such strict rules about contact?_ Suddenly, Nagisa wanted to know more than ever. Before he could voice his concerns however, Nagisa heard the sound of the key turning in the lock.

Instantly, dread filled his stomach and his heart began hammering.

"Nagisa! My boss said I wasn't 'working at my best' today so he sent me home early!- Come help me with the shopping!" His mother shouted. Oh god she was in a bad mood. In one quick move, Nagisa grabbed Karma by the arm and practically shoved him in his closet. Karma opened his mouth, but Nagisa cut him off.

"I'm sorry please be quiet!" Nagisa hissed, his hands already shaking. _Oh God! Oh God! How could this of happened!._ Nagisa quickly slammed the closet door shut and ran out his room to his mother feeling completely jittery. His heart sunk when he noticed just how enraged she was. Nothing would escape her war path and Nagisa was her favourite target.

Quickly, he took the bags out of her hand. "Your boss is an idiot, mum. I know how hard you work. He shouldn't of sent you home early. But at least.. we get to spend some more time together." Nagisa said while faking a bright smile. _Just be the perfect son._

"If even you understand then my boss should." His mother huffed, running a hand through Nagisa's hair. _Oh thank God it's working._ "You know what would cheer me up, since we do have some time together?" Nagisa's heart was already sinking. "If we played dress up again. You still have all those dresses I bought you in your closet, right? Let me go pick on out."

 _Oh God! Oh God no! no! no! no! no!_

"Well.. I would love to but I actually have a lot of homework today- " Nagisa started to say, but cut himself off when he sensed the atmosphere rising in tension and his mother's expression darkening. When the slap came, he was expecting it.

"ALL I DO FOR YOU! ALL THE WORK I PUT IN TO RAISE YOU AND YOU WONT EVEN DO THE TINIEST THING FOR ME IN MY TIME OF NEED?" Mother screeched, grabbing Nagisa by the shoulders and shaking him hard. Her eyes were wide and bloodshot, spittle flew from her mouth as she spoke.

"Mother- I'm sorry- " Nagisa tried to say, but it was too late, his mother's mood was already broken. His mother let go of Nagisa's shoulders, and instead grabbed onto the sides of his head, his fingers gripping his long blue hair painfully.

"FINE! I SEE HOW YOU FEEL- YOU DON'T EVEN CARE ABOUT ME! YOU THINK I'D BE BETTER OFF DEAD!" Mother screamed. Nagisa felt his stomach drop, he tried to put his arms around her to comfort her.

"Mother, no- please don't- I love you. I'm sorry. SO please don't" Nagisa begged as his mother sobbed. "We can do anything you want. Anything that will make you happy- "

"OHH.. I wouldn't want you to force yourself for me! You don't have to _pretend_ to care for me" Mother said, pushing Nagisa off her so hard he hit the kitchen counter _hard._ Nagisa sunk to his knees. 

"I'm sorry." He sniffed. Mother just glared at him.

"Stop acting pathetic and trying to get my sympathy- I work 60 hours a week, breaking my back to keep you fed and do I beg for sympathy?" She sneered. ' _Only all the time_ Nagisa thought.

"I'm sorry." Nagisa repeated, but it was in vain. His mother stormed out the kitchen to her room.

"Don't bother me. I'm having a nap" She hissed. Nagisa had checked her room throughout the weekend. He knew there were no pills or objects sharp enough to slit wrists, and he knew from first-hand experience his mother didn't know how to tie a noose with the curtain rope. She should be safe in there. Still shaking and dazed, Nagisa pulled himself off the floor, making his way quietly to his room. He half expected his mother to burst out and start yelling at him again any moment, but thankfully, she didn't.

Quietly, Nagisa snuck into his room, and pulled open the closet door. Karma was crouched there with a deeply concerned expression. His knuckles were white from clenching his fists. As soon as he saw Nagisa, he wordlessly pulled him into a hug.

"Th- That was just- Mother just- " Nagisa said, attempting to rationalise what Karma would of just heard.

"Don't try to explain it away. Don't try to give excuses." Karma whispered in Nagisa's ear, his voice low and serious. "Nagisa, you shouldn't have to live like this."  
At those words, the floodgates broke, and Nagisa began silently sobbing in Karma's arms.

* * *

 **Sorry if you think Nagisa OOC in this with how snappy he is with Gakushuu, but that's only because of all the shit between them, and all the shit he has going on in his life. I firmly believe even the calm Nagisa has a breaking point (IE when he flips out at Takaoka, or at Karma during the civil war arc). Plus Gakushuu's also goading him into it. So hopefully this isn't too OOC.**

 **Nagisa and Gakushuu's relationship is quite sad because they probably both have the ability to truly help the other because of their similar experiences, but instead they're stuck in a truly dysfunctional relationship, even when they're not 'in' a relationship. I think Nagisa and Karma have an interesting dynamic in this, since Karma definitely acts as the more dominant one but Nagisa is the one with more experience, I guess that counts as being a little subversive? Maybe. The reason Karma has so little experience romantically before he met Nagisa was because he 1. He moved around schools so much he usually didn't get to know people well enough because of his naturally guarded nature. and 2. He is gay, so his dating pool is a little more limited, especially because most other gay students weren't open about it either.**

 **This is a chapter for revelations really. Nagisa is starting to pick up that Gakushuu's actions are full of red flags, and Karma has had his eyes opened to the extent of the abuse Nagisa faces.**

 ** _Let me know what you thought of this chapter! If I should write more or not! What you liked/disliked! What you'd like to see next time!_**


	9. Chapter 9

_**Phantasm;**_ _ **an illusory likeness of something**_

Karma glared up at the ceiling, his bed sheets clenched tightly in his fists and his teeth grinding. It was the early hours of the morning and he hadn't been able to sleep for even a moment. He was too frustrated and angry. Thoughts of earlier that day swirled around his mind endlessly, tormenting him. He was unable to forget hearing Nagisa's mother abuse him.

 _"Don't try to explain it away. Don't try to give excuses." Karma whispered in Nagisa's ear, his voice low and serious. "Nagisa, you shouldn't have to live like this."_  
 _At those words, the floodgates broke, and Nagisa began silently sobbing in Karma's arms. He felt so small and fragile as Karma held him, as if he could break at any moment. Nagisa's shoulder's shook as he cried, but Karma could tell he was trying to muffle any sounds._

 _"-Othing you can do." Nagisa gasped out._

 _"What?" Karma hissed._

 _"There's nothing you can do."_

Remembering those words, Karma lifted his fist up and smashed it back down onto the mattress in sheer frustration. Just the memory of those words pierced his heart and made his blood boil. He _hated_ feeling helpless.

 _"What do you mean 'nothing'?" Karma said, incredulous. "I can help you. You don't have to live like this. I wont let you. Come to my place- "_

 _But Nagisa just pulled away from Karma, a look of resignation on his face. He looked up at Karma with teary eyes, they were filled with something akin to pity. "I can't, Karma." Nagisa said, sounding almost wistful. "If I left my mother like that she really would fall apart. I'd love to go stay at your place, but it isn't that simple, I can't just leave."_

 _Karma stared at him in disbelief. He felt his grip on Nagisa's shoulders tighten to almost painful. "She's hurting you, Nagisa. who cares if she 'falls apart' she brought this on herself." He hissed, his voice full of spite. He couldn't bring himself to feel sympathy for that woman who was hurting Nagisa. But Nagisa just shook his head sadly._

 _"I can't, Karma." He repeated sounding miserable but resigned. "I refuse to leave her, I wont be responsible for causing her that misery. You should go."_

Fuck! How could Nagisa allow himself to be treated like that? His mother was clearly keeping him emotionally hostage.. It wasn't fair. Karma pictured Nagisa in his mind's eye.. He was so fragile and innocent, but so many people took advantage of that.. Bullies at school, Gakushuu, his own mother. Nagisa didn't even seem to do anything to stop it. It was like Nagisa _couldn't_ stand up for himself. _Maybe if Nagisa can't keep himself safe, I should make sure he's safe, whether he likes it or not_ Karma thought to himself. _Nagisa was so easy to control it probably wouldn't be hard to do._ Karma visualized Nagisa sitting in a locked room with Karma, safe from the rest of the world who wanted to hurt him and take advantage. Karma let out a hollow laugh _I really am sick, aren't I?_

* * *

 _Nagisa Shiota is replaceable_ Asano told himself for what felt like the hundredth time since Nagisa had broke it off with him. Finding another person to sleep with had been easy; Asano had people fawn after him for as long as he could remember, he just had to pick someone he trusted to keep their mouth shut. Kaho was an obvious choice, since her reputation would be shattered more than Asano's if it was revealed she was cheating on her boyfriend Seo. She might seem like an airhead, but she was smarter than she looked, and sly too. It helped that she was beautiful too.

 _But for some reason it's not the same. Being with Nagisa was just better_ Asano admitted to himself. He was currently sat at his desk attempting to do work, but these types of thoughts kept creeping into his mind. Trying to banish them was useless, they kept coming back. _Why wasn't being with Kaho as good as Nagisa? They perform the same function. I find Kaho attractive, so why is it not the same?_ Asano bit his lip in annoyance. It was frustrating to think that he had any sort of real attachment to Nagisa, it made him feel weak and needy, as if he'd lost somehow. Nagisa was _supposed_ to just be like an object for him to use at his convenience.

 _You shouldn't use people as commodities, Gakushuu_ Nagisa's voice echoed in his mind.

 _Don't use people as commodities? that's all I seem to get used as. It's the way the world works, the sooner you realise that they quicker you can adapt to it._ Asano retorted, even though he knew he was only replying to his own thoughts. Damnit. He really was going crazy if he was arguing with himself now.. He tried to push Nagisa as far out from his mind as possible..

 _Nagisa's probably with Karma right now. He really does have a terrible choice in men. First me, now a future prison inmate._ Gakushuu let out a sly chuckle, despite himself. He had to admit, as much he was a violent delinquent, Karma could probably offer Nagisa a more mutual caring relationship than Asano was ever capable of. Asano thought back to Nagisa's words _I don't think I've ever seen you happy. I don't think you're capable of it,_ he was probably right, Asano thought, I may be a brilliant genius but I'm filled with pure poison that will suck the light out of anybody.

The good part of Asano wanted Nagisa and Karma to be happy together, but the spiteful part wished they ended up just as miserable as he felt.. Whatever. They didn't matter, Asano tried to assure himself, he just had to get used to Kaho, and if she didn't work, he'd find someone else. He could have his own harem if he wanted! He'd use as many people as he needed until he felt like he had control again.

* * *

Nagisa felt wracked with guilt. In many ways, this was nothing new to him, it admittedly didn't take a lot to make Nagisa feel guilty but tonight he felt especially bad, for multiple reasons. Firstly, for his mother. Even though he knew she was manipulative and demanding, he still felt guilty for disobeying her and seeing Karma, then managing to upset her again. He knew she was irrational and unfair but that didn't stop the guilt from seeping in.

Secondly, he felt guilty about Karma. Karma had enough going on in his own life without worrying about Nagisa as well, but now because he knows what Hiromi is like he feels responsible for protecting Nagisa. _It's not fair I got him into that position._ Nagisa thought to himself. Karma had already earned himself a suspension trying to protect Nagisa, and now Nagisa was leading him to further trouble? It didn't seem fair. Nagisa felt as if he was a leech, just taking and taking from Karma.. _If I wasn't so selfish I'd just break it off with him and set him free._

Finally, Nagisa felt guilty about Gakushuu. He wasn't sure why exactly but the image of the Gakushuu from middle school was imprinted in his mind. In the darkness of his bedroom, Nagisa felt as if he could see those haunting violet eyes staring at him accusingly. _I always did whatever you told me to do? What did I do wrong?_ Nagisa wondered desperately. Of course, the Gakushuu in his mind didn't have an answer for him.

Finally, Nagisa fell into an uneasy sleep. Images of his mother, Karma and Nagisa plagued his dreams, all glaring at him with accusing eyes and speaking at him with acid tongues.

 _"Nagisa I do everything for you, but you still disappoint me!" His mother screamed, pulling at her hair, her eyes wide_

 _"All you do is get me into trouble. Why can't you protect yourself so I don't have to!" Karma hissed. He was wearing his school uniform, but it was ripped and covered in a red liquid; blood. "You're ruining my life."_

 _"Why didn't you ever help me?" The Gakushuu from four years ago demanded. He was wearing his middle school uniform, but it looked uncomfortably tight. "You ignored all the warning signs just because you were so happy to have the chance to sleep with me, didn't you?"_

 _"No- I- I'm sorry." Nagisa gasped out, his nightmares feeling far too close to reality._

* * *

 **Sorry for such a depressing chapter of the characters basically lamenting on their depressing thoughts. But I wanted to make their thought process' clear so their actions later in the story make perfect sense. And idk, I like writing melancholy.**

 **Karma feels helpless to help Nagisa and that's making him becoming protective to the point of possessiveness.**

 **Gakushuu still has that whole superiority/inferiority complex going on. He is trying to replace Nagisa's role in his life, but it isn't that easy, and he genuinely misses him but of course, Gakushuu has a hard time admitting that to himself.**

 **Finally, Nagisa, who is prone to feeling guilty anyway, is feeling extra guilty because he feels like such a burden on everyone in his life. He's also realising retrospectively how troubled Gakushuu is and he feels responsible for not doing more to help him.**

 **I had a lot of nice comments, but I'd like to say a super big thank you to NekoHex, who left the nicest comment I've ever gotten! Seriously thank you a lot! this chapter is dedicated to you!**

 **review for more guys**


	10. Chapter 10

_**Dramatic Irony: A**_ _**literary technique, originally used in Greek tragedy, by which the full significance of a character's words or actions is clear to the audience or reader although unknown to the character.**_

To say Nagisa felt like shit was an understatement. It was likely a combination of all the stress from the past few days and his lack of sleep but he'd woken up feeling like he'd been run over by a train. Whenever he was ill, his mother would take the day off work and spend every minute looking after him; It sounded nice, but in truth, Nagisa found it suffocating to be around a woman who got set off by the tiniest thing all day.

Perhaps because of that reason, Nagisa had attempted to ignore how ill he felt and trek into school, only to be sent home before first period had even finished _I must be look ill if even the notoriously harsh Ono-Sensei can see it._ His body feeling as heavy as lead, Nagisa dragged himself through the school corridors towards the exit, on his way he sent a quick text to Karma.

 ** _Just got sent home from school for being too sick. Feel like I've caught the plague!_**

Nagisa was trying to keep things as normal as possible with Karma since yesterday, but it wasn't easy pretending like nothing was wrong. Nagisa still cringed remembering how he'd sobbed in Karma's arms, how angry Karma had looked and how frustrated he had been when Nagisa had refused his offer of help. _Oh Karma, I'd love to go stay with you and escape my problems, but I just can't._ Nagisa felt another twinge of guilt... He was making Karma feel responsible for him, it just wasn't fair...

 _Maybe It'd be better for Karma if I set him free from me. But I'm too selfish.. I don't want to._

Nagisa was dragged out of his thoughts when he suddenly felt himself bump into something or rather, _someone._ He gasped, surprised and embarrassed.

"S- Sorry!" He said before looking up and seeing exactly who it was that he'd bumped into. Gakushuu Asano looked down at him with unimpressed violet eyes. Of course. Fate hated him.

"Nagisa. You're truanting now?" Gakushuu said with a hint of disdain in his voice. As always, he managed to sound like a kind addressing his lowly subject. A couple of days ago it would of ticked Nagisa off, but now it just made him wonder why Gakushuu felt the need to act so superior all the time.

"No. I've been sent home because I'm ill. What's your excuse for being out of class." Nagisa replied, his voice calm and neutral. Of course, he had no doubt that Asano's reason for being out of class wasn't breaking the rules. Nagisa doubted Asano would ever break the rules ( _..Well.. maybe except for the 'no sex in school' rule. Actually that was a pretty important one_ ).

"I do hope you aren't contagious. My 'excuse' for being out of class is that I already know today's history lesson so the teacher sent me off for private study." Gakushuu said with a sort of casual confidence, as if that type of thing was normal for him (it probably was). Right now, he looked very different from the Gakushuu who had been haunting Nagisa's dreams last night. There was nothing sad or desperate about those eyes right now.

"I was wondering." Nagisa started to say, the words falling off the tip of his tongue before he could stop himself. "Why me? Four years ago, why did you choose to sleep with me?"

Gakushuu's eyes widened, shocked by the sudden personal question. He quickly regained his composure however. "I'm not talking about _this_ now." He hissed, his eyes darting around to see if anyone was listening, but the corridor was completely empty. Unless someone was hiding around the corner for some reason, they were completely out of earshot of anybody.

"You're a genius, aren't you, Gakushuu? You can answer this simple question for me." Nagisa insisted, his blue eyes meeting Gakushuu's. He was sure his current lack of sleep and sickness was making him slightly less inhibited.

"Ever since Akabane arrived you've become so much more irritating!" Gakushuu snapped, still refusing to answer the question. Nagisa expected him to storm away, but for whatever reason he was staying- maybe he was interested in hearing what Nagisa had to say.

"I think I know why you choose me- It was because I was convenient for you. Because being in control of me makes you feel more powerful, doesn't it? Why is that?" Nagisa accused. Once again, Gakushuu's eyes widened and he had that shocked expression on his face. Nagisa almost felt satisfied for getting Asano to break his composure so quickly. Part of him felt like saying these things was a bad idea and a good way to get punched again, but all his thoughts and questions from last night were just spilling out.

"Stop being ridiculous- _Here_ is not the right place to talk about this!" Gakushuu said defensively. He had his arms out in front of him and looked as if he were fighting the urge to clamp a hand over Nagisa's mouth. Nagisa let out an almost desperate sounding laugh.

"Then when _is_ the right time? I've had these questions for years now; Was _I_ the first person you slept with? Why do you have such strict rules about touch?.. You're such a headfuck, Gakushuu Asano." Nagisa said. It felt like word vomit, it all just came out as soon as he thought it. ' _Headfuck_ ' was definitely a word he'd learned from Karma.

"You clearly aren't in a right state of mind. Just go home, Nagisa, stop embarrassing yourself." Gakushuu said through gritted teeth. Nagisa couldn't tell if he looked more angry, upset or.. nervous? Gakushuu grabbed Nagisa's shoulder's and began forcibly walking him down the corridor. "Just go home."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you." Nagisa said, almost tripping over his own feet as he was pushed down the corridor. "I'm not _trying_ to piss you off. I'm trying to help you. I just don't know how."

"I don't need your help. You can't even look after yourself." Gakushuu said harshly, as he continued to walk behind Nagisa, his hands on his shoulders. Nagisa wanted to talk to him face-to-face, so he turned around only to trip over his own feet and fall into Gakushuu. Taken by surprise, Gakushuu only just managed to grab Nagisa by his forearms before he fell.

"I'm sorry." Nagisa repeated, his vision blurring ( _I really am sick._.). Gakushuu opened his mouth to retort (Probably to tell Nagisa off.) But before he could do so, the two were interrupted by the sound of footsteps down the corridor. They both turned to see the Chairman standing before them.

"Well, well boys. What's going on here?" The Chairman said, a wide smile on his face. Nagisa actually gasped out loud. The Chairman was a tall well-built man anyway, but something about his presence made him seem extra massive, like a shadow looming over you. Even though he was smiling, there was still something terrifying about his expression. There was something sinister and unreadable about him. Nagisa felt Asano tense as soon as he saw his father. Suddenly his jaw was tight and his grip on Nagisa's forearms was like a vice. Then a second later, Asano let go of Nagisa and stood up straight.

"Shiota is ill and has been sent home from class. I was assisting him, sir. As student council president I have a duty to look after fellow students." Gakushuu said, his voice almost robotic. Nagisa just nodded, not trusting himself to say too much in his current state. The last thing he wanted was to make trouble in front of the chairman himself.

"How altruistic of you, Asano." The Chairman said, sounding anything but sincere. This was the first time that Nagisa had seen the two actually interact, he realised with a jolt of surprise. The two didn't even seem like father and son, however. There was a tangible coldness between them.

Nagisa jumped when he felt the Chairman suddenly place a large hand on his shoulder. Gakushuu too suddenly tensed and narrowed his eyes at his father as soon as he made contact with Nagisa- Gakushuu looked like he wanted to tear his father's hand off his wrist for touching Nagisa. Nagisa himself could feel the tension, but was also slightly confused.. Gakushuu didn't talk about his father, _what sort of relationship did they have?_

The Chairman smiled at Asano, looking almost mocking, before picking Nagisa's bag off his shoulder by the strap. "This is heavy for someone who's ill to carry." The Chairman said, before starting walking. "Come along, Shiota, I'll walk you to the gates. You can get the bus from there?"

"Oh- Thank you, sir." Nagisa said bashfully, feeling almost suffocated by this atmosphere. He started walking to catch up to the Chairman _This man is terrifying! I don't want to have to walk with him.. But I've got no good reason to refuse._ To his surprise, Gakushuu started walking by his side, glaring ahead and refusing to make eye contact.

"There's no need to worry, Asano. I'm escorting Nagisa to the school gate now. You can go back to your lesson." The Chairman said as he continued to walk, Nagisa's bag in his hands.

"As student council president I am obligated to help students personally." Gakushuu replied. Even with Asano's convincing tone, it still seemed like a lousy excuse. Nagisa was confused; _Why was Gakushuu going to such lengths to stick by him now, when a few seconds ago he seemed as if he wanted nothing more than to leave him?_ The Chairman laughed.

"You're being oddly stubborn about this. One might almost think you didn't want to leave Shiota alone with me." The Chairman said, his tone light and teasing. Gakushuu didn't answer. Taking time out of his busy scheduled to help one sick student to the gate seemed somehow out of character for the Chairman, and Nagisa had a feeling he was only doing it as some sort of way to get under Gakushuu's skin. _But that would be absurd, wouldn't it?_

The walk from Nagisa's classroom to the school gate had never felt so long and silent in his life. The tense atmosphere from walking with both Asanos was stifling and every second felt like torture. _I can't stand this! It's so awful! Just let me get to the gate right now!_ Nagisa felt he was caught in the crossfires of war he didn't understand. He just kept his eyes trained to the ground to avoid making eye contact with either of them.

Just as they reached the main entrance, Nagisa heard the sound of something hitting the ground. When he looked up, he saw Gakushuu picking himself up of the floor, his father stood over him. _Had Gakushuu fell? Or had the Chairman pushed him over when Nagisa wasn't looking?.. But that's crazy, isn't it? He wouldn't do that._

"You need to pay more attention to your surroundings. You can be so clumsy sometimes." The Chairman practically taunted. He offered Gakushuu a hand, but his son ignored it as he stood up. Gakushuu's face burned red and he glared at the floor. Nagisa had never seen him act like this before.. Gakushuu seemed so passive and subdued. Nagisa felt a chill run down his spine when he caught the look of amusement in the Chairman's eyes.

"I'll be more careful." Gakushuu mumbled in reply, turning his head to avoid eye contact with Nagisa, who was now staring at him. If looked as if Gakushuu found this whole situation as unpleasant as Nagisa did, but he was still choosing to stay rather than leave. The three set off walking again as if nothing happened. This time however, Nagisa didn't look at the ground, he kept his eyes fixed on Asano and his father.. he had a feeling that if he looked away for even a second something would happen again.

When they _finally_ reached the gate, the Chairman handed Nagisa his bag back with a large smile. "Please go straight home and straight to bed." He said, sounding almost caring. Nagisa nodded.

"Thank you for your assistance, both of you." Nagisa said. He was taken by surprise once again when the Chairman pressed a hand against his forehead suddenly. Nagisa instinctively backed away so quickly that he hit the gate behind him. Gakushuu, who was hovering nearby too a step forward, looking as if he wanted to rip his father's hand away from Nagisa's face. The look in his eyes was one of restrained rage.

"You really do have a fever." The Chairman said, pretending to be oblivious the reaction of his two students. "You take it easy now. You want to be at your peak for upcoming exams."

"-Right thank you." Nagisa said, practically running out of the gate, feeling a rush of relief to be free from Asano's father. _He had been in school for less than an hour and it had been completely wild!_ He glanced back to see the two Asano's walking back towards the school together. For some reason he wasn't sure of, Nagisa felt oddly guilty for leaving Gakushuu alone with his father.

Nagisa felt his phone buzz. A text from Karma. He checked it;

 _ **Come over to my place. I kno how to make chicken soup. I'll look after you ;)**_

Nagisa read it, feeling a sense of warmth as he thought of Karma. After the awful morning he'd had so far being with Karma sounded like bliss. Plus, that whole weird interaction he'd had with both Asano and his father had left him with a bad taste in his mouth.. he wanted to get someone elses opinion on it. Part of him felt like he shouldn't go to Karma's.. He didn't want to risk his mother's wrath again and he felt wrong for relying on Karma even more. But he also didn't want to spend the rest of the day ill and alone with his thoughts, feeling a little impulsive, Nagisa text back

 _ **On my way.**_

* * *

 ** _Another chapter out the way. I made Nagisa get fic so Karma can take care of him (JK). This chapter has a lot of dramatic irony since the readers know why Gakushuu acts weird around the chairman, but Nagisa doesn't._**

 ** _Review for more._**


	11. Chapter 11

**Thank you for all the reviews on the last chapter! people who take the time to review keep writers going :D**

* * *

As soon as Gakushuu walked through the main entrance of the school he was ready to head off into the exact opposite direction to his father without sparing the man a second glance. But of course, it wasn't that simple. As soon as he attempted to speed off, his father grabbed him by the back of his collar, pulling him back firmly, that infuriating smile on his face. Gakushuu was left with the uncomfortable feeling of being an insect under a magnifying glass, at the mercy of a particularly sadistic human.

"Why in such a hurry, Asano?" The Chairman asked, still not letting go of his son's collar. Gakushuu felt his heart pound in his chest and his hands shake ever so slightly. The burn mark on his chest from last time seemed to radiate heat. He tired to force himself to be calm _You are in public, he can't do anything to you here.._ Or at least, that's what Gakushuu had initially thought, but the Chairman apparently had no problem pushing him to the floor even when Nagisa Shiota was mere inches away. _Nagisa.._ Asano thought that he knew the boy well, but in their last few interactions he'd become so assertive. _Was this Akabane's doing?_

"I'm busy. I'm sure you are too, sir. Please excuse me." Gakushuu retorted. The grip on the back of his collar made it so he couldn't turn to face his father, but that suited Gakushuu just fine. He'd rather look at the wall as he talked anyway. It was less pressure. The Chairman didn't let him go however, instead the man just lent down and hissed into Asano's ear.

"Nagisa Shiota is an interesting choice. It's not what I would of expected from you." He said. His voice was low and dangerous, it sent a shiver down Asano's spine. He was once again great-full he was looking at the wall, if he'd been looking at his father he wasn't sure he'd manage to disguise the horror on his face.

"I'm not entirely sure what you're implying." Asano said, staring straight ahead. The feeling of dread was beginning to intensify. It was taking every morsel of self control not to fall apart right now _No! His father couldn't know! He couldn't!_

"Whenever I touched Shiota you looked as though you wanted to bite my head off, you wouldn't even let me be alone with him. I thought I knew you well, but I never thought you were the jealous type. But then, it turns out there's a lot of things I don't know about you, isn't there?" The Chairman hissed, he sounded like he was struggling to keep his voice quiet. It seemed as if rage he'd been keeping buried down was exploding outwards. Gakushuu cursed himself _Why did I have to make it so obvious? I should of just left Nagisa alone with him. Why am I so goddamn protective over him? I don't even really care about Nagisa, right?_ The Chairman pulled Gakushuu around forcing their eyes to meet so it was clear just how livid the Chairman truly was. "I heard everything. Four years? _Four years_ you've been sleeping with that boy and you somehow managed to keep it hidden from me?"

 _Oh God. He must of heard! He must of been around the corner when Nagisa and he had been speaking! No.. this can't happen!_

"I've never once slept with Nagisa! He was out of his mind with a fever. He was talking nonsense- " Gakushuu tried to explain, but before he could even finish he felt large hands wrap tightly around his neck and slam him harshly into the wall. Instinctively, Asano grabbed at the other in an attempt to free himself, but it was to no avail. His eyes darted from side to side. They were stood right by the main entrance. There was a classroom door a few feet away. Someone could walk by them at any second. His father really must be angry if he was being this reckless.

"You are _terrible_ at lying. Yet you still managed to sneak around behind my back for four years. What else aren't you telling me? How many other people have you slept with?" The Chairman said, his grip on Asano's neck tightening painfully. Asano truly began to panic when he realised he couldn't breath. He couldn't even speak to make up excuses. "You belong to me. I created you! I taught you everything you know! You have no right to whore yourself out to anyone else without my permission."

Asano began to feel dizzy as he was deprived of oxygen, he tried to speak but all that came out was choking noises. His father viewed him as property and reveled in the complete control he had over Gakushuu's life. The Chairman was _always_ stronger, always smarter, always one step ahead. Realizing that Gakushuu had managed to pull the wool over his eyes and sneak around his back for years was likely a huge blow not only to his pride, but to his whole world view. The Chairman was humiliated and that transformed into pure rage. His violet eyes were like that of a demon's, they seemed blank of consciousness somehow as if he'd completely lost himself to anger and almost wasn't aware of his actions. At this point, Gakushuu was clawing hard enough at his father's hands to draw blood, but the man didn't even seem to notice

For a moment, Gakushuu's vision blacked out and he had a horrifying feeling that he was actually going to die right there in the school corridor by his own father's hands. Then he felt the hands drop from his neck. Gakushuu's knee's buckled as he slid down against the wall massaging his neck and greedily sucking in oxygen. His eyes watering, Gakushuu looked up at the Chairman. The man's red hot rage was gone, replaced with cold unfeeling icy eyes looking down on him as if he were dirt.

"I will make you regret your actions." The Chairman said simply. It wasn't so much a threat as a promise. With that, he turned and walked the other way as if he hadn't just chocked a student out right in the middle of school. Gakushuu had no choice but to watch him go, a feeling of pure fear encasing him.

* * *

"You look like shit." Karma said, simply as soon as he opened the door and saw Nagisa stood there. The other gave a sardonic grin.

"Thanks." He replied. He felt like shit. Nagisa's whole body ached, and his head pounded, he felt shivery and sweaty at the same time and he was sure he was burning up with a fever. His mind felt slightly frazzled and it was hard to think straight, but what he _did_ know was that the sight of Karma looking at him with a barely concealed expression of concern made him feel instantly better.

"Come on, before you collapse on my doorstep." Karma said, putting a supportive arm around Nagisa's shoulder and leading him into the house. Maybe it was just because of how hard it was to think, but in that moment Nagisa found it easy to forget about what had happened between him and Karma the day before.. It was easy to forget his guilt and pretend things weren't really as complicated as they were. In that moment there was only he and Karma.

The many exotic decorations and ornaments that lined the walls were almost disorientation to Nagisa as he passed them, seeing only a blur of texture and colours. He was on auto-pilot as he followed Karma up the now familiar wooden stairs and down the red-carpet corridor into the bedroom. Karma only had to push Nagisa lightly for him to fall back into the double bed. It felt so good just to lie his aching body down.

"Now get some rest." Karma commanded, with a softness in his eyes as he pulled the blanket over the other. Nagisa looked up at him.

"You are too good for me." He blurted out, without even thinking about it. Like earlier in the day with Gakushuu, Nagisa felt as though he'd lost his filter.

"I'm just letting you use my bed, I hardly saved your life or anything. It's not a big deal." Karma said, raising an eyebrow. He was trying to seem casual, but even in his current state Nagisa could tell that comment had made him a little bashful.

"I think you might actually care about me. You aren't just using me." Nagisa said, his thoughts almost automatically becoming words. Karma sat on the edge of the bed, a slight frown on his face.

"You _think_? I'm not Gakushuu, Nagisa." Karma said. Karma wasn't the type of person who could easily say words like 'I care about you' out loud, but he thought his actions had conveyed it.. _But two of the most 'important' relationships in his life have been with two people who just want to use and control him. Of course he's got trust issues_ Karma realised.. Between his mother and Gakushuu Nagisa had very little chance of experiencing a healthy relationship in anyway.

"That's why you're too good for me. I'll just drag you down- I've already gotten you in trouble- I- " Nagisa babbled. He was cut off when Karma put a gentle yet stern finger to his lips, silencing him. Nagisa's eyes widened in surprise, Karma lay down so his head was next to Nagisa's on the pillow.

"It's my choice, I'm _choosing_ to care about you, so it's not your fault. I'm a big boy, Nagisa, I can handle it." Karma said, wrapping his arms around the other. Nagisa felt heat rush to his cheeks, but this time it wasn't from the fever.

"Your going to catch my illness." Nagisa warned, ducking his head down into the covers. It was strange that he had been sexually active for years, but shows of tender affection like this still managed to make him blush.

"My choice." Karma said inn a sing-song voice. Nagisa chuckled despite himself. This situation felt symbolic of their relationship somehow.

"For a smart person you can be an idiot" Nagisa said,already feeling himself drifting off to sleep.

* * *

 **So I thought I'd write some fluffy Karma/Nagisa since the first part of the story is so awful, and there's more awfulness to come (Sorry guys). Idk how well I conveyed it, but the Chairman is the maximum amount of angry a human could be after finding out about Gakushuu and Nagisa, so of course, he's probably going to do something.**

 **Thank you for all the reviewers, including guest reviews (Neko Hex, and 'guest') Pls let me know what you think of this chapter and what you think could happen.**


	12. Chapter 12

"You _always_ let me down, Nagisa!" His mother hissed. She stood over him, her imaged warped, looking about ten foot tall. "It's your fault that my husband, your _father_ left us! You're his son- He should want to raise you but he doesn't!"

"I'm sorry, mother." Nagisa winced, feeling as if he were shrinking.

"That's all you can ever be, Nagisa; Sorry! But you can't _do_ anything. besides messing up." His mother screamed so loud it hurt his ears. "You want to hurt me, don't you? Don't you!?"

"No. No. I'm sorry, mother. I'll be better." Nagisa whimpered, he looked up at his mother's form looming over him, his blood ran cold. Her eyes were wild with anger, her face blotchy and red. Part of him wanted to run away but he felt rooted to the spot he he dared not move. He had a sense of foreboding, like something awful was going to happen. Nagisa felt his breath hitch in fear.

"Nagisa."

She was calling his name.

"Nagisa!"

Wait, that wasn't his mother.. It sounded more like.. Karma.

 ** _"Nagisa!"_**

Nagisa's eyes snapped open suddenly. He was lying in bed, his heart hammering in his chest and a thin sheen of cold sweat covering him. He looked around, trying to catch his breath. Karma was sat next to him, a firm hand around his arm.

"You were having a nightmare. Must be some sort of fever dream." The red haired boy explained, looking at Nagisa with concerned amber eyes. Nagisa looked at him, nodding slowly as his memories quickly returned (He was sent home from school for being ill, and had went to Karma's house were he'd spent most of the day sleeping).

"Wh- What time is it?" Nagisa asked, his voice croaky from lack of use. He propped himself up onto his arms, but they felt like shaky and unsteady supports. Karma held onto him protectively.

"It's half four." Karma said, glancing briefly at his watch. Nagisa's eyes widened.

"I have to go- public transport can be a nightmare and mum finishes work at six." Nagisa said, making to jump out of bed. Karma simply pushed him and he fell easily back into the covers with a ' _oof_ '.

"You have tons of time to get back. What's the rush?" Karma said with a casual shrug. "Besides, you really shouldn't be taking public transport in your current state. You'll probably faint."

"Karma.." Nagisa pleaded, his blue eyes meeting Karma's amber. He knew Karma was just trying to protect him but Nagisa really didn't want to risk upsetting his mother again, even if Karma didn't like it. "I don't want to stress out my mother by getting back after her.."

" _Jesus_ Nagisa. You always put everyone above yourself, but what about _you?_ You're the sick one." Karma said, still sat on the bed, not releasing his grip on Nagisa's arm. "From what I can tell your mother isn't anything but nasty to you. She's just manipulating you and you know it. Why do you put up with it?"

Nagsa flinched slightly when he heard the anger evident in Karma's voice. "She's my mother. She's family." He said weakly.

" _So_?" Karma said harshly. "If there's one thing I've learnt it's that blood relations don't mean shit. The only people that matter are the people that really care, doesn't matter if you share DNA or not. My parents spend less than three months a year in this house, and it's been this way since I was twelve. Being a 'family' is just a meaningless word."

"Karma I had no idea.." Nagisa said. He knew Karma's parents were pretty much absent the whole time he'd known him, but Nagisa didn't know it had been going on for so long. Karma just averted his eyes.

"It doesn't matter. Both our parents are absolute garbage, so why should we break our backs trying to please them?" Karma said, pulling himself up so he was leaning over Nagisa, a wild grin on his face. But his expression wasn't exactly happy, there was still anger behind those eyes. Learning just how neglectful Karma's parents were suddenly made a lot of things make sense to Nagisa; Karma's lack of trust in authority, his independence, his devil-may-care attitude about getting into trouble, as if he wasn't used to experiencing consequences for bad behavior. It made Nagisa feel strangely sad thinking of Karma all alone in this house as a child feeling betrayed by the parents who left him. Karma liked pretend as if nothing bothered him, but Nagisa was sure his parents absence must hurt him on some level.

"I know my mother might seem like a monster sometimes, but she does a lot for me.. She keeps a roof over my head, she pays for my tuition, she buys food." Nagisa whispered, trying to justify it.

"Stop making excuses for her! That stuff is like the bare minimum- It's her fault that you let yourself get treated like a doormat, Nagisa." Karma hissed, keeping his grip on the other's arm. Nagisa opened his mouth to argue but couldn't come up with a rebuttal so instead he just made to climb off the bed again.

"It doesn't matter. I'm going. I'm sorry." Nagisa said, attempting to stand, only to be dragged back down to the bed by forceful hands. Nagisa let out a small gasp of surprise as Karma stood over him, holding him to the bed.

"You're sick. It's not safe." Karma insisted, amber eyes blazing. Nagisa looked up at him, feeling a sudden heartbeat of fear.

"Karma.. are you _forcing_ me to stay here? Are you really just not going to let me leave?" Nagisa asked in disbelief. He was almost scared of the answer. The look in Karma's eyes reminded Nagisa of the time that Karma had gone rampaging to A class to punch Gakushuu in the face. He had a look of relentless determination and anger. Nagisa felt a shiver run down his spine; When Karma was like this, he didn't know how to stop him.

"It's for your own good. You aren't thinking straight." Karma said, still pushing Nagisa down onto the bed. Nagisa attempted to pull himself free in vain; All he could do was squirm in Karma's grip like prey caught in a predator's trap. _I can't believe Karma's doing this._

"I know you're just trying to protect me, but you can't just force me to stay here if I don't want to." Nagisa said, trying to sound strong, but it came out more like a whimper.

" _Why not?_ Your mother forces and manipulates you into things. You let Gakushuu do whatever he wanted?" Karma said, sounding truly angry but there was a taunting edge to his voice. Standing over Nagisa, he looked like a demon. "Why do you look so scared? I'm doing this for your own good."

Nagisa winced slightly when Karma's grip on his wrists tightened. He didn't know how to stop Karma when he was in one of these rages, it was just like when Karma had attacked Gakushuu; Nagisa begging him to stop did nothing, his words couldn't reach him. Instead he just bit his tongue and waited for Karma to calm down.

"You know when you were having that nightmare before you kept crying out your mother's name, telling her you were sorry." Karma said, as if trying to justify himself. "She's really messed you up, Nagisa, and you want me to just let you walk back to her? In your current state? I'm not trying to hurt you, I'm trying to protect you."

"..Just let me go." Nagisa said his voice barely above a whisper. It sounded defeated. Karma neither loosened his grip, nor replied. There was a heavy moment of silence that seemed to stretch for a long time before it was suddenly broken by the sound of Nagisa's phone buzzing from the bedside table.

"If that's your mother texting I'll just reply and say that you're staying at a friends. That way she wont worry, ne?" Karma said with an innocent smile, as if that solved everything. Nagisa renewed his struggling to get out of the other's hold.

"Karma, don't you dare!" Nagisa shouted, but the other had already opened his phone to check Nagisa's text message. As soon as Karma read it, the smile dropped off his face and his expression darkened. Karma's eyes narrowed dangerously, and even though Nagisa had no idea what the message had said, he felt his breath hitch in fear. _What on earth does it say?_

"Nagisa?" Karma said, his voice falsely sweet, a too-wide smile appearing on his face. "You didn't mention that you saw Gakushuu today- "

"What?" Nagisa squawked. _How did Karma know about that? It wasn't like he was keeping it a secret but Nagsia hadn't mentioned it to him._ Before Nagisa could question him further his phone was suddenly jammed into his face displaying a text message;

 _ **Gakushuu Asano**_

 ** _I know this is sudden and you have every right to refuse. But can we meet to discuss what we talked about today?_**

Nagisa blinked in surprise. That was a message he never expected to receive; Did this mean that Gakushuu was ready to open up? to accept help?

"So? What's this message about?" Karma asked, bringing Nagisa's thoughts back to the here and now. His tone was accusatory, this was probably the worst time for him to see a message like this. Nagisa blinked, looking up at the other with honest blue eyes.

"I ran into Gakushuu as I was leaving the school. I asked him a few questions. I didn't do anything bad.. It was just a conversation." Nagisa said, suddenly realising how incriminating this message looked. "I think he's in trouble.."

" _This_ is what frustrates me about you, Nagisa." Karma said, cutting him off. "You care about other people more than you care about yourself. Even if those people are shitty to you and try to control you."

"Karma, if you don't let me go you aren't any better than those 'shitty' people that try to control me." Nagisa said evenly. At his words, Karma's anger and determination seemed to melt away. His expression softened as he realised the implications of what he was doing. Almost reluctantly, Karma let go of Nagisa's wrists.

"I'm just trying to do whats best for you." Karma said in a low voice, not meeting the other's eyes. Nagisa slowly sat up and got up off the bed, grabbing his coat.

"I know." Nagisa said, putting his coat on and pulling up his bag. "That's what everyone thinks."

"Please stay." Karma said. The fight had seeped out off him now, but he still wanted Nagisa to stay here, were it was _safe_.

"I'm sorry, Karma." Was Nagisa's reply before promptly leaving the room. Karma was left sat there with a strange feeling of emptiness swirling around him.

* * *

 **I thought Karma and Nagisa's relationship was becoming a little bit too functional for the story. So I thought I'd add some drama. Karma's protectiveness has bordered on possessiveness throughout the story, and it sort of overflows in this chapter. Karma's intentions are good but his actions.. more debatable?**

 **Thank you for the reviews, NekoHex and YugiKitten you keep me writing**

 **Unfortunately this story probably isn't going to get any happier soon, so sorry about that guys. Review to tell me what you thought, and what you think should happen.**


	13. Chapter 13

_This whole situation is fucked_. Karma thought to himself, glaring out his window and clenching his fists. It had been hours since Nagisa had left but their last interaction was all Karma had been able to think about; Karma had only been trying protect Nagisa by stopping him from leaving, he wasn't like Gakushuu or his mother, right? he wasn't trying to control him, he was only doing what was best for him, right? He hadn't done anything wrong.

 _But then why did Karma feel so guilty?_ Why in his mind could he see nothing other than the memory of Nagisa's scared eyes looking up at him. Karma hated that he'd made Nagisa feel afraid of him, it just confirmed his belief that he was dangerous and no-good.. unlovable. They were feelings he felt a lot. _But it's for his own good. It's all for Nagisa's own good. I'm just protecting him because he doesn't know how to protect himself. When someone doesn't have capacity to make safe decisions there isn't anything wrong with guiding them to saftey, right? right?_

Karma sighed, checking his phone for the hundredth time, re-reading the last message Nagisa had sent; _**I'm sorry that we fought.**_ It said. Karma sighed. what was Nagisa doing right now? Was he safe? Was his mother hurting him? Was Gakushuu messaging him, to try manipulate him? There were so many things out in the world that could hurt Nagisa, Karma was the only one who could protect him from all that.

* * *

 _ **Gakushuu Asano**_

 _ **I know this is sudden, and you have every right to refuse. But can we meet to discuss what we talked about today?**_

Nagisa reread the message over and over, analyzing every word of the text as he sat on the seat of the train. It felt like a break-through, somehow. Does this mean Gakushuu wanted to finally talk and be honest? It wasn't that Nagisa wanted to restart the relationship with him but he wanted to help the other, and if Gakushuu would just open up to him he's sure that he could. On the other hand, Gakushuu could just want to meet up to tell Nagisa off for running his mouth earlier that day, that'd be a lot more in character. Karma wouldn't be happy if he agreed to it.

 _Karma._

Nagisa felt a sudden surge of discomfort at the thought. Karma was just trying to look after him, Nagisa knew that.. But still.. when Karma had held him down on the bed, there was a moment that Nagisa had been afraid. Afraid because Karma had crossed a line. Afraid that Karma really wouldn't let him go. Nagisa sighed, those familiar feelings of guilt welling up inside again; Was he the one doing this to Karma? Was he the one twisting his mind and making him crazy? Was Nagisa doomed to taint anyone who cared about him?

Nagisa typed up a message and sent it to Karma

 _ **I'm sorry that we fought**_ _ **.**_

There was a million other things that he would of liked to of said, but all of them were too difficult to articulate over text, so he sent that short message and nothing more. God. Why did everything have to be so complicated? Nagisa tapped back to his message from Gakushuu, still slightly in disbelief that the other had sent it (Unless of course, Gakushuu really did just want to scold Nagisa again) Would this mean that Nagisa would finally get the answers to those questions that had been burning in his mind for years now; Why had Gakushuu chose to sleep with him? Why did Gakushuu have such strict rules on touch? What was his damage? Nagisa knew Karma wouldn't like it, but he replied to Gakushuu;

 _ **If you just want to tell me off for running my mouth and tell me to shut up, you can do that over text. I'm sorry I brought up things you aren't comfortable with today. It wont happen again.**_

Nagisa sent the message, feeling a strange jittery sensation. Being assertive towards Gakushuu always gave him a rush of nerves, even though he'd been doing it more and more lately. Just then, the train ground to a halt outside Nagisa's stop. He stepped off the packed carriage onto the platform, breathing in the cold night air and shivering. It wasn't even that late, but it was dark out by now, with only the neon street lights illuminating station with an eerie orange glow. Nagisa was swamped by the crowd of passengers leaving the train. he kept his head down and threw his hood over his hair as he walked in the direction of home.

* * *

Luckily, Nagisa's mother was in a surprisingly good mood when she arrived home, a few minutes after Nagisa himself had. She danced around the kitchen preparing dinner with a wide smile on her face and a spring in her step. At times like these, the atmosphere was bright and Nagisa was able to feel a little lighter than usual. However, the knowledge that this happy moment could be shattered by one wrong move pervaded everything, Nagisa always had some lingering anxiety that he would do something bad and entice his mother's rage, which could come on as suddenly as a storm.

However, she remained in a good mood all evening, asking Nagisa how he'd done at school, telling him all about her work life, Nagisa liked to savor moments like this because he wasn't sure when they'd come again.

It was when Nagisa was in his room catching up on homework that his phone vibrated, indicating he had received a reply from Gakushuu.

 _ **No, I don't just want to threaten you into silence. I want to really talk. I want to answer your questions and there are things I have wanted to tell you for years now.**_

Nagisa's breath almost caught in his throat. Was this really happening? Or was it a ploy to get Nagisa back in a romantic way? Nagsia knew Gakushuu could be manipulative, but using an underhand tactic like that wasn't like him.

 _ **Just so you know, I'm not ever going to get back with you in a sexual way because that wont be good for either of us. But if you really do just want to talk just tell me when and where.**_

Nagisa replied. He wanted to keep some boundaries after all. Gakushuu texted back almost instantly.

 _ **GA**_ : _**Just come as soon as convenient to you. At my house. Do you know where that is?**_

 _ **NS:**_ _ **Of course, I've been there enough times.**_

Nagisa visited Gakushuu's house several times during the summers in high school, since his father had a tendency to go on long business trips. Gakushuu had a huge house that was empty and desolate somehow, his room was the same; It was more like an awards cabinet than a place were a teenage boy lived. Did Gakushuu really think that Nagisa had forgotten where he lived? Gakushuu always had treated him like an idiot. _As soon as is convenient to you._ How soon _could_ Nagisa see Gakushuu? the smart thing to do would be to say wait until school tomorrow but part of him wanted to speak to Gakushuu _right now_ before he changed his mind about being open with Nagisa. Before he could decide on an answer to 'when' he received another message.

 _ **GA;**_ _ **By the way, what exactly do you mean when you say you don't think we're good for each other?**_

Nagisa frowned at that message- Was he serious? Gakushuu may not exactly be the most emotionally-intelligent person in the world, but he should recognise how dysfunctional their relationship is without Nagisa having to spell it out. Again.

 _ **NS:** **Because you never treated me as an equal. Only as a convenience.**_

 _ **GA:**_ _ **And you never enjoyed that?**_

Nagisa blushed upon reading the message. Seriously? Was this some kind of booty call?

 **NS: You hit me, that's a pretty good sign we're bad for each other. Anyway I don't want to talk about sex with you. I want to help you, and our previous relationship wasn't helping either of us.**

 **GA** _ **: What makes you think I need help?**_

 **NS:** **Like I said before, I think the two of us are alike in some ways. I've been in bad places enough to recognize when someone else is too. You'll be surprised how much better you could feel if you just speak to someone and I'm used to keeping your secrets.**

 **GA: I want to feel better.**

 **NS : I can come over now.**

 **GA: Thank you Nagisa. **

Nagisa knew this was a bad idea, but he'd wanted the opportunity to help the other for years and he was finally being aloud to. He wondered what had made Gakushuu suddenly want to speak to him about his problems after years of silence? Was it the shock of Nagisa breaking it off with him? Or was it Nagisa's questioning earlier? Or had something else happened that had triggered Gakushuu opening up? Silently, Nagisa pulled on his coat and headed out his bedroom door slowly, careful not to make a sound. He glanced at his mother's bedroom door. She slept using a prescription of diazepam and wine, she wouldn't be waking up any time soon, but Nagisa still felt nervous about breaking the rules. _Karma would be furious about this!_ Nagisa realised as he stepped out of the apartment door, shivering when the cold hit him like a wall. _I'll make him understand_ Nagisa tried to assure himself.

Not really sure what to expect, Nagisa headed out into the night.

* * *

Karma had been feeling shitty ever since his confrontation with Nagisa resulting in the other leaving so he had decided to cheer himself up by grabbing his favourite strawberry flavoured drink from the convenience store (No! They aren't just for kids, okay?). Why didn't Nagisa understand that he didn't owe any of the shitty people in his life loyalty? How could Karma break him free from the grasp of his bitch of a mother?

These thoughts swirled around his head angrily as he headed home, juice carton in hand. Karma had decided to take a short-cut home through the park. During the day it was a vibrant place full of people, but of a night it was eerily deserted and a notorious place for criminal activity to take place- but that didn't scare the teen. Leaves crunched under his feet as he walked and it was cold enough for the cloudy puffs of his breath to be visible, but Karma didn't pay any mind to that; He was focused solely on the conflict raging on in his mind. That was, until, he saw the solitary figure of sitting on one of the benches a little way ahead.

Karma stopped suddenly as he began to recognise who it was. _No way. It couldn't be. hadn't he had enough bad luck for today?;_ But much to Karma's horror, even under the distorting light of dim street lamp, that strawberry blond hair was unmistakable. Gakushuu Asano. His posture wasn't in it's usual perfect state, he was hunched over as if to protect himself from the cold, a paper back book was clutched in his hands, and his violet eyes were fixed on the pages intently. Even from this distance, Karma could tell the other was still wearing his uniform. _So he hasn't been home yet?_ Karmagrinned sardonically- It was 10.30pm, past the local curfew time for under 18's. If the police found someone in a school uniform they'd be in trouble.

Gakushuu still hadn't noticed him, so Karma decided to have some fun with this situation. He was still pissed off at Gakushuu for hurting Nagisa, not just for hitting him, but for using him for years, then having the audacity to send Nagisa a message asking to 'talk' to him, as if Nagisa owed him anything after how badly Gakushuu had treated him. He'd probably solidified Nagisa's warped view of relationships forever. unfortently he couldn't do anything too bad or else Nagisa would hate him for it.

With sadistic intentions in mind, Karma began to approach to back of the bench.

* * *

It was freezing cold. So cold that Gakushuu's fingers had become completely numb and even turning the pages of his book had become difficult. He was currently experiencing the type of coldness were it was physically painful, like thousands of tiny pinpricks were jabbing you and your blood was freezing solid beneath your skin, making your bones ache and shudder.

But he still didn't want to go home. After school he'd gone to the library and stayed until it had closed, then he'd camped out at a tiny cafe until _that_ closed. Most places didn't serve minors after 10 because of the stupid curfew, Gakushuu could usually pass for older than 18, but not when he was wearing his uniform. However, getting a change of clothing would require going home, which would defeat the whole point of staying out in the first place, so he was stuck here, sat on park bench in the freezing cold, probably catching hypothermia. Oh well. Hypothermia was likely preferable to what was awaiting him at home. His father was furious. Even now, the man's threat still lingered in his mind.

 _"I will make you regret your actions."_

The Chairman was very good at sticking to what he said, Gakushuu had no doubt in his mind that in the end he'd regret every second he ever spent with Nagisa Shiota because of the consequences he'd inevitably endure. The thought made him shiver with fear. He knew he had to stay home at some point; He was just delaying the inevitable since there was no escaping the Chairman. But the terror inside him meant that Gakushuu couldn't bring himself to leave this bench to walk home and face his father.

So he just sat there, attempting to focus on a book he was too cold to read. Suddenly, out of nowhere, Gakushuu felt someone behind him clamp a hand over his mouth, and another hand grabbed his arm. He instantly went into panic mode, struggling violently and pulling away from his attacker with all his strength. He managed to escape their grip, jumping up from the park bench quickly, only to hear familiar taunting laughter.

"Your reactions are pretty quick. I'm impressed." The voice said, with a casual arrogance. "What's less impressive is that you were oblivious enough to allow me to sneak up on you in the first place."

Gakushuu turned to glare at the other, feeling a mixture of humiliation and irritation as he confirmed what he already knew; Karma Akabane. The bastard was lent against the back of the bench as if he didn't have a care in the world, but there was a sharp look in his amber eyes.

"Akabane. Do you have nothing better to do than to harass people?" Gakushuu hissed. The fact Karma had actually managed to sneak up and scare him pissed him off. He hated being in a weaker position in any capacity. _What on earth did Akabane want, anyway?_

"You were the one sat all alone in a dodgy part of town in the middle of night. You were practically asking for trouble." Karma snickered. "You looked like you were about to piss yourself. You aren't so tough when your opponent isn't somebody far weaker than you, are you?"

Gakushuu knew what Karma was referring to. The time he'd hit Nagisa. Gakushuu didn't have a response to that, because truth be told, he was ashamed by his own actions. There was no point denying it happened now either, since it was only the two of them there. Karma walked around the bench, so that it was no longer a barrier between the two and approached Gakushuu.

"You know, there's nobody around in hearing distance and there's no security cameras either. If someone were to get hurt here, nobody would find them for hours, and by then it may be too late~" Karma said in a singsong voice. Gakushuu recognized the scare tactic.

"You better be careful not to hurt yourself then, Akabane." Gakushuu countered, his violet eyes flickering up to meet the others. If Akabane thought he was going to act scared or back down, he had another thing coming. A violent electricity seemed to crackle between the two of them; Gakushuu was well aware that he wasn't in the best position for a fight- His body was numb with cold and he felt slightly weak from not eating but part of him _wanted_ to fight anyway, even though it was illogical, it seemed cathartic. Out here in the middle of nowhere with nobody but a delinquent reject, he didn't have to wear that mask of perfection that was constantly glued on his face. He felt a ripple of excitement as he realised he had the freedom to go wild and let out all his negative emotions without it effecting his reputation.

"I don't think one little tap to the face is _really_ punishment enough for all the shitty things you've done to Nagisa." Karma said, approaching Gakushuu, squaring up to him. Gakushuu clenched his fists, suddenly wanting nothing more than to smash Akabane's face in. Or have his own face smashed in. At this point he didn't care, he just wanted things to break.

"Well. What are you going to do about it?" Gakushuu challenged. "You're Nagisa's latest fuck so your playing the part of the white knight in shining armor now, aren't you?"

"I suggest you speak with a little more respect." Karma said through gritted teeth, still managing to keep grinning despite the threat. Gakushuu laughed sounding wild and delirious.

"Respect? I'm sorry, I find it hard to show respect for someone who so clearly doesn't respect himself." Gakushuu said. Once again, he was back to his habit of degrading Nagisa to make himself feel better. He knew he'd feel guilty about it later, but at the moment it felt good. He met Karma's eyes. "You _must_ know what I'm talking about. Nagisa lets you do _anything_ if you know what I mean."

"Shut up." Karma warned, Gakushuu fixed him a searching look.

"Or could it be that you actually _don't_ know what I mean?" Gakushuu taunted. "Don't tell me you two haven't actually slept together yet? Nagisa spreads his legs to easily I don't know what on earth you could be doing wrong."

Karma's expression told Gakushuu everything he needed to know. Gakushuu wasn't sure why, but the knowledge that Nagisa hadn't actually slept with Karma made him feel happy somehow ( _But it's not like he had been jealous! not in a million years!)_

And then the floodgates opened. Karma went in for a punch first, Gakushuu didn't either bother to dodge he just took it, straight to the stomach. It hurt, but in that moment, Gakushuu was no longer thinking about his father or about Nagisa, or about how he ruined everything good he touched.

Without wasting a second, Gakushuu leaned back slightly and headbutted Karma in the nose. As someone trained in martial arts It was the type of reckless move he would never usually use but right now he just wanted to destroy things. His own forehead rang with pain as Karma fell back, blood gushing from his nose. Gakushuu let out a satisfied chuckle that bordered on deranged as he drew back his fist to punch Karma in his face.

"You aren't so perfect and refined when nobody's watching, are you?" Karma hissed, quickly wiping the blood away from his nose. He hadn't wanted this fight to get too violent; Nagisa wouldn't be happy with him if he hurt the bastard too badly, but Asano was more of a beast than he'd first thought he was. No matter. Karma had been in enough fights not to let some prissy pretty boy beat him.

He grabbed Gakushuu's wrist in one hand and took a handful of hair in the other before quickly slamming the other into the ground with so much force he almost bounced. That should do it. Karma grinned when the other didn't move.

"You have a long way to go before you are even close to being on par with m- " Karma was cut off when a hand reached out and suddenly dragged him to the floor. The next thing he knew, he was on his back and Gakushuu had crawled on top off him. He almost saw stars when he was punched in the face. The expression on the other's face was one he hadn't seen before- it was one of reckless abandon, of a man lost at sea who was happy to be drowning. _But to hell if Karma was going to loose to a square like him!_

In one swift move, Karma reversed their positions so that he was on top, and Gakushuu was the one being pressed into the cold hard floor. Raising his fist, he returned the favour by smashing it hard into the other's face. But that wild look of abandon in Gakushuu's eyes never faltered. At the moment, he didn't care if he was being hurt, so long as it meant he didn't have to think about his worries. Breathing heavily, he went to hit Karma yet again, only to have both wrists grabbed.

Karma could feel the other shaking in his grip, from cold or from adrenaline, he wasn't sure. Even though the battle was clearly in Karma's favour, the other didn't seem to care. He just kept trying to struggle out of his grip like a wild animal. This fight was _not_ going the way Karma had planned it; He thought he'd knock the snob around a little, scare him a bit, then head home. This was just unnerving and Karma wanted it over.

Karma twisted Gakushuu's arm at a painful angle. The other winced but didn't stop struggling.

"Lie still or I'll break your fucking arm." Karma hissed, his voice dangerous and low. That threat usually scared people into submitting, but not this time. Gakushuu just kept thrashing around like a caged animal.

"Well. Go on. Do it you coward!" Gakushuu growled at him. Karma blanched; He was used to being the most unhinged one, this was foreign territory to him. He tried to make the bluff more convincing, pulling Gakushuu's arm to a more extreme angle, which produced more pained cries but no less struggling. The Gakushuu beneath him was covered in blood and bruises, his skin was deathly pale from the cold, his uniform ruffled and his hair slightly muddy from rolling around in the dirt. Karma wished he could take a picture so he could show his legions of loyal followers what they're leader is really like.

"The more I get to know you, the more fucked up I realise you are. And I thought I had issues." Karma said, still managing to keep a disarming smile on his face, despite his harsh words. "That's why I want you to stay away from Nagisa. That includes over message- stop texting him asking him to 'talk' with you. Nagisa might see the best in everyone, but I can see right through you, you sleazy bastard. You just want to fuck him."

Gakushuu actually stopped struggling at Karma's words and fixed him and quizzical look. "texting?"

"Don't play stupid." Karma commanded. "I saw that text you send him this evening practically begging him to come and talk to you. You really are a slimy manipulative bastard, you know that!"

"I didn't send him any such text tonight! I don't even have my phone, my father confiscat- " Gakushuu cut himself off when he made a horrible realisation and his blood ran cold. During break time at school, Gakushuu had been called up to his father's office. He half expected to be choked again, or at least hit, but his father's only command was that he hand over his phone and laptop. _If you've been sneaking around behind my back then I need to pay closer attention to who you're messaging, don't I?_ It felt like a complete invasion of privacy to have to hand over his devices but Gakushuu knew there was no point arguing since his father would get them one way or another. So if Nagisa was getting texts of 'Gakushuu' asking to meet up that meant.. it was his father sending them.

His earlier feelings of abandon evaporated from Gakushuu's body as swiftly as they came, and he was suddenly filled with nothing but pure dread.

"What's up with you? Are you having a seizure?" Karma asked, mildly concerned by Gakushuu suddenly freezing up as if he'd short circuited. Gakuhshuu didn't reply, he simply pushed the other off himself as forcefully as he could manage, then pulled himself to his feet and grabbed his bag. Gakushuu looked as if he'd seen a ghost. Karma had no idea what had just happened. He grabbed the other's arm as he turned to walk away.

"I wasn't finished speaking to you." Karma hissed, but instead of rising to the challenge like he had done before, Gakushuu just silently pulled away that scared look in his eyes as he hurried off into the night.

Karma watched him go, a deep frown on his face _What the hell had just happened?_

* * *

 ** _DUN DUN DUUUN! Nagisa has been lead into a trap! Sorry for people who actually thought it was Gakushuu asking for help.. but no, it isn't that simple._**

 ** _The text conversation between Nagisa and the Chairman pretending to be Gakushuu was basically the Chairman trying to get as much information about Gakushuu and Nagisa's relationship as possible, without scaring Nagisa off. (That's why he asked if Nagisa had been to the house or not)._**

 ** _So this chapter ends with Nagisa being en-route to the Chairman's place with Gakuhsuu just clocking on what has happened. Karma is still in the dark, but he knows that something is wrong._**

 ** _Thank you to all the reviews! please review to tell me what you thought and what you think should/could happen_**

 ** _Nekohex; Sorry that Gakushuu wasn't really trying to open up to Nagisa ;_; Hope you like this chapter._**

 ** _Miss Ena; Thanks for reviewing. I like angsty fics too_**

People believe what they want to believe.


	14. Chapter 14

**Major trigger warning for the start of this chapter, although it's nothing worse than what has previously happened in this story. Thank you for all the reviews.**

* * *

Gakushuu felt as if his lungs were being filled with flames with ever breath he took. His heart was hammering, his limbs were aching and his could feel sweat dripping off his forehead. His hands were still shaky, but as the adrenaline ran out the pain from were Akabane had hit him became more and more noticeable. _Still._ He kept running without stopping even for a second even as his breath became more ragged and his legs became weaker.

 _Nagisa. I have to make it home before the Chairman lures him in._

It was late enough for the bus and train service to have stopped for the night, so Gakushuu had no choice but to run home. Even calling for a cab wasn't an option; The waiting time was longer than it would take him to run home at full speed. The street lights blurred as he passed them, pedestrians gave him confused looks, but Gakushuu didn't care; All he cared about now was getting home before the Chairman managed to do anything to Nagisa.

* * *

 _This is a stupid idea._ Nagisa thought as he walked along the street full of large houses en route to Gakushuu's place. _Sneaking out of home late in the middle of winter to meet an Ex in secret is a stupid idea.. what if mother notices I'm gone? I don't even want to think about what would happen.. And Karma the (person I'm currently seeing!) wont be happy. He'll get angry again._

Nagisa sighed, shoving those thoughts to the back of his head. There was no point in letting them consume him now.. He'd already made his choice. He was choosing to help Gakushuu, there was no going back now.

 **I want to feel better.**

Gakushuu's text ran through Nagisa's head over and over again. He had a lot of mixed feelings about it; Obviously, he didn't like the idea of Gakushuu feeling bad, but the fact the other was asking for help filled Nagisa with a sense of hope because Gakushuu was finally, _finally_ reaching out to another person after all these years. Nagisa didn't know exactly what problems Gakushuu was facing in his life, but he could guess; Perfectionism, overwhelming pressure to do well both internally and externally.. a questionable parent. Gakushuu's relationship with the Chairman was one subject he explicitly never spoke about, but it didn't seem normal to say the least.. Nagisa wondered if it was as dysfunctional as his relationship with his mother. Admittedly, he could never imagine the Chairman staging a suicide attempt to guilt-trip his son, but Nagisa knew there were other ways that parents could scar their children.

Lost in thought, Nagisa almost walked past Gakushuu's house. He stopped suddenly, realizing he was here; The large, eerie blandness of it was unmistakable. Nagisa gulped before walking down the path towards the front door. Gakushuu had instructed him over text just to knock on the front door. It took Nagisa a moment to gather his courage before doing so; Something about that large oak door, currently a ghostly silver colour in the moonlight, seemed terrifying.

 _Man up! How are you supposed to help someone face their problems if you can't face knocking on a door!_

With one last deep breath, Nagisa knocked on the door, the sound reverberating throughout the house. Silently, he waited in the cold for an answer.

The door seemed to open almost instantly, but the one stood there wasn't Gakushuu. No. It was a taller, larger figure with darker hair and a suit on; Stood before Nagisa was non other than the school Chairman himself, Gakuho Asano. Nagisa couldn't help but let out a strangled gasp. He felt his stomach twist with a sick sense of shock, a feeling similar to when you miss a step. He backed away a few steps on instinct, almost tripping over backwards.

"I didn't mean to startle you." The Chairman said, with a relaxed smile, looking vaguely amused at Nagisa freaking out. "I assume you are here to see Asano?"

"Ah- Um. Yes. I am. Sir." Nagisa choked out. He did _not_ expect to see the Chairman here. The fact that Gakushuu had invited him over made Nagisa assume the Chairman was out somewhere, because that was how it had always been in the past. "I can leave- if it's a bad time.. I know it's late."

The Chairman only chuckled at Nagisa's garbling. "And have you come all this way for nothing? I wont here of it. Asano is inside. Please do come in." The Chairman said with an amiable smile. Nagisa wasn't sure about this whole situation, but Gakuho Asano was the type of man who's requests you just couldn't refuse, so still feeling like he'd missed a step and fallen down the rabbit hole, Nagisa stepped inside the house.

The house was as fancy as always with it's simplistic yet stylish interior decor with cool, neutral colours. It always reminded Nagisa of a hotel, because it was obviously fancy but very impersonal. There were no unique decorations and certainly no family photographs. Anyone could live here. As soon as he walked in, Nagisa felt his teeth set on edge. He had an awful foreboding as if he were walking deeper into a spider's trap- _Was the Chairman going to scold him and call his mother because he'd been wandering around after curfew? Was he in trouble?_ Nagisa had no idea, he felt as if he had no choice but to silently follow the man deeper into this labyrinth known as the Asano's home. He was lead down the hall through a door he'd never been through before (Gakushuu had only ever taken Nagisa straight to his room).

"You look nervous." The Chairman commented without even turning to glance back at Nagisa. Nagisa jumped at the sudden break in silence, finding himself scrambling to process the words and find the right answer.

"I- yeah." Nagisa answered lamely, taking a deep breath. He couldn't see the Chairman's face, but he was sure he was grinning at Nagisa's nervous response. Once again, silence set in as Nagisa was lead into another room. He had no idea what was going on or What the Chairman wanted. He could only imagine that he was in trouble for coming to visit so late.

The Chairman stopped when they reached what appeared to be a living room. It was small and was actually cosy-looking; There was thick red carpet underfoot and a cream white sofa there were wooden cabinets along the side which were lined with ornaments and pictures. There was more of a personal touch in this room than there was in the entire rest of the house combined.

"Sit." The Chairman commanded simply, indicating to the plush cream sofa in the middle of the room. Nagisa bit his lip and once again felt compelled to follow the Chairman's command. Tentatively he walked over and plopped himself on the sofa, pulling his arms into his chest to make himself as small as possible. _What's going on? Where is Gakushuu_ Nagisa glanced around the room at the small collection of pictures on the cabinet; The first one he noticed was the picture of a much younger Gakuho in a suit, next to him stood a beautiful western woman with blond hair and blue eyes. _That must be Gakushuu's mother. He's never mentioned her before._ Her high cheekbones, fair skin and long lashes reminded Nagisa of Gakushuu.

"It's awfully late for you to be coming out here to visit." The Chairman commented, breaking Nagisa away from his train of thought. "Do your parents know that you're here."

Nagisa briefly considered lying but then thought better of it. The Chairman would easily be able to verify if he was speaking the truth. "No." He admitted. "My mother doesn't know I'm out the house."

"You shouldn't hide things from your parent." The Chairman scolded, grin still in place. Nagisa was expecting him to call his mother or something, but instead he just opened one of the cabinets and pulled out a crystal bottle full of liquid and poured it into a glass, also produced from the cabinet. He passed the drink to Nagisa, who took it.

"oh- I'm not thirsty.." Nagisa tried to say, but the Chairman cut him off.

"You're a guest. I'm not rude enough to allow a guest to go without a drink." The Chairman said insistently. "it's just fruit juice. Drink."

Nagisa glanced at the cloudy amber liquid in the glass, before drinking. It tasted like normal juice, if not a little saltier than usual. "Thank you." he mumbled. looking down at the floor and not at the man stood over him.

"You only mentioned your mother. So you come from a single parent family?" The Chairman asked. Nagisa blinked at the incredibly personal question.

"Um- yes. My father left a few years ago." Nagisa admitted, not feeling comfortable in the slightest discussing this. His father's departure may of been years ago, but it was still raw in his mind. Keen to change the subject, Nagisa said. "If you don't mind me asking.. were is Gakushuu?"

"You two must be close if you call him by his given name." The Chairman commented. Nagisa almost choked on his drink as he realised his slip of the tongue (He was only supposed to call Gakushuu that when it was just the two of them). "He doesn't usually allow people to address him so informally."

"Not really- I mean. We're not really all that close." Nagisa said, feeling at a loss. He took another large sip of the drink in an attempt to calm down. "He just helps me with my school work, occasionally."

"He must like you then. Asano normally only helps those from his own class." The Chairman mused. Before Nagisa could protest that, the Chairman continued. "How did you two come to know each other? I've never heard Asano mention you before"

"We were in the light music club together in middle school." Nagisa answered almost automatically. He realised that the Chairman hadn't answered his question about Gakushuu's whereabouts and he felt stupid asking him again. "- I should go, it's late."

"You're right. It is late. It isn't safe for you to be wondering the streets by yourself, something could happen. Wont your mother worry if she wakes up in the morning and you're not there?" The Chairman said.

"She'd probably just think I was at school." Nagisa said without thinking. He was doing that a lot this conversation. For some reason his tongue felt looser. "I mean.. I wont go wandering around at night again, I'm sorry."

An awkward silence followed his words and the Chairman stared at Nagisa with an intent purple glare. Nagisa squirmed under his gaze, feeling like an insect under scrutiny. Well, at least now he knew were Gakushuu learned all his intimidation tactics whenever he wanted Nagisa to feel powerless or uneasy.

"I wonder what my son see's in you?" The Chairman said suddenly, causing Nagisa once again to almost choke on his drink. "To take the time to _tutor_ you specifically."

"I.. don't know." Nagisa replied. The atmosphere in this room was so suffocating he was starting to get lightheaded. He bit the bullet and asked again. "Where is Gakushuu?"

"He'll be here soon." The Chairman said offhandedly. He took a step closer to Nagisa. "I'm curious; what do you think of my son?"

"He's um.. Very clever. A good leader. You must of raised him well" Nagisa replied, forcing in a compliment at the end for formalities sake. He wasn't sure why but it was getting harder and harder to find the right words. It felt as if there was a disconnection between his brain and his mouth, as if he were moving in slow motion. He wasn't sure what the Chairman's game was, why he was trying to engage him in conversation rather than _doing_ something. _And were the hell was Gakushuu anyway?_

"It seems we have a differing of opinion. I think he's an overemotional fool who can't do anything by himself. He's always been too sensitive and needy" The Chairman said coldly. Nagisa wasn't sure what to reply to that one, his head was swimming far too much for that but he did know that 'overemotional' 'sensitive' and 'clingy' weren't words _he'd_ ever apply to Gakushuu. He must still be sick because he was suddenly feeling very tired. All his energy was put into staying awake and sat up. _It was late after all._ "But I did create him, so he belongs to me, and I don't _like_ other people touching my things without permission."

"What?" Nagisa said weakly. It was a struggle to keep his eyes open and keep upright. His body felt light as if it was floating in space. Nothing felt real, Nagisa felt like a character from a play, detached from himself somehow. He was vaguely aware that the Chairman was still talking to him, but his words were impossible to follow when Nagisa was feeling as if he were suspended in the air. _This isn't right, this isn't normal._

"If you belong to him, by extension you also belong to me." The Chairman's disembodied voice was saying maliciously.

Suddenly Nagisa could feel strong, unfamiliar hands grabbing at him and could see the Chairman's face right in front of him. Logically, he knew he should be terrified and try to fight back, but his body felt like a unmovable, lime a lame puppet with the strings cut. His emotions felt cut off too, he watched impassively as his body was moved against his will. In his last few moments of consciousness, Nagisa realised something. The drink the Chairman had gave him.. it was spiked.

* * *

 **The Chairman used rohypnol on Nagisa. Yeah, Date-rape drugs. This story has gotten that low but it wasn't ever exactly a cheerful story. Also sorry Karma wasn't in this chapter, but he will be in the next one.**

 **I was surprised by all the reviews I got last chapter! I hope that means people enjoyed the twist last chapter. Thank you to everyone who takes the time to review it makes me think this story is worth while writing. Please let me know what you thought of this chapter and what you think could or should happen next chapter.**

 **Reply to guest reviews;**

 **Guest: I really liked writing the fight scene between Gakushuu and karma so I'm happy you enjoyed reading it.**

 **NekoHex: I'm glad you liked the twist! Thank you for your consistent reviews.**


	15. Chapter 15

**Thank you for the reviews!**

 **I know I start almost every chapter with a warning, but I think this chapter might be marginally more explicit than any previous chapters. I try to keep everything implied (and it mostly is), but for the sake of the narrative there are some things I need to write so the story makes sense. Still, I would say this is still on the T rating (even if it is on the very edge).**

 **The very bad stuff is all at the very end of this chapter, so if you want to skip it, do it.**

* * *

Karma was stuck with the vague feeling that something wasn't right. Of course, he already knew that lots of things weren't right in his life right now; He'd been kicked out of multiple schools and was currently on suspended for violence, his best friend and maybe boyfriend was being abused by his mother, his parents had basically abandoned him, he had serious anger issues and he was smart enough to work out that he probably had some sort of attachment issues and Nagisa hadn't replied to his texts. But even on top of all that, ever since returning home after his fight with Gakushuu, Karma had felt that something _else_ wasn't right.

 _"The more I get to know you, the more fucked up I realise you are. And I thought I had issues." Karma said, still managing to keep a disarming smile on his face, despite his harsh words. "That's why I want you to stay away from Nagisa. That includes over message- stop texting him asking him to 'talk' with you. Nagisa might see the best in everyone, but I can see right through you, you sleazy bastard. You just want to fuck him."_

 _Gakushuu actually stopped struggling at Karma's words and fixed him and quizzical look. "texting?"_

 _"Don't play stupid." Karma commanded. "I saw that text you send him this evening practically begging him to come and talk to you. You really are a slimy manipulative bastard, you know that!"_

 _"I didn't send him any such text tonight! I don't even have my phone, my father confiscat- " Gakushuu cut himself off._

Karma played the interaction over and over again in his mind. No matter how he looked at it, Gakushuu had been genuine when denying he'd texted Nagisa. But Karma had seen the text with his own eyes so a message had been sent from Gakushuu's phone, no doubt about that. But if it wasn't Gakushuu, then who had sent it? And why? Karma was drawing a blank at that. Part of him hoped that Gakushuu had been lying and was just incredibly convincing. Better the devil you know, after all..

 _my father confiscat- "_

Gakushuu was about to say his father had confiscated his phone, Karma was sure of it. Does that mean the Chairman was the one in possession of the phone? Why would he be texting Nagisa pretending to be his son? The Chairman had a reputation for being strange, but even for him that was odd. Why would Gakushuu have his phone confiscated in the first place for that matter, Karma was sure that square wasn't the type to go around breaking rules and getting into trouble.

Unless.

 _Unless._

The pieces all fit together in Karma's mind; Why Gakushuu had his phone confiscated, why the Chairman was messaging Nagisa specifically, why Gakushuu had been outside so late sulking as if he didn't want to go home and how unhinged he'd been during the fight as if he had nothing to lose. The Chairman must know about the two of them, Karma realised with a jolt, it was the only logical explanation he could think off. Karma had a swirling of mixed feelings at this revelation; Initially he felt a surge of malicious satisfaction that Gakushuu's dirty secret had been revealed _I bet that was humiliating, Mr perfect._ but next he felt worry sweep over him as he began to think of Nagisa; What if he get's in trouble? What if the Chairman wants to threaten him into silence to avoid a scandal?

With a slight twinge of guilt, Karma did something he knew was wrong; When Nagisa had been asleep at Karma's house earlier that day, Karma, unable to resist had looked through Nagisa's phone. He _knew_ it was an invasion of privacy, he _knew_ he was stepping over a boundary but Karma had done it anyway. He had read through Nagisa's messages (Demanding ones from his mother, curt messages from Gakushuu spanning months, friendly conversations with his friends Sugino and Kayano). But that wasn't the _worst_ thing Karma did. While Nagisa was still sleeping, Karma installed an App on his phone and linked it to his. It was a tracking App and it allowed Karma to track Nagisa's phone from his.

 _I know this seems possessive, but I'm just protecting him! What if Nagisa gets in trouble, I need to know where he is! I'm not being controlling or abusive I'm just looking out for him._ Karma told himself as he loaded up the tracking app to check Nagisa's location. If he was at home and in bed were he was _meant_ to be then Karma would stop fretting, he told himself.

But Nagisa wasn't. To Karma's horror, Nagisa's location was not in his own home, rather, it was in a house a mile or so away. _What the hell is he doing there?_ Karma thought, worried, _I bet that is Asano's house!_ He realised, feeling a flash of white hot anger course through him.

Karma jumped up off the sofa he'd been sitting on so quickly he toppled the ottoman and without a second's delay he rushed into the cupboard to grab his coat, pulling it off the hanger so violently it almost ripped before storming out the front door.

 _Well, I suppose it's time to pay my regards at the Asano's residence. Or wherever the hell Nagisa is._

* * *

Asano had rushed all the way home so fast that his legs felt numb and his lungs felt raw but as soon as he reached his own front door, he froze. All the adrenaline and determination coursing through his veins seemed to fade away leaving behind only shaky exhaustion. He felt weak. _You are worrying over nothing, Nagisa wouldn't come out to see you this late even if he thought it was you asking. Especially not after you 'broke up'. He wont be here. The Chairman wouldn't have a chance to harm him yet, now you can warn him before that happens_ His optimistic side said. Gakushuu desperately wanted that to be true. Holding on to that fragile sense of hope, he turned his key in and opened the door.

It was warm inside the house. Gakushuu's hands and feet were icy cold from being outside for so long, the feeling was pleasant. It was quiet too, no cries of pain or sounds of fighting- maybe everything was okay. But then, Gakushuu looked down and saw a pair of small brown boots on the shoe rack. His heart sunk in his chest.. Nagisa was here.

Not even bothering to take his shoes off, Gakushuu ran through the house with single minded determination. First he opened the door to the kitchen- empty, then the dining room- empty. _Where the hell are they?_

"Asano, so nice of you to finally join us." The Chairman's voice rang out. he had suddenly appeared outside the door of the lounge, a devious glint in his eyes. He looked his son up and down in disdain, taking in his disheveled appearance; Uniform dirty from fighting on the floor with Karma, hair windswept from running, face flushed and with bruises beginning to form and _shoes on in the house!_ "What on earth happened to you. You look disgusting."

Asano hardly even noticed the insult, he just glared at his father. "Where is he?" He asked through gritted teeth. It was taking all his self preservation not to lunge at the man. "Where is Nagisa?"

His father chuckled. "Very occasionally, you surprise me, Asano. Tell me, how did you work out young Mr Shiota is here? It was supposed to be a surprise."

"Stop playing games! Don't drag Nagisa into this. This should be between us!" Gakushuu hissed. He wasn't sure what ' _This'_ was exactly, all he knew was that he didn't want other people dragged into the game of cat and mouse played between him and his father. The Chairman fixed him a quizzical look.

"It wasn't _me_ who dragged Nagisa into this- It was _you_ , Asano. You chose to involve him in this, not me. Therefore anything that happens to him of a consequence of that is your fault." The Chairman said simply. Gakushuu couldn't help but feel crushed under the weight of those words; _It's true. What was I thinking. How could I of dragged someone else into my life and put them in danger. I never told Nagisa what he's getting into._ The Chairman grinned, satisfied when he saw that familiar look of guilt on his son's face.

"Where is he?" Gakushuu repeated again. He never thought his father would hurt someone else to hurt him, but it turns out he'd once again underestimated the man's cruelty.

"Follow me." The Chairman said simply, opening the door and walking through it. He didn't turn his back on Gakushuu completely though, because he knew the boy would likely take any opening as an opportunity to strike while he was in this emotional state. Gakushuu had no choice to follow, his nerves tightened like a coil that could spring at any moment. The Chairman lead him to his private. It was a room that was usually locked and Gakushuu was rarely allowed to enter, in fact, he hadn't done in years.

The decor inside surprised him- It wasn't the usual cold interior that marked the rest of the house, there was actual _family pictures!_ But as soon as Gakushuu saw who was on the sofa, all thoughts about the design of the room faded away.

"Nagisa!" He cried, almost forgetting that his father was there. He was over to the boy who lay limp across the sofa, his pale complexion looking almost waxy in the light of the fire. Nagisa didn't stir, he looked still, too still. Gakushuu feared the worst for a split second as he knelt next to him, but then Nagisa opened his eyes, revealing hazy blue orbs. Gakushuu felt a temporary rush of relief. Nagisa was strewn across the sofa, his hair free from it's ties fanned out around him, his clothes looked rustled.

"K- arma?" He croaked out, his voice sounding slurred and disorientated. Gakushuu was too alarmed to be annoyed that he'd been mistaken for _that red-headed delinquent._

 _"_ What have you done to him?" Gakushuu snapped, turning to glare at his father. The Man gave his son a dark look.

"Are you sure you want to know?" He said, a dangerous edge to his voice. Before adding. "The reason he's so disorientated is that I gave him something with the formula of C16H12FN3O3. Can you tell me what that is, Asano?"

Gakushuu stared at him incredulous- Was he really being quizzed at a time like this as if he were in chemistry class. It took a moment for him to work it out. "You gave him rohypnol!?" He shouted, now furious. That was a date-rape drug, Gakushuu knew that much. "If you've hurt him, you wont get away with it! You've made a big mistake targeting someone else- He'll go to the authorities and you wont come out from it squeaky clean."

"Are you really attempting to threaten me, Asano? You know the convenient thing about rohypnol is that he wont properly be able to remember anything that happens to him. But that's okay. You can remember for him." The Chairman said, walking across the room towards his two students. Gakushuu was instantly on the defensive, standing up in front of Nagisa protectively. But the Chairman had a casual confidence about him, as if he knew his son was no threat to him.

"You really think I wont tell him? That I wont support him to go the authorities?" Gakushuu challenged, Nagisa was stirring weakly behind him, watching the scene with impassive eyes.

"Do you really think that's such a good idea? To let him know what's happened to him? It will destroy any chance of him coming out of this without being traumatized." The Chairman said, stopping right in front of his son, looking down on him. Gakushuu was only an inch or two away from his height now, but the elder still seemed to loom over him.

"Why are you so angry that I slept with him in the first place- " Gakushuu tried, changing tactics to get this whole situation to _stop._ "I'm almost 18 and I'm almost done with highschool. Fairly soon I'll be done living under your rule and I'll do whatever I want and you'll no longer have any legal power to stop me. I'm going to move far away as possible, I don't care if I don't have your money anymore, I'll get a scholarship or something- I wont belong to you forever anyway so trying to punish me for being independent of you is ridiculous."

The Chairman stopped moving, and for a very tiny moment Gakushuu thought he'd actually gotten through to him. But then, Gakuho started laughing. It was a deep, bone-shaking sound.

"Asano, it doesn't matter if you're an adult or not. You're my only son and all that's left of my wife's DNA I wont let you go ever." The Chairman said, a crazed look in his eye. "You are going to go to the university I want you to go to, take the degree I chose for you to take- You'll live were I chose for you to live. Then you'll work were I want you to work and I'll arrange for you to marry who I want you to marry."

"You're insane." Gakushuu hissed, genuinely horrified. "Do you think I'd ever- ever- let you control my whole life. Once I'm 18 I'll do what I want."

"You know I have a lot of _friends_ in the medical field. I would rather not do it, but if you ever tried to cut me out of your life I could easily get them to decide you're mentally unstable and need to spend some time locked away in a hospital." The Chairman said with a light tone. Gakushuu's eyes widened- was his father really threatening to get him sectioned if he didn't comply? "Your mother forced me to do it to her once. She changed her mind about leaving me after a week on the psyche ward."

Gakushuu swallowed, his mouth feeling dry. He couldn't even properly process what he'd just heard at the moment. He knew his father was a monster but he didn't realise just how bad.

"Don't look at me like that." The Chairman said, tutting as if he were chastising a disobedient child. "Aren't you just the same as I am? You like control too. It's easy to see that's why you picked Nagisa Shiota out, because he's so obedient and compliant. I bet you _loved_ that. You loved feeling like you had power over someone, didn't you?"

Gakushuu glared, unable to refute anything the man had said. He hated that the Chairman could see through him so easily.

"Do you know how I got him to come here? I pretended to be you and all I did was ask. It was that simple, even though you two have 'broken up' he still answers to your every beck and call. He's so worried about you, it's almost as adorable as it is pathetic." The Chairman said, enjoying watching Gakushuu squirm. "Although I suppose his sycophant nature isn't the only reason you chose him- He's quite pretty isn't he? He's about the same size you were four years ago; How nostalgic."

"You're disgusting!" Gakushuu snapped on reflex.

"Anyway, enough chit-chat." The Chairman said, briskly, going to pull his son away from Nagisa. "The quicker we start the quicker we can get this over with."

Gakushuu dodged out the way off his hands, still standing in front of Nagisa protectively "Don't touch him." He growled, spreading his arms out and glancing at the male behind him; Nagisa was watching on, but it was unclear in his current state how much he actually understood. The Chairman wasn't deterred by his son trying to stand up to him, in one swift move he grabbed the boy with both hands around his neck and _squeezed_ until he fell unconscious.

Gakushuu woke up a few minutes later. The first thing he noticed was how much his head and his throat hurt. The second thing he noticed was that he couldn't move- He was sat on some sort of chair his arms and legs were bound to it. The third thing he noticed was the two figures across the room from him. One small and one large.

"You put up more of a fight against me from usual." The Chairman commented, displaying his hand; It was covered in bruises and deep scratch marks were Gakushuu had attempted to fight him off. But the teen couldn't even be satisfied about the damage he had caused- his eyes were drawn to the small figure sat helplessly in the Chairman's lap. "

"Please don't." Was all Gakushuu could say, straining his arms to free them from the tape wrapped around them. His rage from earlier had evaporated leaving only helpless desperation. Gakushuu had always told himself he didn't care about Nagisa Shiota, but right now the thought that he was going to be hurt teared his heart apart. He cursed himself as he involuntarily felt his eyes sting with years as he realised he had no way to stop what was going to happen. "Don't touch him."

"You must actually care about him. How pathetic." The Chairman said dismissively. "Now what I want you to remember while you watch me fuck him is that it's your fault this is happening."

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I shouldn't of involved him- It's my fault! I started everything-I lead him into this. So punish me instead!" Gakushuu shouted, desperately. His attempts to move were so vigorous the wooden chair he was sat on tipped and shook. The Chairman was right, it was his fault. He was poison and now he had infected Nagisa too.

"This is an important lesson for you, Asano, about what happens if you try to sneak around behind my back. Nagisa belonged to you, so by extension he now belongs to me too." The Chairman said, as he lent down to his student. Nagisa weakly fought back making confused noises of refusal, moving his arms in a dis-coordinated way to try and shield his face. Gakushuu blinked as he felt tears run down his cheeks. He hadn't cried in front of his father or anyone in years.

The only person who had ever really tried to help him was being hurt and there was nothing he nor anybody else could do to stop it. He'd never felt more hopeless in his whole life.

* * *

 **Well, that awful chapter is over. Even as I was writing this chapter I was debating what should happen. I was very close to having Karma come in last minute and save Nagisa before anything happened, but I just couldn't fit it in realistically and idk it just seemed to cheapen the story somehow (I can't explain it, then it just made it seem like I was using abuse as an excuse to do a rescue scene which isn't what I'm really going for). But Karma is on his way to the house though.**

 **So the Chairman is acting as if Nagisa will have no memory at all of anything that has happened, and so wont have any emotional distress from it, but it isn't that simple. When stuff like this happens to a person they are effected by it.**

 **Karma is getting progressively more possessive every chapter, and now he's escalated to tracking Nagisa's phone, which while it may come handy in this particular case is a pretty messed up thing to do. I'm struggling with show-casing how bad Karma's possessiveness because there's nobody in the story to really call him out in it; Other characters treat Nagisa worse/ just as bad as he does, and Nagisa himself is so used to possessive and controlling behavior he isn't as freaked out by Karma as he should be. Idk, I just want to make it clear I'm not trying to portray Karma's possessive side as 'cute' because some people do that.**

 **This whole chapter is pretty much the nail in Gakushuu's coffin for any hope he has; The only person who's ever tried to help him is being hurt for trying to help him and he's been told that he will never escape his father. So things are pretty dire.**

 **I realise I've made the Chairman a bit of a two dimensional villain in this story, so I might do some writing from his POV. Not that there's any excuse for what he's done, but nobody is evil for the sake of being evil.**

 **Anyway enough rambling.. Thank you to everyone who reviewed last chapter! I love reading reviews !**

Special thank you too Jennalover who went through and reviewed every chapter she read! Thank you so much, it's so amazing to have someone to comment on your work this much, and you were so lovely about it too! ;_;.. So this chapter is dedicated to her.


	16. Chapter 16

**Thank you for all the reviews, they keep me going!**

* * *

Karma glanced down at his phone then up at the house before him. Assuming that his app was working Nagisa was inside. Karma was freezing after walking here, the cold night air was so sharp against his face it almost stung. Karma sighed, once again reminding himself that he was acting like a possessive psycho- But his feelings of worry were more overwhelming than any reservations he had. He glared at the house; It was big, about the size of his own, the paleness of it contrasted against the night sky making it appear almost ghostly. Karma glanced at the letter box reading the name; _Asano_. Of course.

With a face of bleak determination, Karma stormed over to the front door, his eyes darting up and down checking for security cameras. The Chairman had messaged Nagisa pretending to be Gakushuu to lure him here, Karma was sure of it. Karma wasn't sure exactly _why_ the Chairman would have done this but he could think of a few reasons; The main one being to threaten him into silence about sleeping with Gakushuu to prevent a scandal.

Karma thought of the Chairman- something about the man was _off_ and Karma didn't trust him at all, especially not with Nagisa. He raised his fist to knock on the door but as soon as he lent his hand on the door it swung open _It was unlocked._

Staring down the corridor felt surreal somehow, like looking into another world; although the inside was nothing but ordinary. _I wasn't expecting it to be that easy._ Thinking only about the possibility of Nagisa being in danger, Karma stepped through the open door into the corridor feeling suddenly enveloped by the warm of the house. It was suffocating somehow. _I'm definitely crossing some lines by walking into a house without permission_ Karma thought briefly but then once again his worry for Nagisa overrode everything.

It was deadly quiet and unnaturally still. Karma had a creeping feeling of unease like he might stumble upon something awful. He felt like a character in a horror film. _Don't get scared now. You've got this- Just make sure Nagisa is okay. If the Chairman tries to get you in trouble for breaking into his house then just threaten expose his son for the deviant he is. He can't do anything to you._

Karma also briefly wondered about what excuse he'd give Nagisa for how he knew were he was without looking like a stalker.. He could deal with that later. Karma walked down the corridor listening intently for any sound that would indicate were the occupants of the house were residing. That's when he heard it- the muted sound of movement. It was definitely coming from the room at the end of the hall. Swiftly, without even thinking about it, Karma walked down towards it.

This whole situation reminded him of the time he'd followed Nagisa back to the school building right when they first became friends. Some things never change. Despite his attempts at bravado, Karma felt suddenly nervous and he wasn't sure why exactly (Was he afraid because he'd walked into the house? Because Nagisa might work out what he'd done and think he was a creep? Was he scared of what he might find..?) His heart hammered in his chest and the palms of his hands started to tingle as his mouth went dry.

Steeling himself for whatever was about to come next Karma grabbed the door handle and pushed it open.

* * *

By the time the Chairman unbound Gakushuu, the chair was mostly destroyed. He had been struggling so intensely that both the arms and one of the legs had snapped off leaving splinters of shattered wood spread all over the carpet. But now he actually was was freed however, Gakushuu had lost any will to fight. He felt completely drained and defeated because _what was the point of anything anyway?_

"For someone who was prattling on about 'almost being an adult' you certainly do cry like a baby." His father said to him mockingly. Normally that type of comment would make Gakushuu furious and humiliated but right now he didn't have the energy to care anymore. He just stared at the man before him will dull listless eyes. When Gakushuu didn't reply the man continued. "Shiota mentioned to me that his mother probably wouldn't note his absence tomorrow morning so he'll be spending the night here. If he wakes up properly then we shall tell him he fainted on the way here and we were looking after him. If you want to protect him, you wont tell him the truth."

Gakushuu chanced a glance over at Nagisa; He was slumped on the chair, his face still waxy pale. His eyes were closed shut but the remnants of tear tracks were visible down his cheeks _Look what you've done to him!_ Gakushuu's mind screamed. _You dragged him into this. This is all your fault. All he ever wanted to was help you and look were that got him! Bad things happen to people who care about you._

 _"-_ Are you listening to me?" His father prompted, pulling him out from his thoughts. Gakushuu hadn't even realised that he'd spaced out. "I asked you if you had learnt your lesson?"

"Yes." Gakushuu replied his voice hardly above a whisper. He had learnt his lesson alright, he'd learnt that if he got close to anyone he was putting them in danger, infecting them with his poison. His father smiled and ruffled his hair in a way that could almost be mistaken for affectionate.

"Good." The man said, heading for the door. "I think that this was a very productive teaching session. Now please excuse me while I get cleaned up."

Gakushuu was left alone in the room with the broken chair and the unconscious boy feeling numb. Gakushuu had always told himself that as a rule he didn't care about other people except for how he could benefit of them. It was safer that way, more logical. But if he really didn't care about other people, why did seeing Nagisa hurt make him feel like the world was ending? Why did it make him feel as if guilt would swallow him up? Why did it cause him pain as if he was the one being inured as well? It didn't make sense.

Feeling as if an outside force was moving his body, Gakushuu walked over to where Nagisa was lying. On autopilot he begun to dress the other. Nagisa stirred slightly, but didn't wake from his slumber. He'd been dipping in and out of consciousness for the past.. however long it had been; Even when he was 'awake' his eyes had been far away and un-comprehending. Seeing such an expression on Nagisa's face unnerved Gakushuu it was like the other had lost his soul.

His father had told him that Nagisa wouldn't remember anything about this and Gakushuu prayed it was true, Nagisa had enough issues without this on top of it. Nagisa would wake up as if nothing had happened and he'd go about the rest of his life and Gakushuu would never speak to him any more and never let anyone get too close to him ever again. He'd just spend the rest of his life as his father's puppet for ever and ever. Gakushuu felt like he had an eternity of torture laid out before him and just thinking about that vast amount of time made his nauseous. Gakushuu had always felt as if he would be free from his father once he left school, but now it was clear his father wanted him to serve a life sentence.

When he was finished, Gakushuu lay Nagisa on his side to reduce the risk of him suffocating on his own tongue. _Now what?_ The Chairman mentioned that Nagisa would be spending the night here.. that made Gakushuu uneasy, there was six hours until his father would have to leave to go to work. A lot could be done in six hours. But what could Gakushuu do about it? Every rebellion he'd attempted to make had backfired on himself ten times over. Maybe it was just safer to stand here and do nothing before he made things worse.

Gakushuu heard the door to the lounge open and didn't even bother to turn around, assuming it was his father. Quietly, he braced himself for whatever the man had planned next.

"What the hell is this?" A familiar yet unexpected voice said. Gakushuu whipped around quickly- standing at the door wasn't the Chairman, it was non other than Karma Akabane himself.

* * *

Karma walked into the room and was shocked by what he saw; There were splinters of wood all over the carpet with a badly broken chair. Stood in the middle of the room, facing away from Karma was Gakushuu; He could recognize that strawberry blond hair anywhere. Karma's eye was drawn over to the sofa were there was a small figure lying motionless on the sofa. _Nagisa._

Karma went ballistic. "What the hell is this?" He shouted. Gakushuu whipped around quickly his eyes widening in shock as soon as he recognized him. He blinked, his mouth falling open into a confused gape. Karma pushed past him as he rushed over to Nagisa's slumped form quickly gripping his wrist and feeling for a pulse. His pulse felt normal, thank god. Gakushuu, who had been in a stunned silence for a good few seconds now exclaimed.

"Akabane what the hell are you doing in my house?"

"The door was left wide open so I thought there might be a burglary so I came to check it out. Didn't know it was your house." Karma said, quickly listing off the excuse he'd made up in his head, not even bothering to make it sound convincing. There were more important things than trying to justify his crazy actions. He touched Nagisa's face- it was cold. Seeing Nagisa unconsicous like this filled him with a protective sort of rage. "What happened to Nagisa?"

When Gakushuu didn't reply, Karma stood up to his full height and grabbed him by the collar harshly. Gakushuu didn't even try to pull away. "I asked you a question, what happened to Nagisa?"

Now that Karma was looking at him properly Gakushuu looked a mess. His face and neck were marred with bruises and his eyes were distraught and bloodshot. All the fight he'd had just hours earlier in the park had gone and Gakushuu seemed like an empty husk of his usual self. He paused for a long time before answering as if he were deliberating something.

"Nagisa passed out suddenly. We were taking care of him." He said in a quiet monotone voice. Karma wasn't satisfied with that answer at all.

"Why was your crazy dad pretending to be you in the first place? Why was he texting Nagisa to lure him here?" Karma demanded. Gakushuu's eyes widened in shock, Karma grinned. "Yeah I managed to work _that_ one out. I also have a hunch that your dad found out about you and Nagisa's four year fling and _that's_ what this is all about. Am I right?"

Gakushuu continued to stare at him, that shocked expression on his face. He looked as if he didn't even have the capacity to deny any of it, or to argue back against Karma. All he could do was stand in silence. It unnerved Karma to see someone usually so strong look so ..defeated. Everything about this situation from Gakushuu's demeanour to Nagisa's unconscious state to the chair broken across the floor reeked of something shady. Well, whatever. Karma could decipher exactly what had happened later on; Right now, keeping Nagisa safe was his top priority.

Karma let go of Gakushuu and pushed past him, heading towards Nagisa. In one swift move he scooped the other up in his arms. He knew that his house wasn't exactly near here, and taking Nagisa out into the cold in his current state may not be wise, but he _had_ to get Nagisa out of here, he could feel it as irrational as that sounded. Surprisingly, Gakushuu just stood there like a statue making no move to reprimand or stop him.

Karma walked briskly to the living room door, still wide open from when he had first burst in. Before he could take another step, however, a figure appeared at the bottom of the staircase. It was a tall man with dark trousers and a white shirt. Karma felt a flash of terror and despite himself froze into place.

"Akabane. What are you doing here?" The Chairman asked with a deadly smile.

* * *

 **This chapter was BITCH to write. Wasn't sure how to get Karma into the house without it being awkward. In the end I bit the bullet and just went for it. I planned to write a lot further into the story in this chapter, but the parts that I did write took up more words than i expected.**

 **ANYWAY Karma can tell something dodgy is going on, but he doesn't think it's anything near as bad as what actually happened. He is thinking more along the lines of 'The chairman scaring Nagisa isn't silence'. He was acting pretty rash in this chapter, anyway.**

 **Gakushuu is pretty traumatised as expected which is why he might seem a bit OOC when Karma came bursting into the room (I think normally he'd probably threaten to call the police, but in this chapter he was already emotionally overwhelmed so was sort of like 'well this might as well happen').**

 **Review for more! Let me know what you think**

 **replying to guests;**

 **Miss Ena: Thank you for reviewing, I feel like you understand my direction with this story really well! :)**

 **Jennalover: Thank you again for leaving such long reviews :D And you're so kind! I'm glad you thought I wrote the scene last chapter well (Because I was worried about that)**

 **Nika: I think most people who read this want to chairman dead too.. thanks for** **reviewing** **!**

 **Joy: I don't think the Chairman would go so far as to get Gakushuu lobotomized (I'm not sure that's even done in Japan), but because of his contacts in the medical field he claims he could get Gakushuu put in a mental facility if he wanted to. Apparently in Japan someone can be involuntarily commited to a psychiatric hospital by a legally responsible person. Thank you for the review!**


	17. Chapter 17

"Akabane, what are you doing here?"

Everything seemed to freeze at that question. Karma and the Chairman stood facing each other their eyes locked, neither moving. Karma had thought if he saw the Chairman he'd be able to storm over to him, gun's blazing full of threats, after all, Karma had never been scared of authority before. But for reasons he couldn't explain he felt the creeping sensation of terror run up his spine and he felt completely unable to move. He was aware that he'd been asked a question, but he suddenly wasn't sure how to answer (should he lie? tell the truth?). Even though the Chairman was something about the look in that man's violet eyes that screamed _Dangerous._ Nagisa's weight in his arms suddenly felt heavy.

"Asano. What is Akabane doing in my house?" The Chairman asked when Karma didn't respond. Asano flinched when he was spoken to- he still hadn't moved from his spot in the living room. He looked as if he wanted nothing less than to be brought into this conversation. A heavy silence followed before Asano finally found his voice.

"..I don't know." Asano said quietly, hoping the other two would just ignore him. Karma swallowed _Stop acting so scared! Just lie before he works out you sneaked in here!_

"The door was wide open. I thought this house could be burgled so I went in to tell the owners. I didn't realise this house belonged to our esteemed Chairman." Karma forced himself to say, feeding the Chairman the same lie he had fed Gakushuu. It still wasn't very convincing; He didn't care if Gakushuu knew he was lying, Gakuho, however, was a different story. "Nagisa is my friend so I offered to take him home."

Yet another silence followed Karma's excuse. The Chairman stared at him intently with those piercing violet eyes and Karma felt as if the man could see right through all the lies and the bravado. His heart began to hammer in his chest, he had so many things he had wanted to confront this man about; _Why had Nagisa suddenly fainted? Why was he texting Nagisa pretending to be Gakushuu? What had happened to the chair?._ Right now, however, he wanted nothing more than to escape. But his feet didn't seem to be working. The tensions was almost palpable.

Before the Chairman could reply, however, Nagisa stirred in Karma's arms and his eyes fluttered open looking bleary and confused.

"K- Karma?" He gasped out. Suddenly, everyone's attention was on Nagisa.

"Nagisa are you okay?" Karma asked, solidifying his hold on the other so he wouldn't drop him. Nagisa blinked, his eyes growing adjusted, taking in the surroundings. The light was bright and exacerbated his already pounding headache.

"Karma.. What happened? Where am I?" Nagisa murmured, looking alarmed. Before Karma could answer, the Chairman walked over and Nagisa noticed him for the first time since waking up. The teen looked suddenly petrified.

"Mr Shiota. You fainted almost as soon as you entered our house. You must still be unwell. As the only responsible adult and your Chairman it is my duty to take care of you." He said curtly in a crisp voice. "That applies to you too, Mr Akabane. It is far past your curfew so I am obligated to have you spend the night here."

"What?" Nagisa said, clearly still very confused.

Karma silently gulped. That sounded more like a demand than something done out of kindness; He felt as if he were being trapped here. From the corner of his eye he could see Gakushuu looked completely taken aback. Clearly he hadn't expected the Chairman to insist on Karma stopping the night either. _What is this man's game? He's not gonna reprimand me for lying and breaking into his house? Why do I feel like his prisoner somehow_

"Asano! I've taught you to be a better host than this. Go make these boys a drink." The Chairman said suddenly. Gakushuu flinched yet again then scurried away, looking glad to be given permission to usually bold Asano acting scared wasn't helping Karma's nerves either. The Chairman turned back to Karma and Nagisa, both of whom were in a confused silence. "You can put Mr Shiota down. I'm sure your arms are heavy."

"Thank you for your _kind_ offer.. But I think I'd rather just go home and I'll take Nagisa with me." Karma said, attempting to sound strong. The Chairman scoffed in response.

"Akabane, I cannot in good conscious allow one of my students to break curfew and go out this time of night. It's _dangerous_. I'd be forced to call the police." The Chairman said, still smiling. Karma grit his teeth.

"Is that a threat?" Karma replied. _Was he really being blackmailed into staying here? What is the Chairman after?_

"Of course not. I'm just looking out for the welfare of my students." Gakuho said, sounding downright smug. The look in his eye was just _daring_ Karma to try and oppose him. Slowly, filled with confidence the Chairman walked over to the front door and pulled a key from his pocket. He put the key into the door and with very deliberate movements, locked it. "I think security is very important."

Karma and Nagisa glanced at each other. Nagisa still looked bewildered and as if he were afraid to say anything. Karma wanted to break the door down and escape but he knew there was no way he could do that while holding Nagisa. Besides, the Chairman had the police on his side and knowing him that was more than just an empty threat.

"I know you tricked Nagisa into coming here by pretending to be Asano." Karma said, attempting to sound confident. It was a power-play. The closest thing he had to threaten the Chairman back. Gakuho's eyes widened for a fraction of a second, then his former impassive expression returned. Nagisa looked as if he suddenly remembered something.

"Whatever are you talking about, Mr Akabane? Those wild accusations will get you nowhere. There is no truth to what you're saying, and no evidence of it either.." The Chairman replied simply. Of course he was just denying the accusation- but Karma hoped he'd managed to shake the man just a little bit by proving the Chairman didn't have _everyone_ fooled. "Now, we'll be doing this my way. You can chose to take the easy route or the.. more difficult route. Your choice."

"Well. It looks like we'll be spending the night here." Karma said through gritted teeth. He wasn't risking getting arrested.

"I shall show you to your rooms." The Chairman said, like a lord addressing his subjects.

* * *

Gakushuu poured tea from the kettle into the cup. He was glad to have a simple menial task to focus his attention on. He didn't want to _think_ about anything right now, he just wanted to turn his mind off, forget everything he had just experienced and stop the ball of anxiety that was eating him away inside. But of course, things are never that simple. He wanted to hide out in the kitchen forever away from his father and from his problems, but he knew that wasn't possible. Balancing the two drinks on a tray and picking it up, he headed out.

 _What is Akabane doing here anyway? Did he really break into the house? How does he know so much about the situation? How did he work it out?_ Gakushuu couldn't help but wonder. Akabane had shown up out of nowhere and Gakushuu had been too overwhelmed to do anything but passively accept it; He didn't feel like his usual self at all. Slowly, Gakushuu ascended the stairs careful not to spill any tea. For some reason, keeping his hands steady was requiring more concentration than usual, if he stopped paying attention then they'd start to tremor. He could hear the sound of Karma and his father talking in his bedroom.

Normally, the thought of other people in his bedroom would make Gakushuu deeply uncomfortable because it was the closest thing he had to a sanctuary in this house. Right now, however, he couldn't even muster up the energy to care. Before he could make it to the door, it swung open and his father walked out briskly. As soon as he set eyes on Gakushuu he headed over to him, an almost murderous look in his eyes. Gakushuu came dangerously close to dropping the tray.

"I don't know what that Akabane boy is doing here but he's clearly connected with Shiota. He knows too much. I'm having him stay here until we can work out if he could be a threat or not. It's the most secure option." The Chairman hissed. his son frowned; _'We_ ' implied that Gakushuu was on the same side as his father. "He's refusing to leave Shiota alone so you stay the night with them to make sure he doesn't tell Akabane anything.. incriminating.."

"I thought you said Nagisa wouldn't remember anything?" Gakushuu whispered back, feeling his blood boil; His father had just put him through one of the worst experiences of his life and now he was acting as if nothing had happened? _Why is he giving me orders like I owe him anything?_

"Just a precaution. This is all just for precaution." The Chairman assured him. "Just keep an eye on that Akabane boy. Try to convince him that nothing untoward has happened. That shouldn't be too hard for you, right, Asano?"

"I don't think that's a good idea." Gakushuu replied. He was exhausted. He didn't want to have to keep up the perfect student act and deal with people all night. He wasn't sure he _could._ "Coercing Akabane into staying here will just make him more suspicious- Can't we just send them home- "

"Are you attempting to defy me?" His father said, cutting him off suddenly. He had a twisted smile on his face. The look in his eyes was a sickening mixture of amusement and pity. It made Gakushuu feel pathetic. "Do I really need to spend some more time _convincing_ you to do as I say?"

"I'll do what I can." Gakushuu answered, if only to get the Chairman away from him. He wanted to shout and scream at him- but he knew any resistance would be in vain. _So it seems as if his father didn't know that Karma knew that he knew about Asano and Nagisa. When did this whole thing get so damn complicated? How have things progressed to his father keeping two of his classmates captive under the guise of 'safety'._ Asano hated this stupid plan. He didn't _want_ to have to spend the night with Karma who would no doubt be full of questions Gakushuu didn't want to answer. And Nagisa.. that was even worse. Just _thinking_ about Nagisa made him feel guilty.

"Well. Go on then. I don't want those two to be left alone for too long." The Chairman commanded. "Report back to me in the morning."

Gakushuu nodded silently. He wanted to point out how ridiculous and excessive his father was being, he wanted to call him an idiot and a monster- All the names under the sun. But he was scared and he hated himself for it. Under the Chairman's watchful eyes, Gakushuu walked over to his bedroom door and opened it apprehensively.

* * *

"What _do_ you remember?" Karma asked as soon as the Chairman left the room. Nagisa frowned; His head hurt and just thinking was painful- It evoked a strange sense of nausea. Making sense of things was harder than usual- He kept forgetting where he was.. _It was the Asano house, right? And why was Karma here again?_

"I remember... going to see Gakushuu, but his father was the one who answered the door. I think we spoke a little.. but I can't remember about what. Everything is fuzzy after that." Nagisa said. Karma had placed him in a bed (It was Gakushuu's.. right?) even though it was very soft (and likely very expensive) the searing pain in Nagisa's head and stomach made it impossible for him to be comfortable. Karma was sat on the edge of the bed looking at him intently.

"What were you thinking? going out that late at night when you're sick? To see an _ex_. If you can even call him that. Especially when you _know_ he's dangerous." Karma started to rant. Nagisa knew he probably deserved it, but he couldn't help but feel a twinge of fear as Karma chastised him, he felt tears spring to his eyes involuntarily. For some reason, his emotions felt more fragile than usual. Nagisa felt as if he could break at any moment.

"I'm sorry Karma- I don't know- I just thought Gakushuu was in trouble and I could help." Nagisa started to say. Karma sighed, his expression softening when he saw Nagisa's tears. He squeezed his hand.

" _This_ is why I didn't want you to leave my place, Nagisa. You can't look after yourself. You get yourself into trouble when I'm not there to look after you." Karma said in a low voice. Nagisa let out a sob and curled into Karma's touch. He didn't understand; All that had happened was that he'd gone to the Asano house and fainted because he was ill. That wasn't _too_ bad. _So why I feel like something awful has happened? Why do I feel so scared?_ Nagisa wondered.

"Karma.. how did you know I was here?" Nagisa asked, it suddenly occurring to him how strange it was that Karma knew his location. Nagisa hadn't told him he was coming, _right?_ Karma looked away, opening his mouth silently. Before he came up with an explanation however, the bedroom door opened and Gakushuu came in holding a tray with two tea cups balanced on it. Nagisa tried to catch his eye, but Gakushuu seemed to be pointedly avoiding looking at him.

"You should drink this. You don't want to get dehydrated if you're already unwell." Gakushuu said, his voice dull. Even when he was adressing Nagisa, he still refused to look at him directly. He placed the tray on the bedside cabinet then backed quickly away from Nagisa as if he were venomous. Seeing Gakushuu reminded Nagisa of something he couldn't quite recall. He hated all this uncertainty.

"Your dad is a fucking psycho." Karma stated, glaring at Gakushuu, who looked as if he'd rather be anywhere but here. "Why did your father lure Nagisa here?"

"I don't know."

"That's bullshit." Karma rebutted. "Why did he take your phone off you in the first place then? Is it because he knows about you and Nagisa? Was he that pissed off about having a gay son?"

"I'm not gay!" Gakushuu snapped, clearly frustrated by Karma's questioning. Karma scoffed in disbelief. "Just shut up and go to sleep, Akabane."

"Oh. Wow. Such an eloquent host." Karma said sounding bitter. The tension between the two of them was almost palpable, it made Nagisa feel almost sick with anxiety he felt like a helpless bystander next to a storm. He hated this. He felt like there were so many gaps in his memories- It was like there was something important stuck on the peripheral of his conscious, just out of his grasp. But for some reason, he was afraid to remember exactly what it was.

"It's late." Was Gakushuu's curt reply. He was already climbing into one of the futons the Chairman had set out in preparation for the extra guests. It almost seemed to Nagisa that Gakushuu was trying to escape the confrontation. But that wasn't like him at all.

"Gakushuu." Nagisa said quietly, addressing for the first time. The other boy flinched ever so slightly, looked at Nagisa, then quickly looked away. "Can you just tell me what happened please? Were those messages asking for help really not from you?"

Gakushuu fixed his eyes at the space behind Nagisa's head. You could almost see the cogs of his brain whirring as he worked out how to answer. "No. They weren't from me. I don't need your help with anything."

"So that means they really were from your father?" Nagisa prompted. This was like trying to get blood out of a stone. Gakushuu clearly didn't want to admit to anything being amiss even though it was obvious to anyone there was something strange going on. "Why would he do that?"

Another pause followed. Both Karma and Nagisa had their eyes fixed on the other teen waiting for his answer. It was impossible to excuse this away.

"Akabane's right. He found out about us two. He probably wanted to speak to you about it- maybe to find out more information. I don't know. He said you fainted almost as soon as you got to the house." Gakushuu said, sounding almost robotic. He had a revolted expression on his face, as if just saying those words left a disgusting taste in his mouth. That explanation was logical and it made sense. Sure, it was a little strange for the Chairman to lie to get to speak to Nagisa, but other than that it was fairly simple. So why didn't Nagisa feel satisfied? Why did he feel as if there was still a gaping hole in the story.

"See. That wasn't so hard- " Karma said, with a condescending smile. "Why were you acting so cagey instead of just giving us that simple explanation. Where you embarrassed?"

"It's late. Drink your tea and go to bed." Gakushuu replied pointedly, turning away from the other two into the covers. But Nagisa could tell by how his shoulders were tensed he wasn't relaxed at all. Karma slowly sat on the futon closest to the bed. He met Nagisa's eye with a reassuring look and gently reached over to squeeze his hand. Nagisa squeezed it back; Karma looked more relaxed. Gakushuu's explanation had apparently satisfied him that Nagisa hadn't been hurt. For some reason, Nagisa felt guilty shattering Karma's sense of relief by pointing out that he _still doesn't feel right._ So Nagisa didn't say anything at all.

Nagisa glanced around the room; The last time he'd been on this bed had been during the summer; After a particularly rough session, the two of them had laid here in each other's arms enjoying the afterglow. It was one of those rare moments that only ever happened after sex, were Gakushuu had been relatively placid and let his guard down a little and they'd just _talked. It had been blissful._

Nagisa sipped at his tea, feeling somehow guilty for thinking about the in front of Karma. The red head in question was looking at him carefully.

"I can't believe that Chairman asshole made you come here so late when he knew you were ill." He said, shaking his head. "But I think psycho junior might be right. Some sleep would probably be good for you. Tomorrow I'll look after you at my place."

"That sounds nice." Nagisa said quietly. He was telling the truth. For some reason he didn't like the thought of being alone at home tomorrow. He nestled under the covers hoping some sleep would take away these awful feelings.

The room was filled with silence as they all laid on their respective mattresses. All three of them were exhausted, but nobody slept that night.

* * *

 **I kind of wrote myself into a corner with this chapter and the last one. It still feels so awkward, and I'm having a hard time writing how the characters would act in this absurd situation So I think I should clarify their feelings;**

 **The Chairman; Is super suspicious of Karma and a tiny bit threatened because he didn't know that anyone else had any idea about any of this. Hence why he's making him stay over to asses how much of a threat he really is. He has also underestimated how traumatized Gakushuu is in this chapter, so assumes he'll be able to be he usual charismatic self and deal with Karma and Nagisa.**

 **Gakushuu: Is pretty traumatized and doesn't really have the emotional strength to deal with the stressful situation at hand, hence why he's just being super cagey and defensive. He thinks hiding the truth and cutting ties with Nagisa is the best thing for him.**

 **Nagisa: Is traumatized also, but because his memory is fuzzy he can't put his feelings into context. He's still confused and slowed down from the roofie, so he's finding it hard to process things, but he knows shit aint right.**

 **Karma: Protecting Nagisa is his number 1 priority. He can tell something dodgy is going on, but he is reasonably satisfied with Gakushuu's explanation, so he's just attributing most of Nagisa's behavior to him being ill.**

 **Anyway, Thank you for all the reviews! Please review and tell me what you think of this chapter!**

 **Replies;**

Jennalover: **I love these long reviews! Unfortunately Karma didn't find out the truth in this chapter :(.. The Chairman hasn't done anything too drastic to Karma yet, but he's still not off the radar. And I agree.. The three protags of this story do deserve better! You're right, the Chairman has made it super hard for Gakushuu to escape him, which sucks. I'm glad my writing had such a powerful effect on you (I think! I hope you're okay!) Thank you for being so nice about this chapter! I really look forward to your reviews. Also merry Xmas to you!**

 **Nika: I'm glad your invested ty for commenting**

 **Miss Ena : Asano's kind of an Ass in this but he does have it pretty rough, so I'm not surprised you feel bad for him. But yeah, Nagisa is pretty traumatized even if he can't remember what happened. thanks for reviewing! **


	18. Chapter 18

Karma stared at the ceiling, watching the light slowly filter in through the cracks in the curtain as the sun rose. He could hear the breathing of the other two occupants of the room coming from either side of him- He couldn't believe he was currently having a _sleepover_ with Nagisa and _Nagisa's ex_. Karma glanced over at the _ex_ in question; Gakushuu was in the same position he'd been in all night, turned away from the others facing the wall, with shoulders far too tense to be sleeping. If they guy wasn't such an asshole, Karma would feel sorry for him because as much as he tried to hide it, he was clearly terrified of his own father with good reason, apparently. Well, his father was a mad man, since he apparently had no qualms about tricking another student into coming to his house.. Karma looked over at Nagisa; He was completely burrowed under the covers, probably asleep.

Karma let out an uneasy sigh; They'd have to talk about things when Nagisa woke up.. He'd probably want to know how Karma had tracked him down to the Asano house and there'd be no avoiding the question this time. _But after what happened last night, he must see why I have to be there to protect him, he must realise that he can't look after himself, he must see that I had no choice but to do what I did.. I'm just being protective._

Karma's train of thought was interrupted when he heard the sound of footsteps across the bedroom, then the door gently opening, he looked around to see Asano leaving the room. After a moment's hesitation, he followed him _There were things he needed to talk about.. Without Nagisa in the room._ Quietly, Karma crept across the landing until he reached the door Gakushuu had disappeared behind- he could faintly hear the sound of running water. The door was locked, but it wasn't anything that couldn't be solved by twisting it around with a penny. Taking in a gulp of air, Karma pulled the handle down and walked in.

Gakushuu was stood in the middle of the bathroom floor, clearly in the middle of getting undressed to get into the shower- As soon as he heard Karma walk in he whipped around quickly, eyes wide with shock, mouth open.

"A-Akabane what the hell?" He exclaimed, taking a second to attempt to compose himself, quickly putting his shirt back on, but not quick enough to prevent Karma from seeing the faded bruises and grazed skin. "Do locks just mean nothing to you? What is wrong with you?"

He was predictably pissed, but also flustered, which gave Karma the upper-hand. "I just thought we could have a nice little chat. Man to man." He said, propping himself up on the sink, ignoring Gakushuu's complaint of _you aren't supposed to sit there!._ "And after this, we never have to speak to each other again."

Gakushuu looked at him with annoyed violet eyes.. but they also looked tired.. too tired to bother to arguing properly with Karma. "Make it quick then. The sooner I no longer have to associate with you the better." He replied, but although his words sounded harsh, Gakushuu's tone lacked it's usual venom.

"Your Dad isn't happy about you and Nagisa, is he." Karma said, narrowing his eyes. It was a statement, not a question. He was getting straight to the point."Is he going to take that out on Nagisa? Is Nagisa safe from him?"

Gakushuu didn't answer immediately, he just stared back at him, as if he didn't know the answer. "I think so long as Nagisa doesn't interact with me in anyway, father will have no reason to bother him." He said. It was the first time Karma had the sense that Gakushuu wasn't being defensive. Just honest. "And I have no desire to interact with Nagisa any further so that _wont_ be a problem."

"You and Nagisa have been over for weeks now, but he has a hard time leaving you alone because he thinks that 'you're in trouble' and 'you need his help'." Karma said, he glanced at the bruises on Gakushuu's neck. Karma hadn't caused those during the fight, but he didn't have any question in his mind who was behind them. _Gakushuu is being abused by his father._ That revelation didn't come to a shock to Karma, it was like acknowledging something he knew all along. "And maybe he's partially right, but it's not up to Nagisa to save you- "

"I never asked him to- "

"Whatever. You just need to leave Nagisa alone completely. Block his number- ignore him school- don't even acknowledge him. Because getting involved with you is bad for him." Karma hissed, a dangerous look in his amber eyes.

"Oh, and because you're _so_ much better than me. _So_ much safer to be around. You're such a stable person." Gakushuu said, sarcastically, crossing his arms. He glanced to the side. "I don't need Nagisa's help or his company. I could block him and ignore him if that will make you feel less _threatened._ You possessive psycopath."

"Good." Karma said- this was going rather smoothly. He actually trusted that Gakushuu wouldn't try to pursue Nagisa further, even if the guy did still have feelings for Nagisa, he was too proud to do that. "And if you do need help, then get it from somewhere else- go to a damn teacher or something, or one of your 'followers', or just go straight to the social services."

As much as Karma disliked Gakushuu, he didn't like the idea of him being knocked around by his father, either.

"How many times do I have to say it? I'm not in trouble- I don't need help." Gakushuu growled defensively. Karma looked him up and down. For some reason it pissed Karma off that he wouldn't accept any form of 'weakness' no matter how blatantly obvious it was to everyone.

"Oh of course. You got all those bruises from walking into doors. I'm sure." Karma bit back at him. Gakushuu glared.

" _You_ gave me these bruises, idiot- or can you not even remember fighting in the park last night?" Gakushuu hissed back, crossing his arms even tighter. Karma hopped off the sink. It was no wonder Nagisa got so worried over this idiot who couldn't even admit when he was in obvious trouble.

"I might of given you that black eye- You're welcome, by the way." Karma said, walking closer towards the other, Gakushuu backed away on instinct. "But don't try to tell me that I'm the one who choked you until your neck was black and blue." Quickly, Karma grabbed the other's wrist and pulled his arm up, before forcing back the sleeve revealing bands of raw-red skin that looked like rope-burn. "And I didn't do this, either- "

"Get off me!" Gakushuu shouted, snatching his arm away from Karma and holding it to his chest. He was breathing heavily, his violet eyes wide and full of emotion. Karma backed off, putting his hands up in the air.

"Does he hurt you all the time or did he just snap after finding out about you and Nagisa?" Karma asked, keeping his voice low. It wasn't soothing, but it wasn't attacking either. "What did he do to you, exactly?"

At those words, Gakushuu's clenched his fist. He glared at Karma for what felt like the longest time, it almost seemed like he was internally debating something, when he opened his mouth, Karma for a split second thought that Gakushuu was going to answer his question and admit to what was going on.

"I'll block Nagisa's number, I wont speak to him anymore, I wont involve him in my life. That's what you wanted, wasn't it?" Gakushuu said, his voice sounding hollow. He pushed past Karma, picking up a towel on the way out. "I'm going to use the other bathroom. Don't break in this time."

Karma was left standing there. _He'd got Gakushuu to agree to the terms he wanted, right? So why did he still feel like something was left undone?_

* * *

When Nagisa opened his eyes and saw both Gakushuu and Karma had gone he felt an inexplicable sense of panic. _I don't want to be alone._ He felt his breath catch in his throat and his heart quicken. He sat up in the bed, feeling a sudden rush of nausea and his stomach flip and his eyes blur, he quickly clasped his hands over his mouth out of fear he might vomit. He _knew_ there was nothing to be afraid of and he was being irrational, but that didn't stop the frantic sense of fear taking over. He got to his feet, feeling as though he could collapse under the weight of his own body at any moment as his legs were currently shaky and unreliable, and he still had that awful ache in the pit of his stomach. Non the less, he walked across the room to the door, trying to ignore how distorted and twisted everything looked, how he had the strangest sensation as if the room were spinning beneath him and he could be sent flying at any moment _It's all in you head. It's all in your head._ Nagisa didn't have a clear plan in mind, but he just knew that he _couldn't_ be alone in this room. He couldn't explain why.. even to himself.

Nagisa pulled the handle down, the metal felt slippery under his sweaty palm but he managed to open the door. Suddenly, standing in front of him was the Chairman himself wearing a pristine suit despite how early in the morning it was. Nagisa gasped and stumbled backwards in shock, almost falling backwards on the floor. His feelings of panic instantly escalated into pure terror.

"I'm sorry, did I startle you?" The Chairman said, with a condescending smile. "I was just making sure you boys were all awake."

Nagisa nodded dumbly; He had always found the Chairman intimidating, but right now it felt worse; It felt as though he was confronting a monster.

"Excellent. I'll drive you and Akabane home, you're clearly too ill to attend school and he is still suspended after all. Be ready in half an hour." The Chairman said, smile still in place. He didn't even wait for Nagisa's reply before turning on his heel and walking away. Nagisa finally felt his legs give out from under him, and his quickly sunk to his knees his whole body trembling. He had never felt intense irrational directionless fear like this before.

"Nagisa, what's wrong?"

Nagisa looked up to see a concerned-looking Karma stood in the doorway, He felt a rush of relief and without even thinking, stood up and flung his arms around him, pressing himself close to the other. He knew Karma would be startled, but the red head just put a hand around his back.

"Nagisa, what's brought this on?" He asked, a strange mixture of worry and pleasure from Nagisa's sudden contact in his voice. Nagisa felt tears sting his eyes again. What had brought this on? What was wrong with him? How could he possibly explain it to Karma when he couldn't even understand what was wrong with himself?

"It must be because I'm ill." Nagisa said, chocking back tears as he buried his face in Karma's shoulder. He just wanted to stop feeling this way.

* * *

 **Poor Nagisa is still traumatized but he can't understand why..**

 **I think this may be the first interaction between Karma and Gakushuu that hasn't ended in a physical fight. Their relationship was pretty simple at the start (just plain animosity) but it's gradually becoming more complicated.. In this chapter Karma realises that Gakushuu is being abused by his father (But he doesn't know how bad it actually is) and it is putting him in a conflicting situation because while he doesn't like Gakushuu he doesn't want him to be abused. However, Nagisa is his top priority so Karma would rather he was safe than Gakushuu. He also recognises that making even more of an enemy out of the Chairman might be bad for him AND Nagisa.**

 **Please review if I should write more! Let me know what you think could/should happen and what you thought of this chapter.**

Bunny-chan: Wow! Best Karma x Nagisa story you have read is a high honor! That makes me happy. I don't think you're alone in wanting to punch the Chairman in the face.. as for Yandere!Karma, he is becoming increasingly possessive/protective.

Guest: Yeah I kind of intended for Karma's behaviour to be a little off.. and maybe I should write a happier fic about the characters or something haha.

Miss Ena: Thank you for your kind words! I'm glad I managed to convey how condescending Karma was being in the last chapter.


	19. Chapter 19

Finally the Gakuho POV chapter I've been teasing. _Thanks for all the reviews, please review for more~_

* * *

The car was completely silent as Gakuho drove. He didn't mind; Moments were other people felt uncomfortable just made him feel more in control, it was almost amusing watching his three students squirm in their seats looking as if they'd rather be just about anywhere else. Shiota and Akabane were in the back sat close to each other.. maybe too close. He still wasn't entirely sure the substance of their relationship- _friendship? Or something else?_ They certainly were an odd pair.. Shiota was such a meek boy who had never made ripples, Gakuho hardly knew who he was before this debacle. Akabane on the other hand had been at his school for not even two months and he'd already earned a fearsome reputation and a suspension. The only thing the two appeared to have in common was their status as outcasts.

Gakushuu sat in the front seat next to him, looking pointedly out of the window, he wasn't even hiding how much he despised being forced into this situation. Gakuho unconsciously smirked; His son was always like an open book to him. _Or at least, that is what he had thought._ Gakuho's mood darkened suddenly at that thought- Gakushuu had always been his finest creation and treasured possession.. So how could it be that his son had managed to keep secrets from him. Gakuho was _supposed_ to know everything about him, so how was it that Gakushuu kept his relationship with Nagisa hidden for all these years? What else was he hiding?

The whole situation had made Gakuho feel like he was losing control. Control over everything in his life was something Gakuho went to great lengths to maintain.. loosing that even by an inch made him feel as though everything was in jeprody. Gakushuu _couldn't_ be allowed to slip from his grasp- he wouldn't allow it.. Gakushuu was his creation, he was a part of Gakuho. The thought of him sneaking around with that Shiota boy made his blood boil.

"This is my apartment block." Nagisa piped up as they approached a large building. Shiota's block looked bland and non-descript, the design was obviously a standardized one used to maximize the amount of people they could cram in. It practically reeked of poverty- it was fitting that someone like Nagisa Shiota would live here, the Chairman decided. He pulled up his car onto the pavement.

"Take care of yourself now, Shiota, get well soon so you can return to school." Gakuho said. He was so used to faking genuine emotion that those words were effortless. He smiled out of habit without even thinking about it. "And Akabane- I hope after this weeks suspension you will return to school more focused on learning."

"I'll be a star pupil, I'm sure." Akabane said sarcastically, a disarming smile on his face.

"Thank you for taking care of us." Shiota added as he opened the car door. Although it was obvious that he didn't really mean it- It was obvious to the Chairman that Shiota was scared of him. _Good._ The Chairman enjoyed seeing the fear in his eyes and the tension in his body. Gakuho had assured his son that Shiota wouldn't remember anything about the incident last night, but part of him hoped that wasn't completely true. He wanted Shiota to be left with some emotional damage based off what happened. The little brat _deserved_ it.

"Of course. That is my duty as an educator." The Chairman said, still smiling as the boys got out of the car. Shiota was still unstable on his legs as he stepped onto the pavement. Akabane extended a hand, holding Shiota's arms to steady him. _How sweet_ the Chairman thought as he watched the scene unfold.. Everything would of been so less complicated if Akabane hadn't have gotten involved; Even Gakuho was shocked when the boy had suddenly showed up in the house last night, if he had arrived just a few minutes earlier then they could of been in real trouble. Akabane has shown time and again his has no respect for rules nor authority, controlling him was near-impossible. _Yes, Akabane was a loose canon. One to watch out for._

* * *

As soon as the Chairman drove off, Nagisa instantly felt a lot better. He still felt _bad_ but he felt _better_ than he had moments earlier, as if a weight had been lifted off his shoulders and he could suddenly breath again, he had always found the Chairman intimidating but now for some reason he found him _terrifying_. Karma tugged his arm.

"Come on- I'll take you home and make you some proper breakfast." Karma said, his tone reassuring, Nagisa lent into him. He felt as if he was being pathetic and clingy, but he was glad Karma was here with him. For some reason he couldn't stand the thought of being alone right now. Logically, he knew he shouldn't risk letting one of his mother's neighbours see Karma again.. but right now he didn't feel like listening to logic, so the two of them walked up the stairs to the apartment together. They reached the front door and Nagisa pulled open the door allowing them both in. Karma went straight for the kitchen and Nagisa followed.

"Crazy night, huh?" Nagisa said, sitting at the kitchen table and watching Karma work (He felt a little guilty about having the guest cook for him). Karma chuckled darkly.

"A night in the Asano residence; I'm surprised we survived. That Chairman is the definition of psycopath. I can't believe he forced us to stay the night as his captives- I was almost surprised he let us go." Karma said, as he whisked the eggs. "Still. I'm glad I was there as well. I would hate to think of you alone with those two.. I don't know which one I trust the least.."

Nagisa nodded, then paused as he realised something. "Karma.. you still haven't explained how you knew I was there.. Or how you knew were Asano's house was in the first place." He stated, a slight frown on his face as he tried to recall if he actually had told Karma without realising it. Karma stopped whisking suddenly, his expression grave. In an instant, the air was thick with tension.

"Nagisa, you understand that no matter what I do, I always have your best interests at heart. I really mean that- " Karma said, looking up from the bowl too stare into Nagisa's eyes. He blushed slightly and averted his gaze. "I've never felt this way about anybody before.." He said in a quieter more embarrassed voice. Normally, Nagisa enjoyed seeing Karma's shy side on the rare occasions it showed itself.

"Karma.." Nagisa said looking up at him. "What are you trying to say?"

"Nagisa, you shouldn't be mad- because if you could look after yourself then I wouldn't of have to do things like this." Karma stated, crossing his arms defiantly, making excuses before he had even admitted whatever it was he'd done.

"Karma- just tell me!" Nagisa said, standing up out of his chair. He couldn't stand this tension.

"I put a tracking app on your phone and connected it to my phone." Karma burst out, putting the whisk down. Nagisa's eyes widened in horror. Karma quickly hurried over to him and pulled him into a hug. "I know- I know how it looks, okay? I wouldn't normally do something like this, but you just have so many people who've hurt you to you- Your _mother_ , your _ex_. You know what really worries me about that? You _love_ the people who've hurt you. You'll still do almost anything for them."

Karma said the last two lines accusingly and Nagisa couldn't even refute them. He felt so overwhelmed that he didn't even know how to feel.. Karma had been _tracking_ him. But the way Karma phrased it made it almost seem like such measures were necessary. _Was it?_ Was Nagisa really so lost and hopeless that he needed to be constantly tracked and looked after.

"Karma. Do you really think I'm that pathetic? That useless?" Nagisa asked, looking up at Karma. He wasn't saying it to make the other feel guilty. The question was genuine. The thought of Karma going behind his back like that made him angry.. but more than that he was angry at himself.

"Nagisa that isn't why- "

"Yes it is." Nagisa said, cutting Karma off. He looked down at the table, biting his lip. He still felt so lost, so out of control so _afraid-_ The same way he'd felt since he'd woken up in the Asano house. He laughed bitterly. "I'm just an idiot."

* * *

Gakuho had knew from a young age that he wasn't normal. Besides his incredible intelligence and his athletic power he always saw things in a way others didn't; He acknoweldged things others were too afraid to admit. He recognised that the weak were useless and the strong should rule over them. The reason he chose education was because he wanted to indoctrinate young minds into his way of thinking.. children were the best way to create a new, better society after all. (Of course, he had to be careful, if he was too vocal about his beliefs surrounding eugenics he could get himself in trouble) The strong would prevail.

He had an _interesting_ perspective on his relationship with his son. His son shared his DNA so of course he was genetically superior to most of the peons that inhabit the world, his mother had been physically intellectually gifted as well- if only she hadn't chose to end her life so soon after Gakushuu's birth then he would of created many more children with her.. Gakuho had a duty to society to make sure his son reached his potential and if that meant coercing and controlling him then so be it. That was why he had such a low tolerance for Gakushuu when he didn't meet his potential and was so quick to lose his temper with him. Truth be told, nobody could evoke his anger as quickly as Gakushuu could.

Gakuho saw himself as a good father, he looked after Gakushuu and pushed him to reach his potential and gave him the opportunity to be strong enough to have power over others, Gakushuu wouldn't be half the person he was if he had been raised by anybody else- no other parents would have the discipline to push their offspring the way he had. Gakushuu should be eternally grateful for the privileged life he'd had, so it shouldn't be too much to ask that he gave a little in return every now and then.. It wasn't as if Gakuho had a wife any more to satisfy him. Besides, Gakushuu came from Gakuho, he is a part of him- so no matter what he does to him, it isn't wrong. In the bible, God kills thousands of people and still remains good because the creator can do what they want to their creations- Gakuho sees his relationship with his son in the same light.

It was just the two of them left in the car and the tension seemed thicker than ever. Gakuho drove in silence, hardly having to stop since the streets were devoid of traffic at this early time, the roads were almost entirely empty. _Good._

Gakushuu was still staring out of the window pointedly, frozen in the exact same position he had been for the whole journey. Gakuho was mildly impressed at his ability to stay so still for so long; He was like a human statue. He looked as if he wanted to be anywhere but here. _Too bad_. There were still things they needed to talk about.

Gakuho chose to take the scenic route and drive along a particularly deserted road on the way to school. They were mostly obscured from the view of others by an overgrowth of trees and shrubbery. Gakushuu didn't even acknowledge the obvious detour, he still refused to look at his father. Gakuho sighed.

"Asano, how long do you intend to sulk for? You're a little old to be acting like a toddler." Gakuho said simply, drumming his fingers on the steering wheel. He enjoyed making digs at his son, it had always been amusing to see how quickly he'd snap. This time, however, Gakushuu didn't react at all. He stayed perfectly still as if his father hadn't spoken at all.

That pissed Gakuho off. He was trying to be civil here, but Gakushuu was insisting upon being difficult. Without hesitation the Chairman grabbed the teen's face with one hand, forcing their eyes to meet. Gakushuu still didn't react- his Violet eyes were impassive and he didn't bother to put up any resistance, simply allowing himself to be moved around like a rag doll. He looked paler than usual and even the concealer couldn't hide the bruising around his eyes ( _when did that happen? When he was in the chair, perhaps?_ Gakuho wondered).

"If anyone asks, you hurt yourself doing sports." The Chairman said. Although that much was obvious. To be honest, the Chairman didn't particularly care if teachers or students worked out that he was hurting his son, he suspected a lot of them already did know but there wasn't anything they could do about it- most were too afraid to challenge him and it wasn't as if they could prove anything. His secretary had actually walked in on him beating his son last year- she just left quickly and never said a word. Reputation was important to Gakuho, but he didn't care if people liked him, only that they feared him.

Besides. _Gakushuu was his son, so he could do what he liked to him._

"Is that all you wanted to say?" Gakushuu asked in a disgruntled tone, finally breaking his silence. He was being insolent, but the look in his eyes wasn't one of defiance, it was one of defeat.

"No." Gakuho said curtly, letting go of him and focusing his eyes on the road (he knew it well enough not to give it his full attention even if was going over 40) He paused for a moment before speaking. "Is Nagisa Shiota the only other person you've slept with."

That got Gakushuu's attention. His eyes widened a fraction and he looked suddenly panicked. It was subtle, but Gakuho picked up on it.

"Yes. He is." Gakushuu answered, clearly uncomfortable with this line of questioning. "More people would just be more risk.."

"Liar." Gakuho stated. "I've seen your phone, remember? Any recently deleted texts were easy to recover. I know you've seen someone else recently, the question is who?"

Gakushuu balled his fists. "No, you must be mistaken." He muttered. "There wasn't anyone else- "

"You know how I feel about lying, Asano." Gakuho said, cutting him off harshly as he felt himself getting irritated with the boy's pathetic excuse making. "Tell me their name."

"Why do you need to know?" Gakushuu snapped back, eyes blazing. "You've already punished me enough. Do you think I'm ever going to bring anyone else into my life again after that? You've made your point."

"You're being awfully dramatic. You got off lightly last night." Gakuho said simply. Truth be told, his son was a lot more effected by Nagisa being hurt than he had anticipated. He thought that Gakushuu would be pissed off and humiliated at having his property taken like that, but he didn't think the boy would be acting so... broken. Gakushuu must of actually cared about the boy- _how pathetic_ \- Gakuho hated the thought of Gakushuu wasting his feelings and tears on some weak nobody like Nagisa Shiota. "I'm going to find out who it is either way, it will be a lot easier if you just tell me who it is."

Gakushuu stayed silent, holding his head in his hands. He wasn't hiding his despair as he usually would. He wasn't even bothering to pretend to be strong. Gakuho felt another stroke of annoyance. _All this over Nagisa Shiota?_

"What are you going to do to them?" Gakushuu asked, not looking at his father as he spoke, something which Gakuho hated.

"I think you know the answer to that." The Chairman replied briskly. Gakushuu closed his eyes as if he couldn't even bare the thought of it. He stayed like that for a few long seconds, his eyes scrunched shut. Gakuho was about to grab his face again, and reprimand him for acting so weak and vulnerable, but the boy sat up suddenly. There was a strange change in his demeanor as if he'd had some sort of epiphany. He was no longer avoiding looking at his father, but there was a mysterious energy behind his eyes.

"Why are you like this?" Gakushuu questioned, with genuine curiosity. "Why did you have me if all you want to do is make me suffer?"

"You aren't sparing me the histrionics today, are you." The Chairman said. He glared at Gakushuu. He didn't like the strange mood that had overtaken the boy, he somehow didn't seem himself at all. "All I'm doing is making sure you take the right path. That's my duty to you and to society. Any suffering you experience is incidental."

Gakushuu didn't stop staring at him. "You're being serious." He said, sounding a little hysterical. "You know, some psychologists define evil as knowing better and doing worse. By that definition you aren't actually evil at all, just a grossly dysfunctional human."

"Dysfunctional?" The Chairman questioned, raising an eyebrow. He was about to list off his many achievements to prove just how above-average his functioning was, but Gakushuu continued.

"But I'm not any better, am I? I'm filled with the same poison you are." Gakushuu said, lifting up his rope-burned arms and pulling back the sleeves of his shirt. He stared at his veins as if he could actually physically see the poison under his skin. Gakuho didn't react, but deep down he was starting to feel a little unsettled. "Us two are like black holes. All we can do is suck the light and happiness out of anything we encounter."

"If you're trying to distract me from finding out who the second person is then- "

"You're always going on about the duty we have to improve society, aren't you?" Gakushuu cut him off. His misery from earlier was undetectable, he was grinning almost manically now. "So why don't we improve society right now by killing ourselves?"

Before Gakuho had a chance to fully register those words, Gakushuu unbuckled his own seat belt then lent over and grabbed the steering wheel, pulling harshly. Next thing the Chairman knew, the Car was suddenly off the road, hurtling towards a wall. Gakushuu was still gripping the steering wheel, still smiling. It was lucky that the Chairman had lightening-quick reflexes. In an instant, he slammed down on the breaks and wrenched the wheel from his son's hand. With his other hand he grabbed A fistful of Gakushuu's blazer to stop him from flying out the front window without his seat belt as the car came to a screeching halt mere centimetres away from the wall.

Gakuho did not release his grip on Gakushuu nor the wheel as he sat there, in genuine shock, breathing heavily, his knuckles white. Gakushuu was doubled over, his shoulders shaking making small noises. Gakuho honestly couldn't tell if the boy was crying or laughing.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Gakuho demanded, still in shock. He let go of the wheel and grabbed Gakushuu with both hands, practically dragging him half over to his side of the car.

Gakushuu just laughed- _yes he was definitely laughing_ albeit hysterically and without humor. It occurred to Gakuho that he couldn't even remember the last time he'd heard Gakushuu laugh.

"What is wrong with you?" The Chairman repeated, for once not knowing the right words to regain control over the situation.

"What's wrong with me is that I'm your son." Gakushuu shouted, manically. His eyes were wide with reckless abandon. Gakuho gritted his teeth, for once completely at loss of what to do in this situation. He shook Gakushuu hard.

"Stop it with this 'crazy' act. Your attempts to.. _unsettle_ me are futile." The Chairman demanded, a hint of desperation in his voice. Because truthfully, he sensed this- whatever _this_ was -wasn't an act.

"I worked all my life to be a powerful person, intelligent, well-respected, a good student- because I thought things could get better. But now I know they never will. None of it matters! Because no matter how good I am, I'll never graduate from being father's puppet. Isn't that right?" Gakushuu hissed, he sounded as if he was talking more to himself than anyone else. "Its a joke. My life is a sick joke!"

"Almost crashing the car is a sick joke. Is this your attempt to get revenge on me? You almost killed us both. You truly are a reckless idiot risking your own life to try and scare me." The Chairman said, struggling to keep his voice even, he was trying to reframe the situation to fit his narrative to regain control. Surely Gakushuu hadn't actually meant to hurt anyone let alone kill them. _Why would he want to do that?_ It's preposterous. "You'll be paying for any damage to the car- don't think you'll get off lightly for this- if I didn't pride both of our perfect attendances so much I would spend the next few hours making you _suffer_ , but make no mistake, Asano; you have not escaped your punishment, it is merely delayed until after school. You are exceedingly lucky the car still works."

Gakushuu didn't even seem to be properly listening to him, that vacant look still in his eyes even as Gakuho held him in a bruising grip. Normally any mention of punishment would have Gakushuu trying to talk himself out of it, or heading for the nearest exit, but he seemed beyond that now, somehow. He was silent for a while before speaking.

"Do you still trust me enough to sit in the front seat next you for the remainder of the journey?" Gakushuu asked slyly, not an ounce of the usual fear in his voice or any recognizable emotion behind his cold Violet eyes. Wordlessly, Gakuho opened the door and stepped out, within a few brisk steps he walked around his car and pulled open the door of the other side.

With far more force than necessary, Gakuho grabbed his son by the back of his collar and pulled him out of the car, dragging him around to the back seats and quickly shoving him in. Gakushuu just looked up at him with those empty Violet eyes, body full of bruises, that unnerving smile on his face.

Gakuho stared at him.. this has never happened before- _he had no idea what his son was thinking_ , Gakuho felt as if the control he had held over his son was slipping away from his grasp. Gakushuu had always been a child who was easy for Gakuho to understand, but now, Gakuho felt as if he was looking at a stranger. _This is that Nagisa Shiota's fault, I'm sure of it._

For the first time in his life, Gakuho felt a tiny sliver of fear towards his son. He had no idea what the boy was capable of. The thought that Gakushuu had actually intended to kill them both frightened him. _No_ \- he squashed the fear down. Gakushuu was just bluffing.. this was just a particularly dangerous temper tantrum, really. _Why would Gakushuu want to die? Why would Gakushuu want his father to die?_ Gakuho was sure that despite his son's rebellious attitude he would never actually want to kill him, _right?_ Gakushuu loved him.

"Don't think that his whole little farce has made me forget about finding the second person, Asano." The Chairman said curtly, before slamming the door shut. "Because I will find them."

Asano sat up, glaring at the car floor, looking suddenly subdued his mania from earlier dissipating. He sounded utterly hopeless. "That doesn't matter. Non of it matters."

* * *

 **Hope this chapter was okay and wasn't too garbled.**

 ** _Thanks for all the reviews, please review for more~_**

 **So I wrote that Gakuho POV chapter that a few people have asked about. I picked an interesting chapter to write from his POV, because until now he was sort of a 'puppet master' character, but now he's starting to really loose his ability to control Gakushuu since he's acting more 'illogical'.**

 **Gakushuu is.. going through some stuff. He's had a few impulsively violent moments directed towards himself and others throughout the story (Punching Nagisa, punching the mirror, recklessly fighting with Karma) but trying to crash the car was the most extreme. He was able to deal with the shit in his life because of his belief and hope that he would have freedom soon- of course, that has now been taken away. By writing this scene from the Chairman's POV it meant I couldn't really explain Gakushuu's thinking, but I will probably touch on that in another chapter.**

 **So Nagisa has found out about Karma tracking his phone. Had he found out at a time when he was feeling more emotionally strong/stable, Nagisa might of been angry at Karma, but because he's in a sort of fragile state right now he's balming himself for being 'pathetic' and having someone to track him. Basically he's in a pretty vulnerable state right now..**

 _ **Jenna Lover:** Thank you for all the long reviews :D Sorry for all the emotional strife I am apparently causing haha. You are right about Gakushuu retracting into his own despair ;_;. I haven't decided how I should end this fic yet, but it probably wont be an enternal series of unfortunate events, just a very long one. Thanks for all the kind words :)_

 _ **Miss Ena:**_ Glad you enjoyed the chapter. You're completely right about Nagisa not really being in the right state of mind to call Karma out.. Which is unfortunate.

 _ **Guest:**_ Nagisa hasn't had any assassin training in this story, but I feel like I could work in his bloodlust somehow, at some point.


	20. Chapter 20

**I should honestly just rename this story 'series of unfortunate events'. TW for some violence at the end of the chapter. In some ways it's a teensy bit more graphic than previous chapters because I go into more detail. But if you'v made it this far.**

* * *

Nagisa felt strangely nervous as he walked to school that Monday morning. Maybe he should be used to that by now, after all, he'd been feeling _strange_ all week, ever since that odd 'sleepover' at the Asano household on Tuesday. He hadn't been back to school since then, he hadn't felt well enough. He had a really bad stomach ache in his lower abdomen for the next couple of days and emotionally he just felt drained

Normally, Nagisa was the type to power through school even if he felt a little ill, but at the moment the thought of having to return seemed somehow overwhelming, Nagisa had even considered taking that Monday off, but he decided against it. Besides. Today was the day Karma was returning to school after his week long suspension, Nagisa didn't want to miss that.

Nagisa had spent most of last week in Karma's company either sneaking off to his house or sneaking Karma into his apartment. Nagisa knew that it was a risk- if his mother found out he was still hanging out with Karma, she would absolutely of absolutely flipped her lid and probably would of resorted to staging another suicide attempt. Nagisa felt guilty, but right now, he just didn't want to be by himself for some reason.. being around Karma was the only time he felt calm.

The two of them had spent the weekend lying around watching films, making food together, talking, playing video games.. It had been nice. Nagisa knew part of him was using this just as a way to distract himself from the dark feelings welling inside himself that seemed to surface only when he was alone but he couldn't stop himself. He didn't want to be alone or think about difficult things right now, he just wanted to relax and be with Karma. So he didn't bring up Karma tracking his phone again, or shout at him for being reckless and breaking into the Asano house because he just didn't have the energy to, Nagisa swept all those negative thoughts under the rug, pretending they didn't happen. Besides, maybe Karma was _right_ to be possessive and Nagisa should just sit back and be grateful he has someone looking out for him.

As if his thoughts alone had summoned him, Nagisa suddenly heard Karma's sing-song voice behind him.

"Morning Nagisa!" The red head said, placing an arm around Nagisa's shoulders a wide grin on his face. Nagisa turned to smile back at him.

"You seem surprisingly cheerful to be back at school." Nagisa said to him, before realizing something. "Karma, this isn't usually the way you come to school, is it?"

"I may of took a little detour. I wanted to walk with you." Karma said, sounding almost shy about it. Nagisa liked Karma's rare moments of vulnerability, they were actually kind of _cute._ Of course, he wouldn't tell Karma that, instead he just smiled and walked alongside him. As they got closer to school the crowd of Kunugigaoka students surrounding them became more and more dense and almost all of them were looking at Karma and whispering. Some just gave quick sidelong glances when thinking they had gone unnoticed while others were just outright glaring. Whispers carried through the crowds like ripples through water.

 _"That's Karma Akabane- That's the delinquent that attacked Asano-kun."_

 _"No way! he's allowed back into the school what are they thinking?"_

 _"I heard he beat someone into a pulp in his last school. It's only a matter of time before he strikes again."_

 _"Kya, how scary!"_

 _"Why does that blue haired kid even stick by him? Probably for protection the little leach."_

All the negative attention directed towards them made Nagisa's skin crawl, unconsciously he gripped his bag strap tight until his knuckles turned white and stared at the floor, trying to ignore the accusing eyes surrounding Karma and him, but it was _suffocating._ He wished there was some way of letting this crowd know that Karma wasn't a monster, all his violent acts had been either in self defence or in someone else's glanced up at Karma to see his reaction. He was just staring straight ahead, a carefree smile on his face as if he wasn't the focus of everyone's ire.

But Nagisa could see past that facade of nonchalance; He noticed the tension in Karma's jaw, the fire in his eyes, but what worried Nagisa the most was how tight Karma was holding his fist, as if he were seconds away from punching someone. Nagisa touched his hand subtly with gentle fingers.

"They're full of shit. Don't prove them right" He urged. He knew Karma hated being the centre of attention just like he did. Karma glanced back, giving Nagisa a grateful smile, they were almost at the school gates now so the crowds of students were thicker than ever.

"Sorry Nagisa." Karma replied in an equally quiet tone, before stopping suddenly and turning to address the crowd of students swarming around him. Karma may hate being the centre of attention, but he was still naturally made to be in the spotlight. As soon as he stopped, all eyes were on him, he stood tall, his eyes blazing with mercury fire. "Apparently non of you know any basic etiquette." he said, in a loud voice. "Don't you know it's rude to whisper about someone when they're right next to you, tsk."

 _That_ envoked some mixed reactions from the crowd; A few people had the decency to look abashed while others just scowled at Karma, furious that he of all people had dared to criticize them. Nagisa felt his heart drop as a dozen pairs of eyes bore into Karma and him, _Oh dear._

Karma surveyed the crowd like a predator measuring up his prey, there was something disdainful about his gaze. "Hmm, interesting. All of you are fine talking about me behind my back, but non of you have the balls to say anything to my face. You really are just a bunch of sheep, aren't you?" He said, a malicious grin growing on his face. That _really_ pissed people off- It was like looking into a sea of scowls, but even so, nobody dared to speak up to Karma, in fact, most of them just backed away, one of Gakushuu's minions, Seo Tomoya looked about ready to explode, but even he didn't saw a word. Nagisa would find it amusing if he wasn't so nervous.

"Anyway, I know you all think I'm some sort of brutally violent monster, but I'm here to tell you- " Karma paused for dramatic effect. "- That's absolutely right, so maybe in future you should try harder not to piss me off, kay?"

The students looked at him stunned, even Nagisa wasn't expecting that, he looked up at Karma, actually kind of impressed in a strange way. Karma just tugged Nagisa's sleeve, that deceivingly sweet smile still in place.

"Let's go, we'll be late for class." He said, pulling Nagisa along with him as he walked through the crowd towards the main entrance. Students jumped away from Karma and Nagisa as if they had some sort of disease, practically diving out the way to escape Karma's war path. Nagisa couldn't believe what had happened- _had Karma just managed to terrify the whole school into silence?_ One way Karma was similar to Gakushuu was his influence over others, even if it was in different ways.

"Well. So much for laying low and keeping out of trouble at this school." Karma said bitterly as they reached the main door. Nagisa let out a nervous laugh.

"I'm sure they'll all forget about it within in the next week or so." He said, of course, even he knew that wasn't true.

* * *

All things considered, the rest of the week didn't seem to be go too badly. Nagisa still felt weird and anxious, but he could ignore that when he was busy with school work (he had a lot to catch up on) and had Karma with him all the time. The stares and the whispers aimed at Karma (and occasionally at Nagisa himself) didn't stop, but people were being a little more careful to talk out of Karma's earshot, apparently his statement about being a 'brutally violent monster' had been taken literally and everyone was even more afraid of him than they were before, including some of the teachers.

"So long as they aren't bothering me I don't care what they think." Karma said as the two of them sat and ate lunch in an empty classroom one day.

"I wish I could be as resilient as you." Nagisa had replied, sipping his juice. Karma laughed.

"You shouldn't take the snobs here seriously. These kids are taking my one little scuffle way too seriously. They wouldn't last a day in public school- there's fights every day there." Karma said dismissively. "Honestly. I wouldn't of even gone to this school if it wasn't my last option." He paused, then looked at Nagisa. "But now I'm glad I did."

Nagisa felt himself blush, he looked down at his food. "I'm glad you did too." He said. Nagisa wondered how different his life would be if Karma had never transferred to his school, it was crazy what an impact somebody can have after only knowing them a few months. If Karma hadn't moved here, would Nagisa still be pining after Gakushuu, stuck in a one-sided relationship? Probably. Meeting Karma had made Nagisa gain some self worth back, he had managed to build up enough confidence to confront Gakushuu and dump him. That was the start of their relationship, but now, instead of making him feel confident, Karma made Nagisa feel useless ( _But that wasn't something he wanted to think about_ ).

Speaking of Gakushuu, he seemed to be trying extra hard to avoid Nagisa this week. Of course, he'd hardly ever acknowledged his presence in school before, but the few times they had passed each other in the corridor Gakushuu would quickly snap his head away as if he'd seen something horrific, as if looking at Nagisa caused him physical pain. Every time he did it, it felt like a stab in the gut to Nagisa- _Why is he so offended by my presence? Is it because his Dad found out about us? does he blame me?_ Unfortunately, Nagisa seemed to see Gakushuu a _lot_ that week; he spoke at assemblies as usual and on Wednesday there had been a school-wide baseball tournament and of _course_ Gakushuu was one of the star players on the winning team. Every time Nagisa saw him, Gakushuu was his usual self; All winning smiles and commanding presence, but he was sure there was something more below the surface. He just wished he could ask.

* * *

On Friday, Nagisa waited for Karma as he packed his bag in the now-empty classroom. The red head had been napping through the last two classes of the day, even their teacher hadn't dared disturb him. It was only after the bell to signal the end of school rang that Karma roused, unabashedly, from his nap. Most students would be mortified if they realised they'd been napping in class. Not Karma.

"Damn. I need to start bringing a pillow to school or something. These desks are so hard they're going to give me neck problems." Karma complained, stretching his arms out and yawning leisurely.

"Remind me again how you're one of the top scorers in the school?" Nagisa dead-panned, rolling his eyes. "Let's go- we could still make our usual train."

"Actually, I have some dumb after school meeting with the school I have to go on today." Karma said, stifling yet another yawn and standing up. "It's a 'review' of how I'm 'settling in' a week after my suspension. Apparently it's policy. So you should go on ahead by yourself.

 _I'm walking home by myself?_ Nagisa thought, involuntarily his eyes widened and the blood drained from his face. The thought of being alone, without Karma, with all those people on the train scared him. _After all, your just a pathetic idiot, Nagisa. You can't look after yourself, your too weak and stupid. You need Karma to protect you._

"Nagisa? What's wrong?" Karma said, sounding slightly alarmed by the obvious panic on Nagisa's face. He put his hand on the other's shoulders. "Hey- I don't have to go to this stupid meeting. I can walk you home if you want me to. In fact, I'd far rather do that."

Nagisa shook his head, realising what he'd been thinking. "No- No of course I can get home by myself." He said, forcing a smile. _I'm becoming too much of a burden._ "I've been getting home by myself all year before I met you. I think I can manage, see you later, Karma."

Nagisa quickly scanned the classroom to check they were definitely alone, before leaning forwards and kissing Karma briefly on the mouth then heading out the door."I'll see you later, Karma- " He said, forcing his smile still in place so he wouldn't worry the other. "And remember to be polite at the meeting, I don't want you to get suspended again!"

Karma didn't look convinced, but he called back. "Fine, just text me when you get back."

* * *

Nagisa sighed as he stepped out of the school gate. He hated himself for it, but he already felt jittery and uneasy _This is just the trip home from school, I've done it alone hundreds of times before I met Karma it's stupid to feel scared,_ but the feelings didn't go away- Nagisa felt as if there were pinpricks in his skin, as if he were suddenly ice cold and sweaty at the same time. His heart was thumping in his chest and every little sound he heard made him jump. He felt hyper-vigilant, constantly over-aware and ready for attack. The feeling was almost unbearable, it made him want to tear his skin off.

Nagisa was vaguely aware that a small group of male students were walking behind him. Every footstep set off an earthquake in Nagisa's mind, he felt like a gazelle being stalked by a lion, the killer drawing inevitable closer. _I'm being stupid. They aren't following me, they don't even notice me. They're just walking home._ Nagisa tried to assure himself, but it did little good, he still walked faster trying to resist the urge to break into a run. He just wanted to get home already and loose these guys, but they just kept walking behind him. _Well duh, they're probably walking to the station as well._ Nagisa thought, trying to be rational.

The foot steps got closer and closer, Nagisa could tell there was three of them and they were probably bigger than him, but he dared not look behind. They were practically on his heel now, he could hear the heavy sound of them breathing _please just pass me, please just pass me_ he internally begged. But they didn't. Instead, Nagisa felt a heavy hand grab his shoulder from behind.

His reaction was instant; Nagisa stepped away, turning around to look at his assailant, arms held out in front of himself protectively. Stood before him were three fellow students, he recognized two of them; Tanaka, the son of his nosy neighbour- He had a stocky build and a round face. Stood next to him, as always, was Takada, a lanky boy with sharp features and a constant sneer. The two of them didn't look particularly intimidating, but they had picked on Nagisa and pushed him around since elementary school. They might not be that strong, but the two of them had always been stronger than Nagisa. The third person worried Nagisa more; Seo Tomoya, one of the Asano's cronies. He was a tall with a wide build, bulbous nose and mean eyes.

"Heh, you're awfully jumpy when Akabane isn't here to protect you." Seo said, his grin widening becoming almost lecherous. Nagisa glared at him and backed away until he felt the wall bump up against his back.

"What do you want?" Nagisa asked, hating the way his hands began to shake. The three of them surrounded him, cutting off his escape routes.

" _'W- What do you want_ '." Seo mimicked in a mockingly high-pitch voice. He rolled his eyes before glancing at Tanaka and Takada. "Your right. He really is pathetic."

Tanaka and Takada both nodded, happy to be recognised by one of the big five.

"He is, isn't he?" Takada said, nodding. Nagisa continued to look at them, looking for an escape route.. _Why would somebody as proud as Seo team up with losers like Takada and Tanaka?_ Nagisa didn't want to stay and find out, he made a move to leave, but almost predictably, Seo pushed him back, hard, Nagisa's back hit the wall once again.

"How rude. We aren't done talking." Seo leered, clearly enjoying Nagisa's fear and the power he had over him. "Now I've been looking for a way to get Akabane back ever since he attacked Asano and got him into trouble. Nobody attacks our leader and gets away with it." He paused. "But Akabane is too much of a maniac to fight head on so I was a loss of what to do- but then Tanaka and Takada informed me that _you're_ Akabane's little puppy and he'd probably be distraught if anything happened to you."

At this, Seo grabbed Nagisa's tie and pulled him up so their faces were almost touching, Nagisa could feel his breath on his cheek _disgusting._ "Get off me!" Nagisa whimpered, trying to pull away, but that just made his tie tighter around his neck. The other three laughed at his struggles, but Nagisa felt as if his body had been plunged into ice, his mind was going haywire, it was difficult to breath, he was choking- he was sure he was choking, he could feel his windpipe closing over.

"So, I thought, maybe if we roughed you up a little, Akabane would get the message that Gakushuu Asano is not someone he should be messing with." Seo said, letting go off Nagisa's tie and pushing him back into the wall hard enough for Nagisa to fall to the ground. Nagisa sat there, choking on air, trying to get his breath back. But the harder he tried to breath, the more his chest constricted- was this an asthma attack? But he didn't even have asthma!

"G- Gakushuu wont want you t-to do this." Nagisa gasped out. Every word was a struggle, he was sure he was loosing oxygen right now, he could see black dots across his vision.

"What did you say!" Seo growled, grabbing Nagisa by the hair and forcing his face to meet his. Nagisa suddenly felt as if he didn't have the energy to fight back anymore. He was vaguely aware of Tanaka and Takada stood behind Seo, snickering. "What do _you_ know about what Asano wants? And How _dare_ a nobody like you presume to call him by his given name!"

Nagisa gritted his teeth; The panic squeezing his throat like a boa constrictor, the pain from having his hair pulled, it focus, he'd slipped up by calling him Gakushuu. He didn't know _what_ to do. _Beg for forgiveness? Threaten them?_ He just wanted to escape. He was so scared he couldn't stand it.

"Hey! Listen to me you little rat!" Seo shouted, his eyes bulging in anger, but there was till enjoyment in them. He was enjoying this, Nagisa felt like he was going to die and Seo was having _fun._ Nagisa didn't reply, he literally felt unable to speak, breathing was hard enough. The next thing he knew, he felt a sudden pain in his gut. He realised belatedly Seo had kicked him. He rolled on the floor, clutching his stomach, looking up at the three menacing figures above him. They were going to hurt him and there was nothing he could do to stop it

The a feeling hit Nagisa it was something powerful and beyond fear; bloodlust. It was if he were on autopilot, all he knew was that he _didn't_ want to let these guys hurt him. Ignoring the pain, Nagisa stayed in his crouched down position, then dove forwards right into Seo's legs. Taken by surprise, Seo fell backwards, smacking into the hard pavement. Before Seo even had a chance to react, Nagisa was on top of him, hitting him. Nagisa wasn't exactly strong, but it still hurt.

With a pained grunt, Seo grabbed Nagisa's wrists. "Don't just stand there, idiots! Get him!" Seo growled at the other two, who had been standing around in shock. Tanaka and Takada sprung into action and Nagisa was unable to dodge their hits as Seo held him in place.

So without even thinking about it, Nagisa lent forwards and bit Seo hard on one of his hard hands wrapped around his wrists. First he tasted the copper of blood, then he heard a blood curdling scream and then he felt the sensation of flesh being teared away between his teeth and Seo finally let go of his wrists. Nagisa stood up so quickly he almost headbutted Tanaka.

Seo screamed on the floor, clutching his hand that now had blood oozing from it. Nagisa spat out the small wad flesh onto the pavement along with a mouthful of blood. He looked up at his other two attackers. Maybe it was the fierce look in his eyes or the fresh blood dribbling down his chin or the screams of their fallen comrade, but Tanaka and Takada both backed away as quickly as they could. Not sparing them a second glance, Nagisa picked up his bag and ran, the iron taste of blood still on his tongue.

* * *

 **Whenever I write a chapter I always write a brief plan of like, five things I want to happen in said chapter, but I usually only manage to write two before the chapter gets too long/I find a place I really want to end the chapter.**

 **Nagisa has internalized Karma's message of ' you can't look after yourself', and he's also pretty traumatised from what happened at the Asnao place even if he didn't remember it. Also He had a panic attack during the fight scene hence the feelings of being unable to breath etc, I've been lucky to only have panic attacks a handful of times, for me trying to fight it is the worst, I recommend just sipping some water and riding it out. But in the end he just snapped and went on autopilot to fight, I'm not sure if that's realistic for someone having a panic attack, but I do know people react all sorts of ways when backed into a corner so eh.**

 **I wanted to show some of Karma's sweet side in this chapter, even though he still has a ton of issues with how he treats Nagisa.. his hearts in the right place (kinda). IDk, it's a complicated one!**

 **Super big thank you for all the people who reviewed last chapter, I love reading reviews and hearing what people think, especially last chapter because it ended up being one I really enjoyed writing.**

 **Please review if I should keep writing more**

 **Replying**

 **Miss Ena: Thank you for commenting! And yes I think one of Gakushuu's biggest issues is that he's so isolated ;_;**

 ** _JennaLover:_** I always look forward to reading your reviews! They're so long and passionate, it makes me really happy to see someone get so invested in the story! Your right, almost every character is having a lot of mental health problems. I don't like to medacalise things too much because it's pressure to portray mental illness' properly, but Nagisa certainly has an anxiety disorder and Gakushuu pretty much ticks the box for most of the symptoms of PTSD.

And Yeah, even if he is a 'genius' Gakuho is also an idiot for not taking Gakushuu trying to crash the car seriously because it's 'not logical', he'll almost certainly pay the price for that I'm just not sure how yet. Yes, Shu along with must of these characters deserve nice loving families instead of the garbage they come from.

Sorry Nagisa isn't fairing much better in this chapter either (I guess he was a bit happier towards the start). Thank you for your lovely comment! Happy reading!


	21. Chapter 21

**So it has been WAY too long since I updated this. I almost doubt that anyone will read it, especially since a lot of my more dedicated reviewers were guests, but anyway.. Thank you to everyone who reviewed, it really encouraged me to bring out this next chapter!**

* * *

Nagisa didn't even remember getting home. He knew he must of walked to the station, made it past the barriers and sat on the train, but he had no recollection of his journey. The only thing he could think about was the pain in his body, and the taste of blood in his mouth that seemed to linger no matter how much water he drank.

As soon as he walked in, Nagisa quickly locked the door, then ran into his bedroom and dived under his quilt, feeling a rush of relief. He'd made it home without anyone following him home, without Seo or Tanaka returning for retribution. For a little while, he was safe.

In reality, Nagisa knew he still had a lot to worry about; He could get in trouble with the school for fighting.. he'd hurt Seo pretty badly, what if he was expelled? Or what if Seo came back for revenge with more goons? Karma won't be there to protect him all the time. Karma... should he tell Karma what happened? But Karma would probably attack Seo and then get expelled again.. he didn't want that. But he didn't want to lie, either... God. He really was useless, he couldn't manage one journey by himself without being attacked. If Karma was there it wouldn't of happened... karma was right.. he couldn't look after himself..

Nagisa was too exhausted to properly process all the worries swirling about his head, so he tuned them out. He felt completely drained from all the stress and fighting. So Nagisa simply sent a text to Karma saying he made it home, then fell asleep a few seconds later, still wearing his uniform.

* * *

 _"Nagisa."_

 ** _"Nagisa!"_**

Nagisa was awoken from a dreamless sleep by the feeling of skinny fingers digging into his shoulders and shaking him awake. He opened his bleary eyes to see his mother stood over him, and he quickly sat up.

"Oh for goodness sake Nagisa! You're still wearing your uniform?" She tutted. Nagisa could tell by her expression she was angry, he instantly felt a thrill of dread. He tried desperately to gage what was going on.

"Mum, is everything okay?" Nagisa questioned, pulling himself quickly out of bed. Hiromi just shook her head in exasperation.

"Just put on a clean shirt and come into the dining room. And for gods sake, comb your hair. Be quick about it." Hiromi hissed, in a low and dangerous voice, before turning to leave the room.

Put on a clean shirt? They must have guests. Sure enough, Nagisa could hear the muffled murmurings of conversation in the other room. Who could that be? With great haste, Nagisa quickly changed into clean clothes and dragged a comb through his hair, before making his way into the dining room, trying his best not to look as though he'd been asleep moments earlier.

Nagisa felt his heart drop when he saw who was there. Tanaka and his mother were both sat at the table, drinking the tea from Hiromi's best cups. It was clear from a glance that the two of them were mother and son; they both had the same stocky build, bulbous noses and tiny eyes that seemed slightly too spherical. As soon as he saw him walk in, Tanaka gave Nagisa a quick sneer, before his expression returned to neutral.

"Nagisa- " Hiromi said, her voice sharp. "Tanaka here says you've been fighting at school."

"No- That's not it- " Nagisa said quickly, trying to defend himself.

"Oh? So you didn't bite that boy from your school, Seo Tomoya, so hard he started bleeding?" Tanaka's mother said in an accusatory tone. Nagisa felt as if he'd walked into a Lion's den. They'd all clearly been talking about him before he'd entered, and they'd all decided upon his guilt.

"He attacked me first." Nagisa said weakly. "I wouldn't just- "

"I didn't tell on you to get you into trouble, Nagisa, I'm worried about you." Tanaka said, in a sickly-sweet simpering tone. "You never used to get into fights- I think it's hanging around with that Delinquent Akabane. He's a bad influence."

"Tanaka you attacked me first along with- " Nagisa started to say, but was cut off by his mother's shrill shriek.

"Akabane! I thought I told you not to associate with that riffraff!"

"Oh, Ms Shiota, Nagisa sticks to Akabane like glue every day in school." Tanaka said, a devious smirk on his face as he realised he was getting Nagisa into even more trouble. Nagisa wanted to dive across the table and beat him with his mother's best teacup.

"Nagisa, how could you? You've disobeyed me. I knew Akabane was dangerous and now look- he's got you fighting like a wild animal!" Hiromi cried, aghast.

"That's not Karma's fault- Seo, Tanaka and Tadaka attacked me- " Nagisa said, desperately. This was unfair. It was so unfair.

"I don't care about your excuses, Nagisa, fighting is unlady like, and I won't have you doing it." His mother shouted. Nagisa felt his cheeks burn with a mixture of humiliation and rage as she talked about him being 'lady like' in front of other people.

"Yes Nagisa, you have to remember to be lady-like." Tanaka said, with a hardly repressed snicker. Nagisa glared, feeling helpless against everyone in the room.

"Well. I just thought we'd make you aware, Ms Shiota." Tanaka's mother said, getting up from her seat with a prim expression. "Thank you for the tea. We'll see ourselves out."

And with that, the mother and son duo left, not before Tanaka sent Nagisa a smug and knowing grin.

As soon as they were out the apartment, Hiromi dropped all restraint. She grabbed a fistful of Nagisa's hair, forcing his head down towards the floor, and started screaming.

"Why do you always chose to disappoint me!?"

It carried on until she was exhausted; Hiromi screamed, cried, pushed him, pulled his hair, grabbed a knife and threatened to slit her throat (since you don't care either way!). She made him promise not to speak to Karma again (something he said just to sate her)

It went on for hours, then finally Hiromi swallowed one of her sleeping pills and stormed off to bed.

Nagisa was left there, trying to catch his breath. His body ached and his ears stung. He felt as if he'd just been hit by a hurricane. Now what? How was he supposed to be with Karma if Tanaka was keeping tabs on him even at school? There was no escape. Shakily, Nagisa pulled out his phone and typed a message to Karma.

'We should run away together'

His finger hovered over the 'send' button, before instead, deleting the message and going back to his room. He'd work something out in the morning. He had to. He couldn't live without Karma.

* * *

Karma walked out the corner shop with two bags full of the best comfort food known to man; there was pocky, of course, hot chocolate mix and some particularly tasty instant ramen. Nagisa had seemed a little on edge this week, so he wanted to cheer him up when he saw him later this weekend. He knew Nagisa's problems weren't something you could eat away, but having nice food can at least make a bad situation feel a little better.

His 'progress meeting' had been a complete waste of time, he just had to spew out some bullshit about how he had 'reflected on his bad behaviour' and was 'staying on the right path' to a disinterested councillor. Karma would of much rather gone home with Nagisa like he had done for the past two weeks.

The past two weeks had been pretty good, actually, the other students clearly hated him but were too afraid to hassle him, so he got to spent all his time with Nagisa, which was just how he liked it. Nagisa had seemed a little fragile and more clingy than usual, but Karma wasn't complaining; he enjoyed Nagisa relying on him.

Karma was walking back to his house (a mere 2 minutes away) when he felt someone bump into him so hard he was sure it had to be on purpose. Damn he almost dropped his bags.

"Have you ever heard of looking were your going?" Karma growled, turning to look at the offender, some guy in a hoodie. His eyes widened when he saw the face- he'd recognise those damn Violet eyes anywhere. Fate hated him. "Asano. Of course."

Gakushuu looked back at him, his face was flushed red and his eyes were hazy, there was something about his stance that seemed unsteady. _Was he sick? Had he caught whatever bug Nagisa had last week?_

"Akabane. What a strange coincidence I'd see you now of all times." Gakushuu said, glaring at Karma. Karma expected him to carry on walking, but instead Gakushuu lurched forwards suddenly until he was inches from Karma's face. His eyes, although unfocused, were intent and brimming with emotion.

"You're a nasty piece of work, you know that?" Asano hissed, and Karma swore he could smell alcohol on his breath. "You're rude and and arrogant- you're constantly getting into trouble.."

"You're one to talk- " Karma hissed glaring at Asano. He seemed completely disheveled, Karma wondered why it only ever seemed to be him who saw the rough side of Asano that hid beneath that 'perfect' visage.

"But you know, maybe you aren't so bad." Asano said, cutting Karma off before he could finish his sentence. "You aren't a complete idiot and you do care about Nagisa, don't you?"

"More than you ever could." Karma said, narrowing his eyes. This whole interaction had taken a strange turn, it was hard to keep up.

"Probably." Asano said, an unreadable expression flitting across his face, before he returned to glaring at Karma with those unfocused eyes. "You need to look after Nagisa, okay? Don't mess him around, don't let anyone hurt him. Protect him."

Karma was about to retort, and tell Asano was a hypocrite he was being, saying at that. All Karma had ever done was protect Nagisa! He didn't need the likes of Asano telling him that. But as soon as he finished speaking, Asano just walked past Karma, continuing on down the street. Karma glared after him. What was wrong with him? Asano was a mess. He was an overachiever, a perfectionist, control freak, yet completely out of control, wandering the streets drunk.

Karma was hit an uneasy feeling that, if he didn't go after Asano now, he would never see him again.

* * *

 **The end! Next part will show us how Asano got to the point that he is at the end of this chapter. Thanks for all the support so far, lease review for more!**

 **Miss Ena;** Thanks for the review! I was going for the 'false sense of security' vibe in the last chapter, so I'm glad that came across. And I wanted to showcase Nagisa's ability to defend himself (even if he doesn't recognize it), so I'm glad you enjoyed that too.

 **Falaffle:** Wow thank you for such kind words! I'm honoured you hold this fic in such high regard :o I agree that I can rush chapters sometimes (this one is no exception, unfortunetly), hopefully future ones will be longer.

 **Rivaelle:** Yeah, Nagisa's definitely not a weakling by any measure, not even in this story. The end of this chapter shows how Gakushuu's facade has completely broken down, the next Chapter will go back and show how. But yeah, you're right about Gakushuu being able to manage his reputation on autopilot pretty much, even though he's been mentally shattered. I think the Chairman's redemption arc in cannon is mostly good, but he does get off a little easy in some ways. The Chairman in this story is pretty much so evil he's almost a completely different character (probably the most ooc) and I definitely wont be redeeming him.

 **Guest:** Thanks for reviewing! I'm glad you were able to relate to the story on some level, hope everything is alright


	22. Chapter 22

**AN: Sooo it's been a while. This chapter just seemed to take a loong time to write. So a big thanks to everyone who's stuck around till now. Trigger warning in this chapter for dark themes, but if you've made it this far, then you probably already know that.**

 **This Chapter is Asano's POV, following his version over the two weeks from the night Karma and Nagisa stayed over, until the point he meets Karma in the previous chapter.**

* * *

When Gakushuu returned to school after the events of that night, he was shocked by just how normal everything seemed as soon as he entered the classroom. It was still early when he arrived, but being the dedicated class they were, there were already a couple of students already at their desk.

"Oh, Asano-kun. Good morning." Koyama said, looking up from his flash cards with a toothy grin.

"Good morning." Asano replied, shocked by how easy it was to banish all fear and anger from his voice. Koyama narrowed his eyes; the concealer couldn't quite disguise the bruises on Asano's face.

"Did something happen to you?" Koyama asked. A smile automatically came to Asano's face.

"Karate practice." He said, casually. Koyama shuddered.

"That's why I avoid contact spot." He said with a grimace. He didn't question the bruises any further so Asano must of fooled him, or maybe he just didn't care to pursue it.. Asano sat at his desk, pulling out books as he always did. He thought back to the journey here with his father.. he couldn't believe his own actions. _Had he really, purposefully crashed the car? Did he really mean to kill both himself and his Dad?_ He didn't even know the answer himself.

After _the incident_ with the car, the rest of the journey had been completed in silence with the Chairman glancing back at him through the mirror every few seconds, as if he were looking at a wild animal that could snap at any second. The doors had been locked shut. When they reached the school, they both got out the car, and Gakushuu couldn't help but notice the scratches along the side of the previous immaculate black paint work. _Father would be furious_.

But the Chairman didn't say anything, he just strode over and stood in front of his son. For a second, Asano expected to be hit, but instead, his father just stared at him for a long time with searching eyes. Asano felt a creeping uncomfortable feeling, but held his gaze.

"Behave yourself. No more foolishness." The Chairman said, a clear warning in his voice. Giving Asano a final uncertain gaze, the Chairman walked away towards his office.

The rest of the morning went almost too smoothly; He explained away the bruises to his classmates with that simple lie about intense karate training, then spent the morning as he usually would do; Spewing some falsely positive lines to his followers, sitting diligently in class, answering the teacher's questions. It was almost as if the events of the previous night didn't happen, and sat in this very ordinary classroom, surrounded by normality, Gakushuu could hardly believe that a few hours ago he had seriously attempted a murder-suicide.

 _Was that really what he intended? Had Gakushuu really wanted to kill himself and his father?_ He wondered yet again. It scared him to think he was capable of such a thing. He didn't even want to think about it..

Gakushuu felt as if he spent the rest of the day in something of a robotic daze- Although his body ached and his mind was hazy from sleep deprivation, he carried on going through the motions; speaking with a smile, completing his work, discussing student-council matters. It kept him just busy enough that thoughts of Nagisa didn't consume him completely. Gakushuu didn't feel angry or sad or anything, just numb.

At lunch time, Kaho tried to approach him, but he quickly left before she had a chance to speak to him. He felt a stab of guilt.. _if his father found out about her, would her fate be the same as Nagisa's?_ How many more people had to suffer because of him..

During final period, Gakushuu's feelings of dull apathy dissipated and gave way to jittery nerves as he realised in less than an hour he would be expected to return to the house were his father resided. _Why did I have to crash the car? I'm going to be in so much trouble...!_ Gakushuu considered forcing a friend to let him stop over, or maybe just paying for a hotel for the night (he had the money) but the decision was made for him when he left the classroom and saw his father waiting outside for him.

With his imposing figure and authoritarian aura, the Chairman attracted lots of curious and nervous stares from passing students. The Chairman hardly ever graced the school corridors with his presence, even the teacher gave him a reverent look. Gakushuu balked as soon as he saw him, and for a second seriously considered the option of jumping out the window to escape. But no. There was nothing he could do.

"Chairman Asano." He greeted stiffly. His father smiled at him, and it was nothing but unnerving.

"Asano-kun." The Chairman replied. "Come with me."

Gakushuu once again felt the urge to jump out of the window, but instead he just nodded and followed the man to whatever fate awaited him.

Gakushuu's punishment for crashing the car wasn't anywhere near as severe as he was expecting. Of course, he got slapped a few times, and called pathetic, and it went without saying that he had to pay for the damage, but in relation to the other forms of punishment his father had doled out to him over the years, it was beyond tame.

Gakushuu wasn't sure why. Maybe it's because his father understood what he'd done as little as he did himself. Maybe, just maybe, he had frightened his father just a tiny bit, and the man didn't want to push it any further.

Either way, Gakushuus life returned to normal, as if the whole incident hadn't happened at all. Well. Normal on the outside at least; remembering what happened to Nagisa was still unbearable. But Gakushuu carried on going to school and doing extracurricular clubs and student council, keeping himself constantly busy so he didn't have time to tear himself apart. It didn't really work though..

As Friday began and the weekend approached, Gakushuu felt an impending sense of doom at the thought of Saturday and Sunday. It was just two days without school, but at the moment that seemed like a life sentence.

"What's up Asano? You seem on edge." Ren commented, after catching Gakushuu tapping his foot for about the fifth time since lunch ended.

Gakushuu seriously considered asking to stay over at his place, but after the Nagisa incident, he really did not want the Chairman to get any strange ideas about who he was close with. He didn't want anyone else hurt.

"I'm fine." He said resolutely, feeling anything but. He willed the minutes to slow down, but time marched on at an accelerated pace, and before he knew it, the bell rung marking the end of school for two whole days. He heard sighs of relief from his classmates, but he had to repress a shudder.

That strange feeling, the frantic desire to destroy himself and everything around him was creeping back. He'd have to make student council last as long as possible..

* * *

"You better clear out now, or you'll end up locked in here over the weekend." The caretaker said with a fond smile as he opened the door to the student council room. The sun had long since set, and the other members had gone home, Gakushuu sat alone, illuminated only by his laptop screen, praying for time to stand still.

"I can think of worse ways to spend a weekend." Gakushuu said, getting up and packing his laptop away, moving almost in slow motion. The janitor chuckled. He wasn't joking.

"Don't work yourself too hard now. Don't forget, you're still young." The man said.

Gakushuu kept his hands in his pockets as he walked towards home. He was surprised his father still allowed him this small freedom, after everything he'd done, he supposed his father hadn't taken it seriously when he'd crashed the car. He glanced down at his phone. One 'compromise' he'd had to make was to allow his father to place a tracking app on his mobile.

He said it was to stop him from getting ' _distracted_ ' again. Just another way the metaphorical chains around him were tightening, becoming increasingly constricted inch by inch.

 _Was this what the rest of his life would be now?_ The thought made him want to hurl himself off a bridge.

"Hey, blondie!" A voice shouted, pulling Gakushuu away from his thoughts. "Give me a smile."

Gakushuu turned to see a disheveled man leaning against a truck in a near by parking lot. Gakushuu could tell he was drunk just by looking at him- the way he was swaying and the opened can of beer in his hand was a big giveaway. He was almost certainly one of the truckers that drove in from across the continent to make deliveries. After hours of driving, they usually slept in their trucks before making the journey back.

Gakushuu rolled his eyes, before turning back and starting to walk away. The man wasn't deterred.

"Ahh, come on. Don't walk away. I just want to talk. We can have some fun together." The man shouted. Gakushuu felt something inside him snap, and he found himself storming back towards the man. He wasn't sure what he was planning on doing- to hit the guy, to shout at him, to knock the beer out of his hands. The guy, for his part, looked surprised his pick-up tactic had actually worked.

"That's a good lad. Come here. Let's have a chat." The drunkard said. He lifted his beer can. "Have something to drink."

"Do you know I'm under the legal drinking age? This is a public area. Near a school no less. This isn't the place to be a drunken mess." Gakushuu reprimanded, his tone like a school teachers. The guy just laughed.

"Yeah. You could definitely do with a drink." He said, pressing the beer against Gakushuus shirt. Asano narrowed his eyes, the man stunk of larger and petrol. "What's the matter. You aren't scared are you?"

Against his better judgement, Gakushuu snatched the beer from the man's hand and drank a sip. It tasted worse than he expected, but he didn't let that show on his face. He wasn't sure why he was doing something so stupid, but the urge to do something destructive had returned at full force.

"There's a good lad." The man laughed. "Not such a goody-two shoes after all." He paused mid sentence, and fixed Gakushuu a more intense look, as if properly seeing him for the first time. "God. You're beautiful you are."

Gakushuu resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Then he realised something. "How long are you here for?" He asked curtly. The guy replied;

"Just for tonight, I'm driving back home tomorrow, so long as I'm not hungover- "

"Do you have somewhere we could go. Somewhere private?" Gakushuu cut him off. The man's eyes widened in shock an excitement.

"Are you serious? You want to- there's a mattress in my truck.." the guy said. "God I don't even know your name, my name is- "

"I don't care." Gakushuu said, cutting him off again. "My name isn't important. And I don't have much time- "

The guy was clearly flabbergasted, but didn't want to waste this opportunity. "Just follow me- "

Gakushuu looked at him. He probably wasn't as old as he had first thought- there were premature lines from smoking and grafting- but the guy was easily early thirties. His dark hair was cropped short and there was a whisper of stubble growing on his face. Definitely not someone Gakushuu was attracted to. But he didn't care. He just wanted to feel something physical and forget about everything for a while. Unlike his school mates, this guy would be gone by tomorrow. There would be nobody else for his father to torture.

* * *

It was dark by the time Gakushuu returned home. Adrenaline still ran through him, alcohol as well. It helped numb the fear of two days at probably should of expected it, when his father descended down the staircase as soon as he returned home, an ice-cold smile on his face.

"Asano. Is walking home really so much of a struggle for you that it took you over an hour?" He asked, voice filled with false concern.

"Apparently." Was Gakushuu's defiant reply. He couldn't be bothered to come up with an excuse. His father fixed him an intense look.

"I suggest you don't try to get cheeky with me, Asano. Where have you been?" The Chairman asked.

"Check the tracking app if you're so curious." Gakushuu bit back. The car park had been on the way home. So there were no diversions. He started up the stairs, going to walk past his father, but the man put a hand on his shoulder stopping him. Gakushuu instantly started to regret how defiant he'd been. He expected a reprimand, but his father just held his shoulder for what felt like a long time, staring at Gakushuu, saying nothing.

"If you will excuse me sir, I have homework to do- "

"You stink." His father said, in a low and dangerous voice. "You stink of booze, and of cigarette smoke, and of another person. What have you been doing?"

Gakushuu suddenly felt dread spike through him. _Shit_. "There were some delinquents from another school smoking and drinking. I told them to stop, one of them threw their drink at me, but don't worry I- "

" _ **Liar**_!" His father roared, pushing Gakushuu away with force. He lost his footing on the stairs, stumbling down, hardly managing to grab the banister to stop himself from hitting the floor, he looked up, to see his father approaching him, not even bothering to hide his rage, his eyes glazed over with pure fury. On instinct, he pulled himself up and sped towards the door, but the Chairman had grabbed a fistful of his hair before he even managed to touch the handle.

"Tell me what you've done!" His father hissed, yanking him around to face him. The impact was painful, but Gakushuu felt something snap inside him. He didn't care about himself. _What could his father do to him that was worse than he'd already done?_ So instead of cowering and making excuses, he replied.

"I had sex with some stranger I met in the street." He was surprised by how calm his voice sounded. "I didn't even know him. Just some random drunk guy who was interested."

His father actually loosened his grip on him. His eyes widened in shock. The Chairmans obvious stupefaction added fuel to Gakushuus fire, he continued with even more vigour.

"He gave me some beer so I drank it, then . We didn't even use protection." Well that last part was a lie. Gakushuu felt a vindictive thrill run through him as a look of horror flashed through the other man's eyes. _Good_. The worse he could make him feel, the better. His father looked at him, searching for a sign Gakushuu was lying to him. Gakushuu felt his lips curl into an involuntary smile, and a few low chuckles slipped out.

The Chairman looked so fucking stupid with that dumbfounded look on his face. Like a robot with a glitch.

The next thing Gakushuu felt his shoulders being grabbed in a deathly tight grip, his father was glaring at him-bug eyed as if he could not bear to comprehend what Gakushuu had just said. Terror mixed with amusement spiked through him and Gakushuu once again found himself chuckling, with a mixture of nerves and genuine humour.

"What the hell is wrong with you? You! Disgusting- !" His father looked as if he was having problems forming words, so instead, he simply raised his fist and punched Gakushuu in the head as hard as he could. Gakushuu felt a dull pain, then another one as he fell backwards and whacked his head against the door, then down onto the the floor, then everything went black.

* * *

Gakushuu opened his eyes and saw nothing. He couldn't remember where he was, how long he'd been unconscious or why everything hurt so badly.

"So, you're finally back in the world of the living." A cold voice said. Gakushuu looked up and saw the blurry sillouhet of his father stood over him. Instantly, his memories came flooding back, and Gakushuu felt a sudden pang of regret and fear. He tried to speak to tell him it was a mistake, to beg for forgiveness, anything, but all that came out was muffled whimpering. He'd been gagged. Trying to move revealed to him his hands were stuck behind his back also, leaving him lying on his stomach on the floor of- wherever this was.

His first instinct was to panic blindly.

 _Wait. Be calm. Try to figure out where he was and what was happening._

He had no idea how much time passed since he'd been knocked out.. it could of been minutes, it could of been hours. The room was completely dark, and his vision was blurry.. but judging by the texture of the floor it was one of the bathrooms.

"I've gotten a little tired of you speaking so disrespectfully to me, this sound is much more satisfying." His father sneered, clearly far more composed than he had been during their last interaction. Gakushuu tried to look up, straining to see him. His entire body hurt. If he'd had to guess he'd say his father had continued to beat him even after he'd fallen unconscious. The man was furious, he'd never knocked Gakushuu out cold before. Of course, that was what Gakushuu had wanted, w _asn't it? To make his father angry?_ Now he wasn't so sure.

"I'm at my wits end with you, I really am." The Chairman said, shaking his head. "I thought you couldn't sink any lower than you already have, but clearly you're depravity knows no bounds."

Gakushuu couldn't reply, so he continued.

"Even I'm struggling to know how to reprimand you, how to properly re-educate you: I'm starting to think you may be a lost cause." His father said, standing over him, digging a shoe into his side, painfully. "And I should just dispose of you."

Before Gakushuu had a chance to properly comprehend those words, his father slowly and deliberately pulled something out of his pocket. Gakushuus eyes caught a gleam of silver. Shit. A knife. He was actually going to thought he didn't care about living, but he didn't want to be killed like felt another muffled whimper escape his mouth, he started begging, despite being unable to make words. His father just snickered, and crouched down over him, grabbing him by the hair and pulling his head back, exposing his neck, vital blood vessels pumping beneath. He tried in vain to pull away. _He was going to die!_

"But then I thought." His father said, cool voice cutting over the sounds of Gakushuu's panic. "That it would be such a waste to get rid of my only son that way." He said, clearly enjoying Gakushuus fear. "But he still needs to be punished. He needs a permanent reminder not to betray me." The man said, his eyes traveling down the others body. "Perhaps I should take one of your fingers, to remind you not to touch anyone else- " he traced the knife down his neck, across his back and brought it to rest on Gakushuus little finger. He let it rest there a moment, listen to his son's strained breaths before moving the knife suddenly, holding it centimetres away from Gakushuus eye. "Or maybe I could pierce your eyeball so you won't look at anybody else." He snickered. Gakushuu screwed his eye shut on instinct, he was beyond terrified; he could be torn apart piece by piece and he was helpless to stop it.

 _Why had he been so driven to enrage his dad? Why did he keep doing stupid, self-destructive things?_ Once again, he tried to speak, knowing only muffled sounds would come out.

The knife stayed in front of his eye for a long time, he lay there, tensing, waiting for the sudden pain of his eyeball being pierced at any moment.

"But I don't want to have a blinded, maimed son." The Chairman said after a long while. He pulled the knife away. Gakushuu didn't even have the chance to feel relieved before he felt a sudden, searing pain. The knife was being dragged across his back.

It _fucking_ hurt.

He tried to move, break free, _anything!_ But he was helpless. As always.

At first it was just a white-hot pain that overwhelmed his senses, then Gakushuu realised what the other was doing. The Chairman was carving something into his back. This was his permanent reminder.

* * *

Hours later, Gakushuu was back in his bedroom. His back stung. It wasn't the worst pain he'd ever dealt with, but right now, he didn't have the fortitude to cope with it. He stood in the corner of the room, staring into the mirror, still cracked from where he had punched it. His distorted expression stared back at him.

He turned around, and lifted his shirt. He was met with mass of white bandaging, tentatively, he brushed his finger over the gauze, almost daring himself to touch it- to pull it away and see the damage. But he didn't move. He didn't want to know.

The horror of what had just happened filled his mind once again, penetrating his every thought. And what had happened to Nagisa. And all the other times his father had hurt him. A life time of it. Not that long ago, Gakushuu honestly thought he had a good life, overall. Now he couldn't bear it. He didn't want to feel all the emotions he was feeling right now. He had been so stupid to think that he had already hit rock bottom. No matter how bad things are, they can always get worse.

A thought popped into his brain. He remembered how invincible and numb the beer from earlier made him feel. _Drinking away your feelings was stupid and dangerous, and certainly not behaviour expected of an honour student,_ he thought, but he was already walking down the stairs towards the kitchen, towards the large collection of wines kept for guests.

His heart was hammering and his palms sweating as he brought the bottle into his room, he wasn't sure if it was nerves over being caught or fear from the events of earlier.

He sat on the bed, staring at the drink, and after only a moments hesitation put the bottle to his lips. It tasted bad, a strong, sour taste, but he didn't care. The comforting burn down his throat and steady warmness spreading through him was worth it. After a few more sips he felt calm and the bad thoughts stopped, then he was asleep before he made it a quarter way through the bottle.

* * *

He wasn't allowed to leave his room for the whole weekend. Not even to go to the kitchen. When he woke Saturday morning, his head feeling fuzzy and his mouth dry. _Was this a hangover?_ He could live with this.

He went to open his bedroom door, he found it locked. He tried a few more times, but the door just rattled in its frame, he could hear the familiar clanking of chains and bolts on the other side holding it shut He sighed, finally letting go of the door handle. He should of expected this. He trudged to his ensuit, dipping his head into the sink and drinking directly from the taps. The water tasted so cool and refreshing on his scratchy throat that he didn't even care about how uncouth he was being.

He heard the clanging of a key entering a lock, and stood up straight so quickly he almost whacked his head on the wall. Before he even had a chance to prepare himself, his father entered the room. Just the sight of him made Gakushuu feel numb with dread. The man looked immaculate as always in his impossibly ironed crisp white shirt and trousers. Gakushuu couldn't recall ever seeing him walking around in pajamas, even on a Saturday morning.

"You look dreadful." Was the man's first words. Gakushuu felt a spike of irritation- he doubted the Chairman would look so pristine if he'd just experienced literal torture.

"Good morning to you too." Gakushuu replied- not too confrontational, not too passive. The man was looking at him with eyes simmering with rage that could boil over at any second. He was clearly still angry about yesterday. Gakushuu would have to tread very carefully.

"I have rather a lot of work to catch up on." The Chairman said. "Due to the amount of time I had to invest, reprimanding you for your... antics."

There was a long pause, and Gakushuu realised that he was expected to answer.

"Sorry for the inconvenience." He said. It came out sounding bitter and defiant despite attempting to sound genuine.

"Don't worry, I'll make sure that you are." His father said with a cold smile. He tossed Gakushuu a loaf of bread, which he caught. "This should last you the weekend."

He then looked at Gakushuu with teasing eyes, almost daring him to protest. Gakushuu didn't- the prospect of being locked in a room with limited food supplies sounded a lot better than dealing directly with his father right now.

"Thank you." Was Gakushuu's response. It almost sounded genuine.

* * *

Gakushuu tried to keep himself busy for the rest of the day. He worked slowly and indulgently on his homework, in attempt to force himself to think of nothing but academics. The white papers with reams of questions and problems was his escape. But every time he moved, he felt a twinge of pain from his back, and he was suddenly filled with the overwhelming urge to finish the wine bottle.

He forced himself to resist. _He shouldn't lower himself to using alcohol as an escape!_

After stretching it out as long as possible, his homework was done by the afternoon. With his phone and laptop confiscated, he tried other ways to occupy his time and distract himself.. He tried reading but he couldn't concentrate, he couldn't bring himself to play the guitar, a rubix cube took less than a minute.

He ended up just bouncing a ball against his wall repeatedly, trying to drown out the thoughts. It didn't work.

He was trapped alone in this prison, with nothing but his thoughts.

By early evening, he pulled out the bottle and took a sip. It tasted bitter and comforting at the same time. Once again, he felt a dark blanket of calmness descend over him, and he fell into a deep dreamless sleep.

The next day, he lasted even less time before he pulled out the bottle and drank himself into a stupor.

* * *

He woke up on Monday feeling like shit. The mixture of drinking and lack of food has left an unpleasant curdling feeling in the pit of his stomach. He was terrified his father would know what he had done, even after he had scrubbed his teeth excessively clean, but when the man was none the wiser.

The Chairman unlocked the door to his room and stood before Gakushuu, regarding him with calculating eyes.

"I hope for your sake you've learnt your lesson." He said, before walking fully into the room. There were clean bandages in his hand. "After all. You have a permanent reminder of what happens when you disobey me."

His father sat down on the bed, next to him. "Now. Let's see how that permanent reminder is healing."

* * *

Just like the week previous, things seemed normal when he was at school. With one difference- Nagisa and Karma where back. They weren't in his class, thank God, every time he caught sight of one of them in the corridors or the cafeteria, it was a reminder that things weren't normal. People had been badly hurt because of him.

He couldn't even bring himself to look at Nagisa, afraid of what he might see..

He fell into a routine; Get up, go to school, act like his usual self and pretend everything was normal, do whatever extra curricular activities he had, get driven home by his father, do his homework, drink till he fell asleep. It worked. The hangovers got progressively worse, but it worked. He could manage this.

Or at least he thought he could. On Wednesday, was the school baseball tournament. His team won. Just about.

Hangovers and running where not a good combination. He was almost sick on one of the bases. That would of been mortifying.

Afterwards, as he stood alone in the shower, a wave of nausea overtook him. The steam filling his lungs felt like a toxic gas, tiny black dots blinded his vision. He stumbled out of the cubical, feeling his way with his hands. It took all his concentration not to fall on his face. Breathing heavily, he took a towel off the hook and wrapped it around himself, leaning against the cubical.

"Are you alright?" Ren's voice asked, emerging from the cubical next to him.

"Fine." Gakushuu breathed out. He currently didn't have the energy to form a complete sentence, let alone think of a decent excuse for his current state. He felt Ren stand over him.

"You don't look fine- should I get a teacher?" Ren questioned, sounding worried. Gakushuu wished he'd go away. He wanted to be left to suffer in peace.

"No. I'm fine." He insisted, forcing a smile which he had a feeling might seemed more pained than reassuring.

"Well, if you say so- Wait! Asano, what's that on your back!?" Ren exclaimed. Gakushuu's eyes widened, pulling the slipped towel further up his back, hiding the injury. He opened his mouth, but was unable to conjure up an explanation that would adequately explain the wound.

"Asano?" Ren prompted, his voice sounded strained. Gakushuu's vision had cleared up, he no longer felt seconds away from vomiting, or passing out, or both.

"Don't worry about it." He said, standing up straight and walking back towards the changing cubicles.

"Asano, I really think-"

"Don't worry about it." Gakushuu cut him off. Ren called his name again, but didn't go after him.

Afterwards, in student council, Ren, Gakushuu and the rest of the students sat opposite each other around the table. Other than a few worried glances, Ren acted perfectly normal. He didn't try to broach the topic of what had happened in the shower room.

As they parted ways, Gakushuu thought he'd feel relieved on Ren's silence, but rather, he felt a cloud of darkness descend on him. He felt disappointed.

 _It's stupid. I knew those friendships are superficial. People only care when it's convenient to them_.

* * *

He sat on a bench outside the school, waiting for his father to finish work (going home with him had been another stipulation). He could hardly wait to go home and take another bottle of wine. Something to blur these dark and stormy feelings. Everything felt pointless.

He heard a familiar laughter in the distance. He looked up, and sure enough He could see a blue haired boy and a redhead walking past the school gate. Karma and Nagisa. From this distance, he couldn't quite make out their facial expressions, but he could tell they were laughing.

He felt a spike of jealousy. But also something else. A sort of closure. Nagisa was going to be fine.

* * *

"You've not been taking care of this." His father remarked on Thursday evening. Gakushuu was lying on his stomach atop his bed. He hissed in pain when the man pressed a finger against one of the lacerations.

"It's not exactly easily accessible." Gakushuu retorted. But that wasn't the real reason he had been neglecting his injury. It was because he didn't want to think about it. Let alone look at it.

"But still. It's healing fine." His father said. "The swelling has subsided, you can read it now."

"Read it?" Gakushuu questioned, regretting it immediately. His father let out a genuinely amused chuckle.

"You mean you haven't realised yet?" He snickered, voice full of mirth. Gakushuu sincerely wanted to punch the man in the throat.

"..."

"Here. Let me show you." The Chairman said in a sugary voice. Gakushuu heard rustling, then the snap of a camera. The next thing he knew, his father had shoved his phone in his face.

It was a picture of himself, specifically of the injury. It made him shudder to see himself like that. He'd always hated seeing the pictures taken of himself in vulnerable positions. At first, the wound just looked like a collection of randomly placed lacerations, then he realised they were rough, but they were kanji. Words carved into his back. Then he realised what those words spelt.

浅野 學峯

His eyes widened in horror, he felt sick. His father started laughing, genuinely laughing, as if Gakushuu's reaction was the funniest thing he'd ever seen. Gakushuu got up off the bed, pushing past his father and standing in front of the mirror. Sure enough, the reverse of the words were reflected back to him.

This was his permanent reminder. An ugly disfigurement physically carved onto his body.

"You really must be getting slow if you didn't realise." His father said. "Physical proof you are my property. You belong to me." He laughed again when Gakushuu continued gawking. "Stop being so dramatic. There are worse things I could of done to you than write my name on you."

The worst part is that Gakushuu knew he was right.

* * *

That entire week, Gakushuu had tried to be at least somewhat careful with his drinking, not being so excessive that he was drunk at school. On Friday, he stopped giving a shit. He drunk so much the night before, when he woke up, he was still intoxicated, then drank some more for good measure. For some reason, he couldn't bring himself to care. He just took extra care to keep his mouth shut on the journey to school.

In class, he was practically giddy, shouting out of turn during lessons. The teacher took it as him being 'enthusiastic', which made him laugh even harder, because these idiots thought he was such a golden boy even being a drunken idiot got him praised.

At lunchtime, Ren approached him. "Asano, are you okay?" He asked hesitantly. Gakushuu snorted, holding his chopsticks sloppily.

"I'm fantastic. Why do you ask?" He said, unable to stop the slight slur to his words.

"You're not really acting like your usual self." Ren said, an awkward tilt to his voice. There was a tentative look in his eyes, as if Gakushuu was something unpredictable, something to be careful around. Behind Ren, Gakushuu could see many other people peering over, giving him that same look- one of curiosity, one of caution. He felt a wave of shame.. _what was he thinking?_ He didn't realise how drunk he was acting. In one idiotic move, that'd be his reputation down the trash. He really way loosing everything.. his body, his mind, and now this.

In that moment, a calm resolve came over him. He decided he didn't want to keep loosing more pieces of himself, painfully and slowly like wanted to end it all now.

"Ren, do me a favour." Gakushuu said, standing up onto his feet. "Don't pretend to care."

With that, he turned around and walked out the door, heading towards the exit, ignoring those calling his name after him.

* * *

Gakushuu had never skipped school before. He felt an unusual thrill in his chest as he passed the school gates undetected. Maybe he could slightly understand the appeal of delinquency to those like Akabane now. _Maybe._

Gakushuu felt a strange calm overtake his body, knowing that very soon he wouldn't have to deal with his father ever again. He had been so stupid to fool himself into thinking he could live his life like that- drinking every night, living in constant fear of inevitably fucking up somehow and inuring his father's wrath.

Pulling his coat on to hide his school uniform, Gakushuu headed towards his favourite restaurant. Might as well have some steak for a last meal.

The revelation that he had to kill himself seemed sudden, but part of him knew that this ultimatum had been there for a long time in the back of his mind. He just had to realise it.

After filling himself up (and spending a considerable amount) on food, Gakushuu was starting to feel slightly more sober, and doubts were starting to fill his mind. He couldn't have that. Without even questioning himself, he snuck into a supermarket, and headed down the drinks aisle, grabbing the first thing he could, slipping it into his jacket, then bolting out of the shop. The cashier didn't even raise an eyebrow. She apparently wasn't paid enough to stop thieves. A giddy feeling swirled in his stomach- _who knew shoplifting would be so much fun?_

Gakushuu found himself a park bench out of the way of the streams of kids now leaving school, and twisted the cap off the class and took a sip. It tasted like pure chemicals, burning his throat on the way down. But he knew the calm it would give him would be worth it. Gakushuu's drinking was interrupted by the sudden ringing of his phone. He pulled it out. His father, of course. After only a moments hesitation, he raised the device, then threw it onto the ground. The smash was so satisfying, he started laughing to himself.

Despite how acrid it was, Gakushuu finished the whole 500ml bottle. His tongue became numb to the taste, and after the first few sips it was almost pleasant. His head span and his vision was blurred, his body couldn't quite obey his commands.

 _So this was how it ends_. He thought bitterly. He wondered what would happen after he died- Likely people would make a huge deal of it, then move on. Nobody really cared about him.- Except for perhaps Nagisa. And it had brought him nothing but misery.

Gakushuu's only regret was that his father would get away with everything.

On a whim, he pulled out some paper from his book bag, and started writing. He doubted people would believe him, but he at least wanted to make people try and understand why he was going to do. When he finished the suicide note, he stuffed it in his pocket.

Right.

Times up.

 _Now I find somewhere to jump._

* * *

The usual fifteen minute walk to the bridge took far longer when you were heavily intoxicated and either bumping into things or tripping over your own feet every few minutes. Gakushuu put his hood up over his head to protect his identity. Despite his plan, he still wasn't thrilled about anyone recognising him in this embarrassing state.

As he neared the bridge, he bumped into yet another person- a boy his age.

"Have you ever heard of looking were your going?" The other growled.

Gakushuu continued walking, planning on making a hasty retreat, when he heard.

"Asano. Of course."

He felt a jolt go through him. He recognised that voice.

"Akabane. What a strange coincidence I'd see you now of all times." He retorted, saying exactly what he was thinking. It seemed he ran into Karma at the worst of times. Everything had gotten fucked up when this bastard had arrived. Gakushuu took a stumbling step forward, inspecting his arrogant face. Maybe he should hit it, just for fun, one last time.

"You're a nasty piece of work, you know that?" Gakushuu said, words brimming to the surface. "You're rude and and arrogant- you're constantly getting into trouble.."

"You're one to talk-." Karma countered curtly.

"But you know, maybe you aren't so bad." Gakushuu cut Karma off. Compared to Gakushuu, right now he seemed like the sensible one, the one in control. In fact, the guy hadn't caused trouble at all really since his suspension had been lifted. His grades were good and he did seem to look after Nagisa. Despite how much Gakushuu hated him, maybe he was the best thing for Nagisa. "You aren't a complete idiot, and you do care about Nagisa, don't you?"

"More than you ever could." Karma said. Gakushuu thought about how the only type of love he'd ever known had been manipulative and self-serving. He couldn't love purely if he tried.

"Probably." He agreed, feeling bitter and relieved once again at the same time. "You need to look after Nagisa, okay? Don't mess him around, don't let anyone hurt him. Protect him."

Without waiting for an answer, Gakushuu walked away. This was closure. For all his faults, Karma would look after Nagisa. The two of them would go on and live full and happy lives, they'll never be effected by Gakushuu and the evil inside of him again.

* * *

It was a miracle in itself that Gakushuu had even managed to climb up onto the bridge- It was a huge old structure, lying across an abandoned quarry like a mangled iron insect. It used to be part of a Trainline, but the trains no longer traveled this route. The bridge had been left in disrepair, desolate other than a few tramps that would sleep under it, and the odd teenager who would go exploring.

Thanks to his drunken state, Gakushuu was covered in dirt and bruises by the time he reached the platform. He'd slipped down the grassy verge leading up there more times than he'd cared to remember. Somewhere along the way, he'd lost his left shoe.

His vision was really swimming now, he practically had to crawl to keep his balance. It was windy up here- the air rushed through his hair as he stared ahead. it was a nice feeling- liberating.

Still swaying, he stumbled to the edge of the bridge, looking down. It seemed an impossibly long fall. The ground below swirled in his vision, and the hard concrete looked invitingly fatal. He could already imagine it as he stood over the edge- _Jumping, the brief moment of panic when he realised the irreversibility of his action, the air blowing past his face, the crash into the ground. Then nothing._

He took a tentative step forward, his feet half way off the platform now. He knocked a few stones, which fell, dissapearing from his vision before they hit the ground. He would join them soon. He looked up for a moment, taking in the cityscape before him. The town was bathed in the warm orange light of sunset. From here he could see the school- an ugly grey building hulking over the streets below it. Cars zoomed by the size of ants, street lights were starting to flicker to on. Even with his vision swirling, it was still a beautiful sight.

Everything was just running on as normal, and it would continue to just the same when he was no longer there. Tomorrow, people would get up and go to school or work, the shops would open, the train lines would run, just the same as they always did.

It wasn't all bad. Gakushuu decided, as he let go of the railing behind him. As hard as it was, he genuinely enjoyed being a high achiever. All the competitions in school and out, the places he'd been to, the sense of achievement he'd felt. It was best he ended it now while he could still remember the good stuff.

Without closing his eyes- he saw that as cowering away- he took a step forward onto nothingness.

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Except he didn't fall. Instead, he felt something wrap around his upper arms and hold him in place. Something- someone- pulled him backwards, dragging him back over the railing onto the hard floor beneath.

"What the _hell_ were you going to do?" A voice from above him said. Gakushuu looked up to see a familiar red head boy stood over him, his hands still tightly gripping his arms.

Gakushuu gawked in shock- he wasn't sure what to say; make a snippy remark about how it was obvious was he was doing, yell at Karma for interfering, question how he found him.

But instead, he opened his mouth, leaned forward, and vomited on the floor in front of him.

* * *

 **Phew! Thanks for reading it till the end!**

 **I like to call this chapter- 'Gakushuu shoves a lifetime worth of breakdowns into two weeks'. I think he's a very strong character, so although he's had some suicidal thoughts for a long time, it took a lot to actually push him to a complete breaking point. He really feels like he's lost everything and there's nothing worth living for.**

 **But of course, I didn't want to actually kill him off, so Karma's there to save the day.**

 **Thank you for all the comments and support, they really motivated me to get this chapter out! Please let me know what you thought of this chapter, and what you would like to see next**

 **Reply to guest reviews (from most to least recent);**

 **Guest 1: I'm glad you think my writing is realistic, I try my best to give characters believable arcs, but sometimes I worry it's a bit too cartoony.**

 **Guest 2: The cliffhanger from last chapter has been answered. With another cliffhanger (sort of?) in this chapter.**

 **Queen: Thank you! I'm glad you like all the shades of grey.**

 **Guest 3: Thank you for the kind works! Your wish is my command, more sad bruised boys coming up.**

 **TY: thanks for the comments.**

 **MissEna: thanks for the comment. I hope you get to read this chapter too (I know it's been a while). And yeah, out of the main three characters, Karma probably is the most stable at the moment (God help them..). There wasn't really any proper Nagisa and Karma interaction in this chapter, but their dynamic will be further developed in future chapters. I hope this chapter was a decent pay off for the final Asano scene in the previous chapter.**

 **Thank you for all the comments and**


	23. Chapter 23

**Warning for people going to read this chapter, this will feature a character being sick a few times. I don't describe it in detail or anything, but if that stuff freaks you out, beware.**

* * *

Getting Asano back to his house hadn't been easy. After pulling him off the edge of the bridge, Karma was ready to shout at him, lecture him, tell him how stupid he was being, but it soon became apparent that Asano wasn't really in the right state for listening, in fact, he wasn't in the right state for doing anything besides vomiting and falling over. Under any other circumstances, it might be funny.

Karma had briefly considered taking Asano back to his own house, but decided that even he wasn't cruel enough to put Asano in front of his father in this state, as amusing as that may be, and he really didn't know where else he could take him. When Karma asked Asano for the address for one of his friend's houses, he just got the infuriating response of ' _I don't have any friends_ '.

So That's how how Karma had ended up half-dragging an incredibly intoxicated Asano Gakushuu home. At first, the other had resisted.

"Why did you stop me? You hate me." Asano had asked, after he had stopped being sick the first time, after Karma had pulled him back from the edge. Karma glared at him, his hands still shaking from the adrenaline- he'd almost been too late.

"I do." He snapped, feeling angry. "Doesn't mean I want you dead."

Asano wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. "You should just let me.. 'M better off dead."

If Asano didn't look so pathetic and defeated, Karma might of hit him, but instead he just clenched his fist and grit his teeth. "You're an idiot." He growled. "How do you think Nagisa would of felt if you killed yourself? He would feel responsible. How many other people would be destroyed by your death? You really do only think of yourself!"

Asano got to his feet at that, looking enraged. "I was doing this for everyone!" He slurred, shoving Karma an action that almost sent himself falling back to the floor. Karma rolled his eyes. It was clear there was no point in arguing with this drunk idiot, and the quicker he got Asano away from any tall edges the better he'd feel.

"C'mon." Karma huffed, taking the other's shoulder and practically guiding him back off the bridge. Karma expected him to put up more resistance, but the fight went out of Asano and he just followed.

The rest of the journey home had not been easy, Asano seemed to be dipping in and out of being a half-functional drunk and completely black-out drunk.

After Karma's initial anger and adrenaline had burned out, he actually began to think _why had Asano chosen to get drunk and kill himself?_ So he asked him. Asano and shrugged, avoiding eye-contact.

"It was inevitable."

"That's not a real reason, genius."

Asano glared at him. "You think just because you pulled me off the bridge I'm going to spill my guts to you?"

Karma actually chuckled a little at that, despite everything. "Well, I thought _saving your life_ might be worth something."

Asano didn't reply, he just surged forwards to a nearby bin and very _literally_ spilled his guts. Following this, he slid down to the floor and after a good few seconds, Karma realised he wasn't going to get up unprompted. Karma tapped him with his foot.

"Don't think I wont leave you here- " He warned. Asano didn't budge and Karma realised he'd fallen asleep in the middle of the street- _Just how much had he drank?-_ with a labored groan, Karma lent over and dragged him up. He wondered, not for the first time, why he was helping this bastard, but the answer was obvious.

* * *

As soon as they got back, Karma had dumped Asano unceremoniously on the bathroom floor, and to his credit he had made a bee-line straight for the toilet, tipping his head over the bowl. Karma went to the kitchen, quickly pouring a glass of water and pulling out a pack of crisps. When he returned, Asano was sat in his underwear and a T-shirt, his school shirt and trousers in a crumpled pile on the floor. Karma smirked.

"That's right, make yourself at home." Karma said sardonically. Asano's eyes widened in alarm.

"What the hell are you doing in my house?" He shouted, pulling his knees towards his chest defensively. Karma chuckled.

"Look around. Does this look like your house. You came to my house, remember?" Karma said, slowly. Asano frowned, looking around the room with confused eyes.

"Oh yeah." Asano murmured. Karma snorted.

"Jesus how much did you drink?" he questioned, handing Asano the water. "Drink this." He commanded, and the other did as he was told, chugging the water like it was his salvation. Karma took out his phone and took a picture, because the great Gakushuu Asano slumped over the toilet bowl, in his underwear, drunk out of his mind, was too good a piece of black-mail material to ignore. Besides, Karma felt he was owed it after putting up with Asano's drunken antics and _saving_ his goddamn life.

When he'd finished the water and the crisps- and almost swallowed the mouthwash-, Karma lead Asano to one of the guest bedrooms.

"You should of let me commit suicide. My dad's gonna kill me anyway. I didn't come home, I smashed my phone, I'm already dead." Asano groaned, his eyes going wide at the sudden realization.

"He's not going to _actually_ kill you." Karma rebutted. Asano shook his head.

"He's going to take me apart piece by piece." Asano replied, looking genuinely terrified. Karma frowned.

"That's why you tried to jump, isn't it? Your Dad." Karma said, his voice held neither contempt nor comfort. Asano didn't reply, but he didn't have to. "No matter how bad he is, killing yourself isn't the way out, you had other options. You could of gone to the police, heck- you could of ran away. Even that is better than being dead."

"I'm sorry, I didn't realise it was so easy." Asano said bitterly, still slurring his words. "You did this for Nagisa, didn't you? Helped me, I mean."

"Yes." Karma said, he didn't think there was much point in lying, his motivations were obvious. Initially pulling Asano off the ledge had been pure reaction, but everything after that, he did it for Nagisa, so Nagisa wouldn't have to live with the pain of his first love committing suicide. Karma knew Nagisa would never forget Asano if he died. The dead have a way of lingering far longer than the living.

"If you really want to protect Nagisa.. you should of let me do it.." Asano said, his voice heavy. He was asleep before Karma could ask him what he meant. As much as he hated Asano, he couldn't help but feel bad for him, as funny as it was, it was sad seeing someone as proud as him in this pathetic state. Karma wasn't stupid enough to think that stopping Asano from killing himself would solve everything, tomorrow Asano would have to wake up and face the same problems. But at least he was alive. _Still, what had he meant about Nagisa?_

Speaking of Nagisa.. Karma sent him a quick text _'call me when you're free',_ Karma hated that he couldn't just call Nagisa up whenver he wanted, but his mother would be predictably pissed if he called during meal times or something. Karma left the room with a heavy sigh, trying to gather his thoughts.. maybe when Asano woke up and sobered up he could convince him to get help, otherwise it would probably only be a matter of time before he tried something stupid again. It felt strange.. Karma knew he probably hated Asano more than anyone else did at their school, yet here he was helping him. Even if it was for Nagisa's sake, it still felt strange. Karma flicked on the TV in the living room as he waited for Nagisa's reply. Karma stared at the screen but he could not focus on whatever program was blurring in front of his eyes, his thoughts consumed with Nagisa and Asano.

A few hours later, his phone rang, and Karma answered it within seconds, his heart already feeling lighter.

"Karma?" Nagisa's voice sounded small and shaky- he must be being quiet so his mother wouldn't hear.

"Hey Nagisa." Karma replied, smiling. "Hows your Friday been?"

There was a small pause "The usual." He said. "How about you."

"The same." Karma replied. "That review meeting was such a waste of time- "

Karma didn't feel bad about lying to Nagisa. It wasn't even really lying, it was just omitting the truth. If Nagisa knew about what had happened to Asano, he'd worry, and Karma hated the thought of Nagisa worrying about Asano.

"I knew you'd say that. They could of told you the meaning of life and you'd still say that." Nagisa chuckled. Karma joined in the laughter.

"It's true! How many times do they want me to say sorry?" Karma said, feeling instantly relaxed speaking to Nagisa. He walked out the room as he spoke, closing the door. "They must know it's just lip-service. Honestly Nagisa, if you ever get suspended you'll see what I mean."

"Oh yeah, like I'll ever get suspended." Nagisa snorted.

"Who knows, I could make a bad boy out of you yet." Karma replied, conjuring an image in his mind of Nagisa in a leather jacket and shades.. actually that was kinda hot. He walked into the bathroom Asano had been occupying shortly before, the other's clothes still littering the floor.

"Maybe my mother was right about you." Nagisa teased. Karma could hear the smile behind his voice and it was adorable.

"Yeah I wont stop until I recruit you into my delinquent ranks." Karma said as he inspected the bathroom. He was supremely greatful that there wasn't any sick on the floor or surfaces. He picked up Asano's uniform from the floor. Maybe he could give these back to him at school, in front of his classmates. That would probably mortify Asano and raise a ton of questions about the nature of their relationship. It would be hilarious. _He might not come back to class. If Asano goes to social services or runs away, he wont come to that school again._

Nagisa laughed, but then it sounded slightly hollow. "About my mother. Tanaka.. you know, that kid who's my neighbour.. he told my mother we're still friends.. she wasn't happy." He said in a tentative voice. Karma knew Nagisa well enough at this point to know he was holding back his emotions.

"Nagisa, are you okay? She didn't hurt you, did she?.." Karma said darkly.

"I'm fine, she just shouted a lot. Mostly. She was more upset about the fight- " Nagisa cut himself off, but it was too late.

"Nagisa, what fight?" Karma asked, there was a pause on the other end of the line. A white letter fell out Asano's trouser pocket and Karma instinctively knew it was his suicide note. He picked it up, unfolding it. The writing was surprisingly neat for someone so drunk, but the words where a jumbled mess of run-on sentences. He realised that Nagisa hadn't answered him yet. "Nagisa, what fight?"

There was a sigh on the other end of the phone. "Promise you wont get mad?" Another pause. "I got in a fight with Seo Tomoya.. but I won, I think?"

"What exactly happened Nagisa, I know you aren't the type to get into fights- did that bastard attack you?"

"But like I said, I won." Nagisa said, his voice too shaky to be reassuring.

"This is my fault.. I shouldn't of let you walk home alone." Karma growled, his blood boiling. "Were you hurt?"

"Not really." Nagisa said. "And Karma, you shouldn't have to look after me."

"But clearly you need it- people are trying to hurt you all the time!" Karma hissed, he heard Nagisa sniff on the other end of the phone.

"Can we speak about it tomorrow? I don't want to thinking about it now.. Let's just talk about.. anything else" Nagisa asked, and Karma couldn't deny him.

"Fine. We'll talk about it tomorrow." Karma said, although he wanted nothing more than to find out _exactly_ what had happened right now. There was a pregnant pause. This wasn't exactly an easy topic to move on from. He glanced back down at the note

"Can we play mario-kart together online tonight? It'd be a fun distraction." Nagisa said.

"Are you that eager to loose?" Karma smirked, he was attempting light-hearted banter, but even he knew his words sounded hollow. Nagisa said something in reply, but Karma wasn't listening, because he had seen Nagisa's name in the suicide note, and he began to read more intently.

His eyes widened in horror. He must of read it wrong. But every time he read the sentence the content didn't change.

 _..Father found out._ _._

"Karma? Karma are you still there?"

 _..Tricked him into going to our house.._

"Karma? Can you still hear me?"

 _..Drugged him.._

"I think my reception is bad, I can't hear you- I'm going to the window."

 _..Tied me up and.._

"Can you hear me now?"

 _..Forced me to watch while he.._

"Karma?"

Karma's whole body went slack. The phone dropped out of his hand, Nagisa's voice still echoing out of it. He felt sick. He kept staring at the note, hoping he'd misread it, hoping somehow the words would change. He fell to his knees and wretched into the toilet bowl.

 _"Karma are you still there?"_

* * *

 **So yeah. Guess what Karma's just found out..!?**

 **If you think Gakushuu is OOC in this chapter (he kinda is) remember he is very, VERY drunk. And Karma helped him on Nagisa's behalf and also because he's not evil enough to let Asano actually die.**

 **For some context on time lines, this chapter takes place around the same time as chapter 21 (like they run pretty much concurrently).**

 **This chapter is going to be the set-up chapter of things to come. The characters have all reached some sort of breaking point (Nagisa's ordeal in ch 21 and finding out he may not even be able to socialise freely with Karma at school, Gakushuu's suicide attempt and of course now Karma finding out what happened to Nagisa at the end of this chapter).**

 **Thank you to everyone who reviews, especially people who have kept reviewing every chapter. They really inspire me to keep writing.**

 **Reply to guest reviews**

 **Miss Ena : **Thanks for the review, and yeah the last chapter was hard to write. This one came to my surprisingly easily. I guess that's because it's a more light-hearted chapter (kinda) at least until the end. Thanks for the continued support.


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